"....you might be
a Viking..."
"If bartenders keep asking you, "What's mead?" you
might be a Viking.
If you rate your new cars in oarpower instead of horsepower, you
mightbe aViking.
If a strange, very big read headed man shows up for dinner and
eats you
outof house and home, you might be a Viking.
If you consider beer and herring a gourmet meal, you might be a
Viking.
If you think that a Lutheran is nothing more than a quick source
ofmoney,you might be a Viking.
If your new girlfriend is dismayed to find that you've given a
personalnameto each one of your kitchen knives,
you might be a Viking.
If you think that attacking and looting smal towns is a good way to meet people,
you might be a Viking.
If, after reciting your family lineage and history, you find that
yourfriends all left two hours ago,
you might be a Viking.
If yo think that Helga, Gertruda and Snotra are really very prettynames for
girls, you might be a Viking.
If the best thing you can say about France is that you left most
of it standing, you might be a Viking.
If you've changed your name from Joe Schmit to Hralfnkel
Niflgrimsson,youare probably a Viking.
If modern day pirace off the Florida coast sounds to you like a
goodcareeropportunity....
If you think that Old Norse is an easy-to-learn, attractive and
user-friendly language, you might be a Viking.
If your idea of heavy spices are salt and pepper, you might be a
Viking.
If you wave a spear over the visiting basketball team and offer
their soulsto Odinn, you might be a Viking.
If you think that a trip to Iowa is an exotic adventure, you
might be a very brave Viking.
If you finish you European vacation with more money than when you
started,you might very well be a Viking.
If a strange, one-handed man shows up at your house, drinks all
your beer,
pronounces sentence on your fundamentalist neighbor, points out
all the legal inaccuracies
of the latest "NYPD Blues" and leaves a huge wolf
chained to your new Ford Mustang, you might be a Viking
(Thanks to Emk vitki Atrith Arisson)
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