Two guys were at a bar talking about how highly their wives thought of
              them. 

              The first guy said, "My wife, she thinks so much of me that she won't let
              me do any work around the house. It's incredible!" 

              The second guy says, "That's nothing. My wife
thinks I'm God!" 

              "She thinks you're God? What makes you say that?" 

              "Easy...Every night she places a burnt offering before me!"