Xander (shelving books): I'm not enjoying this.
Giles: Well, shelve them correctly and we can finish.
Xander: I don't get your crazy system.
Giles: System? It's called the alphabet.
Xander: Huh, would you look at that?

Harmony: Is Antonio Banderas a vampire?
Spike: No.
Harmony: Oh. Can I make him a vampire?
Spike: No. Wait, on second thought, yeah, go do that. Take your time. Do Melanie and the kids as well.

Xander: "Whoa, Giles has a TV. Everybody, Giles has a TV! He's shallow like us."

Willow: He's a poophead.
Buffy: Am I repulsive? If there was something repulsive about me, you'd tell me, right?
Willow: I'm your friend. I would call you repulsive in a second.
Buffy: Maybe Parker and I could still work it out. Do you think that we could still work it out?
Willow: I think you're missing something about the whole poophead principle.

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