Captain Knockers

and the

Islamic Goat Herders of Death

based on a true story

Chapter Five: The Shit-storm of Death

"Wake up now Captain!" screamed Rear Admiral Stan. "Theres a storm approaching.... but its a strange brown colour..."

Captain Knockers knew just what was going on.... it was a SHITSTORM.... a SHITSTORM OF DEATH!!!!!

Captain Knockers had experienced one of these once as a child, doing his work experience as a pirate. It was in just about the same spot too... the coast of the small African country Djbouti. In the last Shit-storm of death all the crew but 2 were lost.

A shit-storm isnt just like any other storm. It comes about due to the public health infrastructure in Djbouti. The Minister for Public Health finds it amusing when people have explosive diarrhoea, so made laws banning the cure of cholera entering the country. As a result, people contract cholera from drinking the water and after eating their children develope a severe case of the runs. And its very runny. So runny, in fact, that it evaporates, forming clouds of faeces and small diarrhoea droplets in the air. After a while the barometric pressure rises, causing a mega-cyclone of death, which blows around the atmospheric faeces and also contains cow manure which it sucks off the ground.

And theres only one way to stop it!!!.....

INSERT A CRUNCHY APRICOT MUESLI BAR UP THE MINISTER FOR PUBLIC HEALTH'S ANUS!!!!

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