THE HISTORY OF STYRAMEX
STYRAMEX was spawned from the Almighty JESUS CHRYSLER, the holiest of all vehicles. When driving through
Tamulipas, Mexico, this Miracle Machine of Houston crashed head on into a factory owned by the company called FABRICA STYROFOAM, which made clothing out of styrofoam.
The plant exploded in a nuclear blast (because it was powered by a fusion reactor). The driver of the JESUS CHRYSLER was none other than Robb Zipp. The blast was so great, that it
catapulted Zipp and the JESUS CHRYSLER all the way to Kokomo, Indiana to never be seen or heard from again. As a result of this HORRIBLE incident, three sweat shop workers of FABRICA STYROFOAM
(Johan, Russell, and Chris, who were illegal immigrants from Houston, TX) mutated after being covered in radioactive molten styrofoam. The were also given super-human powers!!! Johan held aloft his mighty instrument, and
became JOHAN THE CONQUEROR, the official Guit-Jammer & Flow-Buster for the new group, STYRAMEX. (They named the band STYRAMEX because, well they worked at a styrofoam company in Mexico...duh..) Following by his side, are Russell (who became
®USSELL™ THE BASS-WHACKER with legendary skillz on the 5-string electric bass gutbucket) and Chris (who became BEATMASTER CHRIS C. with super-human drum-beatin' abilities). Together they fight for truth, justice, and your mom!