~ some Groucho Marx quotes ~~ these quotes are for my grandfather, one of the funniest people I have ever known, and a huge Marx brothers fan... I miss you ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife." "Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read." "Why was I with her? She reminds me of you. In fact, she reminds me more of you than you do!" "Either he's dead or my watch has stopped." 
"I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception." "One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I'll never know." "If I held you any closer I would be on the other side of you." "I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury." "I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members." "I must confess, I was born at a very early age." "Room service? Send up a larger room." "I could dance with you till the cows come home. On second thought, I'd rather dance with the cows till you come home." "Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes?" "A child of five could understand this. Fetch me a child of five." "Those are my principles. If you don't like them I have others." "He may look like an idiot and talk like an idiot but don't let that fool you. He really is an idiot." "Why, I'd horse-whip you if I had a horse." Quotes funny quotes Red Dwarf Beautiful World |
