Bank of Rose - 8.2.01
Rose: Hey. Hey. Need another hit from the bank of Rose?
Paul: No, I think I've got it.
Rose: Pop always told me you've got to have a couple bucks on you, 'cause you never know what's gonna happen.
Paul: Well, your father sounds like a wise man.
Rose: How's your mom?
Paul: She's better.
Rose: Better? Better's good.
Paul: Yes, physically, she's out of the woods. Doctors don't think there's any risk of infections.
Rose: Oh, that's great. Why aren't you doing the tarantella on top of this table?
Paul: I've got a lot going on.
Rose: Oh. Yeah, I heard Mr. Calm, cool and demented, he's got his day in court tomorrow, yeah?
Paul: Yeah. That'll be a great day, the day that he's hauled off to prison.
Rose: About 100 years or so. That would be nice, huh?
Paul: That'd be nice.
Rose: Yeah, very nice. But last time I checked, you blow somebody up, you don't get a slap on the wrist.
Paul: Why aren't you on the jury then?
Rose: I'll tell you a little story. Have a seat I was on a jury one time, one time, and the judge, he kicked me out because I said I don't like attorneys who wear more jewelry than I do.
Paul: I bet you did.
Rose: You know, this is really none of my beeswax, but you don't look like a guy who's on the winning team.
Paul: Well, there are no winners, Rose. I just got back from the hospital. My mother's still in pretty bad shape, so it's -
Rose: Wait, you just said -
Paul: Her face is all scarred up, and she's withdrawn, depressed.
Rose: Well, those surgeons, they are miracle workers with that scalpel. They'll be - she'll be back in no time, looking great.
Paul: Yeah, it's too soon to even get a consultation from a plastic surgeon.
Rose: So in the meantime, she's a poster child for damaged goods.
Paul: Yeah, something like that.
Rose: I'm real sorry.
Paul: Yeah. Me, too. Nothing I do or say helps.
Rose: Come on, I mean, your mom's life has been right through the shredder. I mean, you can't put it back together in five minutes. Come on.
Paul: But I've still got to try.
Rose: You've got to try. Yeah, I know how that goes. You've got to try. When someone you love gets kicked in the teeth, you've got to try, but sometimes trying doesn't put things back together again. You know, sometimes you've got to sit back and just let nature take its course, my friend.
Paul: Is this more of your father's wisdom?
Rose: Yeah, it is, as a matter of fact. Your Pop teach you nothing?
Paul: Let's not go there.
Rose: I'm gonna give you some advice. You probably don't want it, but I'm gonna give it anyway, 'cause that's the kind of girl I am. You've got to tell your mother you've got to see positive thinking. Right now, you know? Just think happy thoughts, happy memories. Don't let her watch the trial on TV. Don't let her read the newspapers, nothing. Let the lawyers handle all that.
Paul: That's easier said than done. She has to testify.
Rose: What are you talkin' about? No, not these days. You've got closed-circuit TV. She doesn't have to be nowhere, nobody has to see her say that Craig is a wet piece of toilet paper.
Paul: No, she decided she wants to testify.
Rose: You're kidding me? Oh, well - wow. Really? I've met a lot of tough broads in my life, but that is tough. I'm impressed. That's the toughest - I mean, Lucinda Walsh couldn't even put enough needles in that guy to make him scream. I've got an idea. Yeah. When they say that he's absolutely, 100% guilty, we rent out java underground, have a big party, invite the whole town.
Paul: That sounds like a plan. Are you buying?
Rose: No. I don't have any - I have no money. But Lucinda, she's got money. She'll pay for it, soup to nuts. He's done her wrong. Trust me.
Paul: Okay, well, I guess it's good that at least one of them get what they deserve.
Rose: One?
Paul: Yeah, Craig didn't act alone. He and his lover plotted to take over B.R.O. and kill my mother.
Rose: Wait - do you have - are you telling me you've got proof that Carly and Craig were having an affair?
Paul: Yeah, Carly and Craig were conspiring from the very beginning.
Rose: This town - Craig - Jack - I thought Carly was with Jack. Wasn't that the love of her life, Jack Snyder? You know who I'm talking about.
Paul: Yeah. Yeah, apparently. Apparently, she likes variety.
Rose: Wow. Did your mom know about this?
Paul: Yeah, she saw the signs of it, but it wasn't until after she got out of her coma that she put it all together and - actually, it was you that helped us figure it all out.
Rose: Me?
Paul: Yeah. When you pretended to be Lily and got me into Craig's suite, and I found those sketched that she left -
Rose: Yeah?
Paul: That was the second time Craig tried to sneak her designs into the firm.
Rose: Second time? No kiddin'. So I did that, huh? I busted the case wide open.
Paul: But the D.A. doesn't consider that to be hard evidence.
Rose: What are you talking about? What do they want? They want pictures of him setting the bomb off?
Paul: More or less, yeah. She offered him a soft deal, and then she won't even consider bringing up separate charges against Carly being a co-conspirator.
Rose: Oh, that's terrible. You know, this justice system really is terrible. Well, you know what? If there's anything that I can - anything I can do for you, just - or Lily - you just holler. I'll help you out.
Paul: Thanks, Rose. I appreciate that.
Rose: Good luck tomorrow, 'cause I'll be - I'll be thinkin' about you. Good luck.
Paul: All right. Thank you.
Rose: Yes, I will be thinking about you. Very nice.
My Guardian Angel - 8.3.01
Rose: You are gonna be so glad - so glad that you got my message.
Paul: I understand that's your favorite.
Rose: Oh, yes, it is. But I got something better - better than a decaf cappy for you, handsome. (Rose chuckles) I am so glad you're sittin' down because you're gonna fall over. You gotta look at this.
Rose: Look. (holds up 8 x 10 glossy of Craig and Carly in a lip lock)
Paul: Where did you -
Rose: It - it all started about some phony story about some lost bracelet. Look, if Carly lost a bracelet, it's down Craig's throat.
Paul: What - I -
Rose: No, no, no, never mind. Look - what do you think? What do you think?
Paul: I think these are exactly what the district attorney needs to put Craig and Carly away for a very, very long time. Okay, I've got to get on these right away.
Rose: Yes, you do. You go. You run with that.
Paul: Rose, I don't know what to say. You keep coming through for me.
Rose: Oh!
Paul: You're incredible. You are incredible.
Rose: Oh, and I thought Italians were emotional. Look at you.
Paul: You hit the Jackpot on this one.
Rose: Yes, I did. Oh, wow. Are you sure you're not, like, a little bit of Italian?
Paul: I don't think so. Today, I feel 100% Irish with luck like this.
Rose: No jury's gonna feel pity for that guy, you know, getting a little on the side on the day of his wedding with someone who is not his bride.
Paul: These were taken on the day of the wedding?
Rose: Yeah. Look. Look at the date.
Paul: You almost got away with it, didn't you, Craig? Almost.
Rose: So what's our next move?
Paul: First, I need to know where you got these.
Rose: Oh, you're not gonna believe this. It was, like, handed to me on a silver platter by Carly Tenney herself.
Paul: You're right, I don't believe you. What happened?
Rose: She came over to Lucinda's looking for Lily. She had this desperate look in her eye, you know? I asked her what was wrong. She fed me this line of garbage, said she wanted to look at the security cameras the day of the wedding to see if she lost this bracelet.
Paul: But you knew there was more to it?
Rose: She might as well have said "flimsy excuse" tattooed across her chest. But you know what? I said I bought her story. I said I'd look into it. I found these.
Paul: Okay, so no one else has seen these besides you?
Rose: No, no. I saw them. I said, "You'd want to look at them and bring them right to the D.A."
Paul: Okay, well, let me ask you one more favor, rose.
Rose: Anything.
Paul: I need you to talk to Carly and play dumb like you haven't seen anything. Can you do that?
Rose: Very well. After what Montgomery did to Lucinda's company, and Carly, that broad, trying to help him out, it would be my pleasure to bring them both down a couple of pegs.
Paul: Okay. If you play it that way with Carly, then everything else should fall in place. Think you can handle it?
Rose: Are you kidding me? Dealing with Carly Tenney, piece of cake.
Paul: Wait. I can't believe you're real.
Rose: Yeah, I know I'm weird.
Paul: No, no, no, no. I mean you're like my guardian angel.
Rose: Angel? You said angel? Wow. No. You don't know a lot of things that I've done in my past.
Paul: All I know is what you've done for me, and since I've been back in town, you've bailed me out three different times. I owe you.
Rose: No, you don't. No. I mean, I haven't had anything better to do than help you, but I like it. I really enjoy helping you, and if you put that creep, deal with him after what he's done to everybody, it helps me and my family, so let's think of it as a selfish act, okay?
Paul: Hey, I'm still eternally grateful.
Rose: Oh.
Paul: And if you ever need anything, I insist you come to me.
Rose: Anything?
Paul: That's what I said.
Rose: Oh. Well, make promises you can't keep.
Paul: Don't worry. I always find a way.
Rose: I bet you do. I gotta gouse Carly - I told her I'd get back to her right away. I don't want her to get suspicious.
Paul: Okay. Good thinking. And call me when you're done. I need to get these to the D.A. Call me when you're done. I want to make sure that Carly takes the bait.
Rose: I'll call you, yes, and she will take the bait. You better believe it. Don't worry. Rosie D.'s on the case.
Dinner perhaps? - 8.13.01
Rose: Hey, sailor!
Lucinda: Oh, darling.
Paul: Hey, Rose!
Rose: Hi.
Paul: Lucinda.
Lucinda: Hello, Paul. How is your mother this morning?
Paul: She won't be here, but her mind is at ease.
Rose: That's all that matters.
Paul: Rose, I want to thank you. Over dinner perhaps?
Lucinda: You're thanking Rose? Thanking her for what?
Rose: I did something for him. How about tonight?
Paul: Huh? Well -
Rose: I'm joking. Not tonight.
Paul: Listen, I have to have a word with Jessica, but I'll talk to you afterwards, okay?
Rose: Yeah, you'll talk to me, mm-hmm.
Paul: Okay.
Drinking to a common enemy - 8.14.01
Craig: How'd you get those photographs?
Lucinda: Oh, I can't take credit for that.
Craig: You?
Paul: Nothing would have made me happier. But no.
Craig: Rose?
Rose: Yes. Absolutely. Who knew a dumb Jersey girl like me could outmaneuver a mogul like Craig Montgomery. Never underestimate the power of a woman, Craig.
Lucinda: I can't take credit for that, either. I didn't raise her.
Craig: Well, enjoy yourselves, ladies. Everything comes around.
Lucinda: That's what they say. Oh, by the way, how much time do you do for trying to blow away your old lady? Is it 80 years? That'll do for us, won't it? It's fine with us. (to Paul) Well, did you want to come back to the house for a drink? I have some lovely champagne.
Rose: Yes, please come with us.
Paul: I don't know if that'd be a good idea.
Lucinda: Paul, you are truly welcome.
Paul: All right, all right.
Lucinda: Come on.
Lucinda: I've been saving this for - it's very good - for something special. And what's better than Craig Montgomery getting his - ha-ha.
Rose: Mmm. A wine cooler this is not. It's very good.
Lucinda: Ah, it's good, isn't it? But, darling, Paul, since you're here, let's drink to us. Never adversaries.
Paul: Nothing like sharing a common goal.
Lucinda: It's not too crass is it? To drink to a common enemy?
Rose: No! Drink, drink, drink.
Paul: No, never. But we should have a drink to you, Rose. If it weren't for you, the D.A. would have had a difficult time getting a conviction, so cheers.
Rose: Oh. Cheers. I'll send ya the bill.
Paul: No, you owe me - a dinner, remember?
Rose: Oh, yeah. Yeah.
Lucinda: Oh, darling, you - oh, well that's okay, there's plenty more. Help yourself to some more.
Rose: All right.
Lucinda: Hey, Paul, you know something? Your instincts are 100%. Cause next week, Rose has a birthday.
Paul: Hmm, thanks for the tip.
Rose: What are guys whisperin' about over there?! No secrets!
Lucinda: What? Innocent looking me?
Rose: Oh, you're about as innocent as a crocodile, Ms. Walsh.
Paul: Looks like I'm not the only one with good instincts in this room. Ladies, it's been lovely, but I've got to go.
Lucinda: Oh.
Rose: Oh.
Lucinda: Oh, so soon?
Paul: Yeah, my mother's expecting me, so -
Rose: Oh. At least you have good news for her.
Paul: Yeah.
Rose: Right.
Lucinda: Please, give her my best.
Paul: I will. And, Rose, thank you.
Rose: Oh, you're welcome. What were you talking about? Come on, spill it!
Lucinda: No. I was just - I was just telling him what a great gal you are.
Rose: Oh, with your natural light touch, I'm sure.
Lucinda: Well, what's wrong with that? You're interested in him, aren't ya?
Rose: Oh, he's - he's interesting. He's nice.
Lucinda: Uh-huh. Oh, darling, sip, sip. Hold it down there and sip.
Rose: Hmm, that's excellent. Gave me heartburn, though. I gotta go.
Lucinda: Yeah, he's a nice boy! But you're missing something else. He's also a very useful one.
Smile - 8.16.01
Rose: Hey!
Paul: Hey, Rose!
Rose: You're here for the knockout round, huh?
Paul: Yeah, I came for my mother. I'd love to be able to tell her that there's light at the end of this tunnel, you know? So -
Rose: I picked up "The Times" today. I saw Carly Tenney was arrested. I thought, "What do you know? Our justice system might work after all."
Paul: Yeah, the wheels of justice are grinding slowly, though, Rose.
Rose: Hey, at least they're grinding. Where I come from, Vinnie Dilauro, that's the only guy you need for justice - a bat, a confession and a long walk on a short pier. So Carly getting arrested, that's good, right?
Paul: Yeah, the best.
Rose: I bet the only accessory she thought she was gonna be was on Craig's arm when they took over your mother's company.
Paul: Yep. When those two are finally put behind bars, you can give yourself a big pat on the back.
Rose: Me? Nah, I did nothin'.
Paul: Nothing, huh? How many hours of security footage did you have to go through before you finally found that picture that linked Craig and Carly?
Rose: Well -
Paul: Hmm? It was the only solid evidence the D.A. had.
Rose: Oh, anything to stop that creep from ruining more people's lives. What's a few extra minutes, right?
Paul: I want to do something to repay you, Rose.
Rose: Don't say the p-a-y word with me. I'm allergic.
Paul: No, no, I really am grateful.
Rose: Oh, really? Well, you did mention something about taking me out for my birthday. If you're still game?
Paul: Yeah, okay.
Rose: You should do that more often.
Paul: What?
Rose: Smile. It lights up your face and your eyes.
Paul: Maybe we'll have reason to do that very soon.
Rose: I better get back to Lucinda and Sierra before they clock each other.
Paul: What, division in the ranks?
Rose: Oh, you kiddin' me? Sierra's testifying on Craig's behalf today. I mean, it sticks in Lucinda's craw like a hunk of dry gnocchi.
Paul: Yeah, it kills me, too. I can't see how any woman could possibly defend that monster after seeing what he did to my mother.
Life Isn't Fair - 8.20.01
Rose: You know, unleashing that picture of Craig and his tootsie was the right thing to do - at the time. It's too bad we're settin' up the wrong guy. I hate when that happens, you know? When life isn't fair or I'm not fair. You could make me feel better here. I mean, jump in at any time, please.
Paul: Rose, when has Craig ever worried about being fair? To you or anybody else? Any harm done to that man should be considered public service.
Rose: Not bad.
Paul: I was hoping we were gonna celebrate tonight.
Rose: Yeah, me, too.
Paul: Since there doesn't seem to be much to celebrate, I'm gonna go home, okay? Do you understand?
Rose: Oh, yeah! Sure. Yeah, I could use a change of scenery, too.
Paul: Okay, well, I'll see you soon, okay?
Rose: Okay, you bet.
Marrying Lucinda - 8.24.01
Rose: Hey! You look like you've seen a ghost.
Paul: This - this place used to belong to my father. And, now it's mine. And my mother's.
Rose: Oh, yeah, she told me.
Paul: What, you saw her?
Rose: Yeah. I brought her a pineapple. A housewarming thing.
Paul: Oh.
Rose: Yeah.
Paul: That's very sweet of you, Rose.
Rose: Oh, well, not everybody likes pineapple.
Paul: What, did she say something that upset you?
Rose: No. Oh, no, no, no. I totally understand, after everything she's been through.
Paul: Yeah, she's still in a lot of pain. And emotionally, she's -
Rose: She's a wreck.
Paul: You think?
Rose: Yeah, but I understand. I mean, I'd be the exact same way, you know, if I went through something like that. But she's a trooper, your mom, you know? She's a fighter. She's got to prove something, too, that Craig Montgomery could not bring her down.
Paul: Hm, well that's the other problem - Montgomery.
Rose: You just say the word, and I am there. Worldwide, B.R.O., if we team up, Montgomery doesn't stand a chance.
Rose: Now, where I come from, when you get in trouble, you call your friends.
Paul: Look, Rose, I appreciate -
Rose: Ah, ah, I'm not just bein' nice here. B.R.O. owns a lot of Worldwide stock.
Paul: Yeah, I haven't forgotten.
Rose: We just don't want it floatin' around out there. You know? I mean, I trust you. But Montgomery? And whoever Montgomery sells it to?
Paul: Look, look, I wish I could help you. It's just bad timing.
Rose: You worried about your ma?
Paul: Yeah.
Rose: That is one of your nicest qualities, you know? Most guys would have been out of town. You're a mensch.
Paul: Yeah, well, it's also problematic.
Rose: Now, I got a dictionary back home, leather binding and all that, that's one of those $5 words that nobody really knows what it means.
Paul: It means I can't really go into it right now. It's that, I don't really understand it. You see, I - I have this idea that - it's my father. He never gave a damn about anybody. And obviously, I don't want to be like that. But at the same time, what if I'm making a mistake?
Rose: It's too close. I mean, it's your ma. Of course it's too close. But you know what, if Barbara, if she was in the driver's seat right now, she'd be going after Craig with both guns a blazin', 'cause she's a fighter, you know, she's tough.
Paul: I hope so. Montgomery's suing us.
Rose: For what?
Paul: Conspiracy to commit libel, defamation of character.
Rose: Ah, oh wow, he doesn't miss a beat, does he? That creep.
Paul: That's why we can't go at him right now, 'cause it'll feed right into the lawsuit.
Rose: Which could drag on forever. Unless it was thrown out.
Paul: Well, I'm working on it.
Rose: Oh, no, no, no. We're workin' on it.
Rose: Now you see how this works? You, me, and a big problem that just got smaller.
Paul: Rose, if you can find a way to derail Craig, I would not only back Worldwide, I would marry Lucinda.
Paul: Oh, wow.
Paul: Yes I would.
Rose: No, you're not her type.
Paul: Yeah, well, that's the story of my life.
Rose: Oh, I'm sure. Yeah, cry me a river. Rich, handsome, smart? I'm sure you had a million girls lined up from wherever you came from.
Paul: And yet, here I am.
Rose: Me, too. Oh, "Operation Derail Craig" is on. That's good.
Paul: Well, Rose, look, I don't know about this. 'Cause if you keep coming through and bailing me out like this, I'm going to have to find a better way than flowers to thank, because -
Rose: Oh, the flowers - oh my, that's why I came here to thank you for the flowers. I've been rumblin' off my mouth like a jukebox. They're beautiful. Thank you so much. I mean, they're like this creamy white, beautiful - flowers. How'd you know I loved roses?
Paul: I don't know, Rose? It was difficult.
Rose: Yeah, right. Yeah, yeah, you laugh all you want. I had this guy one time, he filled my entire apartment with birds of paradise. That's an ugly flower. Looks like it's going to bite you every time you turn around.
Paul: Yeah, well, Rose, look - I still want to take you out for your birthday dinner.
Rose: Oh. I thought you were just bein' polite, you know, like, "we'll do lunch."
Paul: No, no, no. I - I wrote it down. I signed it.
Rose: Yes you did, on that nice, beautiful card. (Rose remembers the card she found on Lucinda's desk the card that Craig sent with the poisoned chocolates for Lucinda.) Ah, yes, the poisoned chocolates.
Paul: I wouldn't have written it if I hadn't meant it.
Rose: Oh, I know, but there is somebody who would write just about anything and not give a hoot. Can you walk me back to my car? That guard at the gate has been giving me the hairy eyeball.
Paul: Okay. I'll introduce you.
Rose: And you know what, and make reservations at someplace nice, 'cause if my hunch pays off, we're gonna have a lot to celebrate.
Paul: All right.
Business (and a little more) - 8.30.01
Paul: Wow. Rose, you - you look great.
Rose: Oh, thank you.
Paul: Would you like a drink? We have a few minutes before they seat us in the dining room.
Rose: You know what? I'm going to skip that drink until we discuss a little business.
Paul: Business?
Rose: Mm-hmm.
Paul: No, Rose, this is supposed to be your thank you / birthday dinner.
Rose: Oh, I know, I know. I hope it doesn't set you back too much, because once you hear what I have to say, you're gonna owe me another one.
Paul: Hasn't Lucinda taught you anything? You always wait till after the entree to talk business, even at a business dinner.
Rose: Really? Lucinda says dessert. You know? Something sweet, makes the bitter pill easier to swallow.
Paul: Well, she should know.
Rose: Yes.
Paul: All right. So what deals have you been masterminding since I saw you yesterday?
Rose: I had a very long talk - very long talk with Craig Montgomery, dropping the suit against you and your mom. He is. Mm-hmm.
Paul: Are you serious?
Rose: You're serious enough for both of us. Is this how you react when you get good news?
Paul: No, Rose, I'm sorry. It's just hard to believe. When he came over to the house, he was so cocky when he was terrorizing my - how do you do it?
Rose: Well, I just reminded him of some family obligations that he'd forgotten about. And I had something sweet up my sleeve - for dessert.
Paul: I bet you did.
Rose: Uh-huh.
Paul: Rose - you continue to amaze me.
Rose: Oh. Well, while you're sitting there still amazed, I need you to remember what we talked about. I need your guarantee, Paul. You gotta stop Craig from using and abusing those Worldwide stock. And you gotta protect Lucinda before she loses her company.
Rose: Thank you. Now, remember what you said that you'd marry - marry Lucinda if she made that lawsuit go away.
Paul: Ooh, that's right. Lucinda.
Rose: Uh-huh.
Paul: I guess I better have my tux pressed, huh?
Rose: Ah, hold that thought. I got a much better idea really. Lucinda's got a big Worldwide board meeting coming up. And she's got two big problems. What Craig did to her at the last board meeting and what he's gonna do to her at this board meeting.
Paul: Why, do you think the shareholders have lost confidence?
Rose: Probably. It's not her fault. I mean, because of Craig she's seein' flying pigs in the box of chocolates. Now, he can do even worse to her.
Paul: Yeah. Because now he owns enough Worldwide stock that he could put her out of her CEO seat for good.
Rose: That's right. And he doesn't need a box of chocolates to do that. Look, you and your mom, you gotta get that stock back.
Paul: That could be a tall order, Rose.
Rose: But he bought it with B.R.O. money without talkin' to your ma first, right?
Paul: Yeah, but he still controls the shares. At this point, only an arbitration can decide if he's entitled to them.
Rose: Well, what are you waiting for? Come on, you got to do this. You have to make sure that your mom gets that stock back.
Paul: Well, she does have a case. Craig did sign the pre-nup.
Rose: Oh, which entitles Mr. Wonderful to nothing, I hope?
Paul: Yeah, nothing. Not a dime, which is exactly what he deserves.
Rose: Touche. So? Do we have a deal?
Paul: Well, we'll see what we can do. We'll see if we can get those shares back, okay? Who knows, down the road, we may even sell them back to Lucinda if she still wants them.
Rose: It's really nice doing business with you, Paul Ryan.
Paul: You know something, Rose? I was just thinking the same thing about you.
Paul: Hope you like it. Haven't had Bellini since Harry's Bar in Venice.
Rose: Ah! Venice. Is it anything like Harry's Bar in Newark? You see, I haven't been outside the good ol' USA ever, so -
Paul: Well, Worldwide has offices everywhere. So soon, you'll be a world-traveling businesswoman.
Rose: Oh. Hmm. After - after I take down Craig Montgomery enterprises.
Paul: Rose?
Rose: Hmm?
Paul: Are we gonna talk business all night?
Rose: Well, I learned something very important in kindergarten. If you want something, you speak up, you know? I need a crayon. I need a cookie. I need to save Worldwide. It's my same M.O.
Paul: You've always been a woman with needs.
Rose: Oh, yeah.
Paul: But you're not needy. You know? You're honest and you're to the point and that's what I like. It's refreshing.
Rose: Like a cold shower, refreshing.
Paul: No, that's not what I said. I said it's refreshing. Ever since I got into town, you have always been there for me. If I needed cab fare to the airport or nailing Craig in court or - now, you've somehow gotten him to drop this lawsuit. I said it once, and I'm gonna say it again - you're my guardian angel.
Rose: Geez. I'm finally living up to my family name - D'Angelo. Surprise!
Paul: Why is that a surprise? You look like an angel.
Rose: Well, anytime you need me to slap on a couple of wings and do a good deed, I'll do it. Or a bad deed, but you have to beg.
Paul: Now, that is what I like - an all-purpose angel.
Rose: I like you, too.
Paul: I know.
Rose: I'm obvious, aren't I? Yes, that's subtle and - I guess it's been a really long time since I had a nice night out with a nice guy and - I'm not an angel.
Paul: I'm not, either.
Rose: So now what do we do that I've made a complete fool out of myself? Yay!
Paul: Well, how about we celebrate your birthday, huh?
Rose: Okay!
Paul: The night is young. We have finished talking about business. And we're getting ready to have a wonderful dinner. Let's call this our first official date.
Paul: I just had to say that, didn't I?
Rose: What?
Paul: Oh, about this being our first official date. Look, I was just - I was trying to be direct and all that. But I just realized that maybe I'm assuming a lot. Maybe you live with someone or -
Rose: Oh, yes. Joe. Joe D'Angelo, my pop. And Emma. Wee a real threesome. Very racy out at that farm, you know? Very racy.
Paul: So what? No serenades by anybody on your screened-in porch?
Rose: Oh, no. Skunk ambles by once in a while. But, no, nobody at all. Nobody lately. Nobody.
Paul: That's hard to believe. Beautiful girl like you, I'd think you'd have every available guy for miles lined up, knocking your door down.
Rose: You'd think that. Hmm.
Paul: So, no serious involvements since you've been in Oakdale?
Rose: Well, I didn't say that. There was a guy last year, but I wouldn't call him available.
Paul: Why? This guy was married? (imitating mafia man) oh, that stinkin' bum! That stinkin' bum! You let me know who he is. I'll break his thumbs for him, all right? I'll teach him how to swim with a cinder block tied to his foot! Capisce?
Rose: Oh, my. You sound just like my pop. Scary. Don't do that anymore.
Paul: All right. Okay, so this guy - this married guy - did you love him?
Rose: Yeah. I did love him. And I thought, for a while there, that he loved me. But then his wife came back in town, and it all became very crystal clear, everything that was fuzzy. What was very clear was that he belonged with his wife, and I was just kidding myself.
Paul: Are you still in love with him?
Rose: Oh, yeah. I love him. I do. But not like I did back then. Because the woman that he's married to is - I'm very close with her. And I'm happy for them.
Paul: You don't seem happy.
Rose: Well, something terrible just happened recently and -
Paul: What?
Rose: Well, there was this accident, this boat accident. And this wonderful man and his wonderful son are presumed dead, they're missing. And I pray every night that they're not dead, but - what am I doing here? Why did you have to ask me such a simple question?
Paul: Rose, I'm not a man who is scared by a few tears.
Rose: Thank you.
Paul: Look, I hope you don't think I'm prying, but this guy - this married guy you're talking about - it's Holden Snyder, right?
Rose: Oh! Great. Nothing like living in a three-ring fishbowl.
Paul: Sorry. I sort of knew.
Rose: You knew? You let me babble on like this? Some talk-show trash? "I love my sister's husband." All I need is some audience telling me how disgusting I am. You probably think I'm pretty disgusting yourself.
Paul: No. That's not what I was thinking at all.
Rose: Sorry about your hankie. It's kind of covered with mascara.
(Paul laughs)
Paul: It's no problem. Give my cleaning lady something to talk about.
Rose: You know what I'm gonna do when I get home tonight? I'm gonna write a book about the things you don't do on a first date. Rule number one, you never tell your new guy the worst thing you ever did in your life, especially if it's a sob story and you slobber all over his handkerchief. Look, if you wanna take a rain check, I understand.
Paul: Why? It stopped raining.
Maitre D': Your table is ready, sir. Sorry you had to wait so long.
Paul: Oh, no problem. Thank you.
Maitre D': Right this way.
Paul: Shall we?
Surprise Birthday Party (Atlantic City Style) - 8.31.01
Paul: I'd love to know what you were thinking that made the corner of your mouth do that.
Rose: I'll tell you mine if you tell me yours.
Paul: Okay. Fair enough. Go ahead.
Rose: Oh, no. No, no, no. You first.
Paul: Oh, me? Oh, okay. Well, that's easy. I was thinking that of all the places in the world to be - and I've been to a few - I'm exactly where I want to be tonight.
Rose: With me? Is that unusual for you, to be where you want to be?
Paul: Well, the last time I felt like this was when I lived in Paris.
Rose: Hmm.
Paul: So here's to you, Rose. "L'ange gardien."
Rose: Oh, back to that whole guardian angel thing again? Oh. That was gonna be my thing that I was going to say, that I really like being somebody's angel.
Paul: So here's to you, to the angel on her birthday.
Rose: Oh, thank you. Oh, and not one mention of a number. That's very classy of you. Very classy.
Paul: Well, if I didn't already know your twin sister, I would think you were jail-bait.
Rose: Oh, isn't that nice? Oh, as my girlfriend always used to say, "you're only as old as your fake I.D."
Paul: And I'd take it this friend is not from Oakdale, right?
Rose: Oh, no. Mitzi, a Jersey pearl, that one. I feel like I've known her as far back as I can remember.
Paul: I can see it now. Babies together, right?
Rose: More like Jersey babes, but I won't bore you with the details.
Paul: Oh, no, no, no. I want to hear all the details. I want to hear about all of your life before you found Lily.
Rose: Well, before Lily, my life was colorful.
Mitzi (across the room): Get everybody over to the Lakeview Towers. I found the birthday girl.
Rose: I don't know. My mom always says it's bad luck to tell all of your secrets in one night.
Paul: Well, everything about life before Oakdale can't be secret.
Rose: I already told you about being in love with Holden. I mean, that's - that's a major thing. And I will tell you the story of my life later, like ten years later, okay? I just want to talk about Paris, you know?
Paul: Ah. Oh, Paris.
Rose: Paris.
Mitzi: Happy birthday, Rosie!
Rose: Oh - oh, my gosh! Oh, my gosh! Oh -
Mitzi: Surprised ya, huh?
Rose: Yeah. I was just - I was just talking about you, just now.
Mitzi: Look at her. Not much can tie up rose's tongue. I remembered your real birthday from last year. You were so d last year with that Holden given you the boot and all. I decided to come all the way back to Jokedale - just kidding - I came all the way back to make sure you had a birthday you'd never forget. Say something, Rose!
Rose: I'm - I'm just in shock, you know? In, like, a good way shock. It's just my heart is not catching up with everything else, that's all. This is my date, Paul Ryan. This is Mitzi.
Mitzi: Mitzi Matters. Pleased to make your acquaintance.
Paul: It's a pleasure to meet you, Mitzi, and you have great timing. She was just talking about you.
Rose: I know, I was.
Mitzi: Nothing too bad, I hope.
Rose: No.
Mitzi: Still got the goods, don't you, Rose?
Rose: So how did you track me down here, Mitz?
Mitzi: This one does not make it easy, I'll tell ya'. First, we checked all the hot spots in town - both of them. Then, we fanned out, and guess who got lucky, in a manner of speaking?
Rose: We? Who's we?
Mitzi: Come on in!
Rose: Oh!
Showgirl #3: Happy birthday!
Rose: Gosh. This is amazing.
Showgirl #1: The line hasn't been the same since you stopped kickin' it! Happy birthday.
Showgirl #2: Look at you! I haven't seen you in a place this quiet since Lenny B fell down.
Showgirl #3: Candi, this ain't the boom-boom room. Rose has got class now. Happy birthday, sweetie.
Make-up Person: Girlfriend, don't tell me you forgot to put on lashes before you left Jersey?
Rose: Well -
Make-up Person: I'm just kidding. You look gorgeous.
Costume Designer: Oh, and your ensemble, simply stunning. You always had great, Rose, great taste.
Rose: Oh, thank you.
High roller #1: You haven't forgotten "Uncle Ray," have ya'? Lay one right there.
Rose: Oh, it's so good to - hey, how could I forget Ray?
High Roller #2: High Rollin' Rosie! How about a squeeze for old time's sake?
Mitzi: Oh, enough, you! Enough. And Rosie, you remember Hank.
Rose: Hey.
Hank: Hey, baby. How are you?
Rose: Good, good.
Mitzi: And of course, Bruno. Bruno's the reason we're all here.
(laughter)
Mitzi: So, since Rose wasn't coming back to Atlantic City, we brought a little of Atlantic City to Rose! (cheers) get ready, D'Angelo. It's gonna be a hell of a party!
Rose: I cannot believe that Bruno flew all of you here, you know.
Mitzi: Nothin' but the best for our Rosie, right guys?
All: Right.
Mitzi: After what you went through last year, you look like yourself again, Rose. All that lying and pretending to be Lily didn't do a thing for your complexion.
Rose: Well, would you just zip it, you know? It's water under the bridge, okay? We'll just talk about right now. And all of this, it's just - it's too much.
Mitzi: You deserve it.
Rose: Aw.
Mitzi: You front like a tough cookie, Rose, but I know you were hurtin' last year. Rose got her heart broke real bad, did she tell you?
Paul: Holden?
Mitzi: Yeah. The poor baby. She was so lonely here. Back then, not one person in this one-horse town got what a gem this one is. Looks, sense of humor, talent - she's got it all. (cheers) What a dancer, right?
Paul: Actually - actually, I've never had the privilege to see Rose dance.
Mitzi: Not to worry, big guy. What do they say, "ask, and it shall be given to you"?
Paul: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait, wait. Tell me, tell me, tell me.
Rose: I've got to talk to my date for a second. Would you please?
Paul: Rose, your friends are crazy about you.
Rose: Oh, no, they're just plain crazy. Look, I love them, but you've got to take everything that Mitzi says with a grain of salt, please.
Paul: No, she's great. She throws one heck of a surprise party.
Rose: Yeah, she does do that, you know. And I'm - I'm just gonna call it a night. And that Maitre'd, he's like giving me the hairy eyeball. He's gonna blow a gasket.
Paul: Forget him. You've got a table full of presents here, you know.
Rose: All right. I'm opening one present. I'm taking the rest of them, and I'm putting them in a bag, and I'm gonna head out of here. You can head out of here, too, you know. And I'll call you in the morning, okay? You can just -
Paul: No way. I wouldn't miss this party for the world.
Rose: Are you sure about that?
Mitzi: Yoo-hoo! Over here!
(Mitzi calls over a man who has just walked into the dining room.)
Maitre'd: No, sir. A jacket is required.
Stripper: Jacket? What's the point? Just gonna take it off anyway.
Mitzi: That's right. Hey, the entertainment's here, girls. Check him out! Yee-haw!
Rose: Excuse me, excuse me, excuse me. Um - hey, hey! Hey, excuse me. Um - excuse me. We're not going to be needing your, uh - services tonight. So, why don't you just and I'm sure that we'll take care of you, make sure you get paid and we'll even throw you a little extras. So you're not leaving? All right. Well, thanks anyway. Okay. You've gotta stop this! You've gotta stop this, because this is not gonna be pretty. It's going to be ugly.
Paul: Well, I don't think Mitzi would agree with you. Look, Rose, your friends obviously want you to have a good time on your birthday. Okay? I mean, they've gone out of their way.
Rose: Yeah, there's good time - you know, good time. And then there's Oakdale good time. The people that were having dinner here when we got here are gone. They left their hundred-dollar plates, because they were looking for a buffet, not a guy in the buff. Please -
Paul: Rose, relax.
Mitzi: C'mon, you two. We've got a prime seat for the birthday girl, right there. (cheers)
(laughter and screams as the stripper puts on a show for Rose)
Mitzi: Help him out. Come on. He needs help. (laughter)
Rose: Oh, that was great oh, that was so - so -
Paul: Did you have fun?
Rose: Yeah, great! You know, guys, I should open up some presents, 'cause I never could resist a pretty package.
Make-up person: We noticed, girlfriend. (laughter)
Paul: Eh, yeah. Rose, your friends really love you to death.
Rose: Yeah. They love me, but - to death. Yes, they do. And I love them, but it's my death we're talkin' about here, you know? And Mitzi - I love 'em, but I could use a little warning.
Mitzi: Open this one first, Rose.
Rose: Oh.
Mitzi: I bet it's a diamond garter.
Rose: Oh, if it is - if it is, I'm - I'll - I'm gonna wear it on my wrist. Okay?
Mitzi: Ooh. Who's it from?
Paul: Happy birthday. It's - it's an angel.
Rose: Oh, you keep up with all this guardian angel stuff, I'm gonna sprout wings.
Showgirl #2: Share the wealth, Rosie.
Rose: Pretty. (Crowd aws at the charm bracelet with an angel.)
High Roller #2: Such a nice guy.
Rose: I do. I love it.
Mitzi: Open the rest. Costumer: In honor -
Paul: Whoa. Aw.
Costumer: - Of all the years I've stitched you into magnificence! (cheers)
Rose: Oh, I can't. I can't.
High Roller #1: Come on. Come on. Come on.
Costumer: That's just what she said the first time she put it on. (laughter)
High Roller #2: Yeah, whoo!
Mitzi: Then she put it on, and it was "come to mama." Oh, ladies and gentlemen, Atlantic City Rose is struttin' again!
Rose: I can't. I can't. I gotta - I gotta draw the line somewhere, guys.
Paul: Come on, Rose. Come on, Rose.
Mitzi: Look, you wanna see the girl dance, right?
Paul: Oh. Oh, yeah. But it's really up to the birthday girl.
High Roller #1: Aw, come on, Rose. Rose, come on. Come on, please, Rose.
Mitzi: Just once. Just one last time, Rose.
High roller #1: Come on.
Rose: You guys are such cut-ups. Nobody can move in these things. You know that.
Mitzi: Yeah, nobody but Rose, about a hundred times - look, Rose could dress up a feather better than anybody. Look, come on. Come on, rose. Let's go. Get in line, Rose. You make way. Okay, ya ready? And a one, and a two -
Rose: No, I can't because I don't remember anything. I don't remember any of the steps.
Mitzi: Like riding a bicycle, baby. Isn't that what she always told you guys after every vacation?
All: Absolutely.
Mitzi: Dance captain this one. Okay. (clears throat) ladies and gentlemen, straight from the Atlantic City Boardwalk, it's Rose D'Angelo and the Caliente kick line! (Cheers)
High Roller #1: Come on, Rosie.
Mitzi: And a one, and a two, and a one, two, three -
Rose: No, I can't. I - I (Rose runs out of the dining room.)
Mitzi: Rosie - Rose -
High Roller #2: What? What?
Mitzi: Where are ya going?
Paul: Mitzi, I'll - I'll see what's wrong with her. Everybody, just - yeah, okay.