The slippery fellow was hard at work spreading rumours by February. He announced that he was planning an album consisting of reworked versions of his early 60's songs. The world would be given a second chance to notice his raw fantisticulsim. He also announced the second album in the Nathan Adler series would be coming. He was 327 albums behind, but nothing would stop him continuing this work. Nothing that is, except rabid bouts of apathy.
'Exhuming Mr Rice' was retitled 'Mr Rice's Secret' and premiered in a shed at Barry's place. It was up against some stiff competition as 'Mr Noodle's Secret' was due out in April, to be followed soon after by 'The Dark World of Mr Asparagus'.
By the end of February Iman had news for us all. She had a bun in the oven. David was responsible for putting the bun there. It would be cooked and ready to come out in August. Here was the proof that they had indeed 'done it', Iman providing the eggs and flour, David putting in some milk and stirring it all about. A bit of suger, a dollup of chocolate, a shake here, a dab there, a poke, a prod, a squeeze and a pinch, a slap and a rub and presto.
Iman - 'I said to him, "Look what you went and did. Putting your stuff everywhere and poking your thing all over the place." He was looking at me as if to say "woops" and I just did my Somalian "WEEAAARRRG!" and ran out the house.'
On March 19th David interviewed himself in the New York Times. It ended badly with David walking out on himself and vowing to never speak to himself again. A hairy legal situation followed when he slapped himself with a restraining order whereby he had to stay at least 500 feet from himself.
The nearly concert free man was at the Roseland Ballroom on June 16th. Performing with Earl Slick on lead guitar, Mark Plati on bass and guitar, Gail Ann Dorsey on bass and vocals and clarinet, Sterling Campbell on drums and Mike Garson on piano and keyboards. His hair was long and wavy, he didn't need a shavey, some fans were from the navy, to see this man called Davey.
For the June 17th concert he did something different, which was not show up. The official story was that he had laryngitis, but it just so happened that this was the day Superman stopped a nuclear holocaust by diverting a missile heading for the Kremlin. Co-incidence? Why did this man disappear North every Christmas? Could it be? Do you ever see David Bowie and Jesus Christ in the same room together? Can there be any doubt?
Bowie rounded this all out by being the headline act on the last day of the Glastonbury 2000 festival with the musicians mentioned above. Three concerts in the same year. How did he do it?
But that wasn't all, he also appeared on the TFI Friday show on June 23rd and performed 4 songs. Four of them! The shows producers were begging him to stop after three, they were fearful he was going to kill himself. But he went on and did four much to the amazement of a couple of people.
Yet he wasn't done yet! A special performance for BBC Radio Theatre was recorded on June 27th for airing later in the year when it got musty. Gail Ann Dorsey confided to reporters that she thought the man was pushing himself too hard and should stop at four concerts.
But no! After only a months rest, on June 24th, He appeared at the Yahoo! Internet Life Music Awards at Studio 54 in New York as the top billed performer. The other performers had average bills, but David's was top. He performed a staggering two songs, Wild is the Wind and LIfe on Mars?, before taking out the Best Artist Web Site Award. The award did not however 'ask David up for a cup of coffee' as has been rumoured in the press.
On August 15th Iman pushed it out. Alexandria Zahra Jones was born at 5:06 am and weighed 3.3kg. Her cries were measured at 101.3 dB and the doctor smacked her bottom by applying a force of 210N at an impulse of 750 Ns. When David witnessed the birth he ran at a speed of 6.7m/s screaming at 117dB. The temperature outside was 31.3 degrees C and the pressure was 1010 KPa. The cord was cut 21.8 cm from what would be the bellybutton.
'Bowie at the Beeb' was a collection of recordings made at the BBC in the late 60's and early 70's. When released in September it made number 7 in the UK charts giving him another top 10 without having to do squat. David considered putting together 'Bowie at the Bank', a collection of recordings made of David laughing with his Swiss bank manager, but this was turned down.
Also in September, on the 13th, 'Live and Well' was sent to Bowienet members. 'Live and Well' was a collection of material from the Earthling tours designed by Bowienet members themselves. Non-Bowienet members were sent a dead fish and threatening letter.
The fall 2000 edition of Bust featured Iman interviewing David about her 'bigguns'.
'Zoolander' was the film in which David's only film role was made in 2000. He played himself refereeing a 'walk-off' between two male fashion stars. It went well with David's new policy of '10 minutes work per month' which he wanted to stick to.
An interview in New Musical Express gives us an idea of where he was at in his career in October :
NME - So your plans for the future? What have you been up to?
David Bowie - I've nearly finished work on this album that is so good it will make you shit. It's called TOY and has my old songs from the 60's on it.
NME - The crap ones? Weren't they recently voted the worst songs of the century in a Rolling Stone poll?
David Bowie - I...err...it's really...Lisa Germano appears on it, playing recorder, violin, mandolin and accordian. Really special stuff.
NME - Lisa Germano? She hasn't really done anything for 30 years has she? Why Lisa?
David Bowie - She went...I've got...when we...I feel tired. Sleepy time.
David would go on to record The Who's 'Pictures of Lily' for an album of Who covers late that month. As well as presenting a Designer of the Year award to Stella McCartney that was all before he took a nap and Iman fed him some strained soup. He was spotted here and there wandering around the place.
Was this the end of the once all powerful rock star? Time would tell.