STAR MAKER
Episode 1 – A Nightmare To Remember
Scene: The laboratory of Cortex Castle
Music: Eminem – “Stan” (Chorus twice)
There was rain and a thunderstorm seen from through the window, and these words appear on the screen…
“Are dreams true reality or are they just wishes from the heart?
“Usually we can’t remember our dreams, although we can remember seeing them.
“But in very few occasions something from out of the ordinary happens…”
(The camera moves to the right)
As we move away from the window we see Dr. Neo Cortex creating some sort of liqueur, giving off a bright red gas…
(The camera zooms through his eyes and then blends in to a background of outer space, zooming past every planet imaginable. As this happens the logo and then the opening credits run alongside Sonique – “It Feels So Good”. When the song finishes the camera is focused on a meteorite.)
The lone meteorite, giving off a long trail of smoke behind it, started to zoom as far as the speed of sound and right at planet Earth, breaking through the stratosphere and landing on top of Skull Rock.
(Scene changes back to the lab. Music changes – Darude – “Sandstorm”)
The blast caused Cortex to accidentally drop his potion onto the floor, breaking the test tube and all contents spilling away from it.
Cortex: (sighs angrily) Another couple of months’ work wasted… (heads towards the window) And it’s all thanks to… (looks out of the window and gasps)
(Scene changes back to Skull Rock)
The meteorite started to budge, and out from one of the craters came Tiko. He looked around from one direction to another repeatedly and then saw the Powers of the Four Seasons on the rock. He was about to pick them up…
(Scene changes to deep in the turtle woods. Sound effect – thunderclap)
At the same time Cortex was seen dashing through the dangers of the woods in a black anorak and his laser in his hand. The storm grew wilder as he got closer to his target…
(Music stops. The scene changes back to Skull Rock.)
Tiko tried to pull out the Powers, but it seemed like they were glued in. Then he got out a hammer and a chisel and when he was about to carve them out of the rock Cortex finally arrived…
Cortex: What in the world do you think you’re doing?
Tiko: Ah, my brat for a brother – how nice to see you… NOT! And I bet you don’t understand my next plan…
Cortex: (faintly) Here we go again…
[Music changes – Planet Perfecto – “Bullet In The Gun” (Instrumental)]
Suddenly lightning struck at the rock, causing the part with the Powers in to break off and smash on to the floor. Then Tiko grabbed them.
Tiko: (laughs) I AM NOW THE SUPREME ONE!!!!!
Lightning struck again, this time on Tiko.
Cortex: The supreme one? Ha! Lightning can clean you… out… what the…?
The lightning stopped, and Tiko didn’t even get hurt.
Tiko: I’M STRONGER!
Cortex: (stunned) Unbelievable…
Tiko: Now it’s time for you to finally get down to hell for good!
Tiko then charged towards Cortex like a sayian, knocking him over.
Tiko: Sucker!
Cortex: (gets up) You may be speedy… (loads his laser) …but this has been tried and tested, and can make an instant kill almost every time!
Tiko: Prove it, weak ass!
Cortex then started firing his laser at Tiko, but all the bullets bounced off him. Sooner enough, all bullets were fired and he was all in one piece.
Tiko: (laughs vilely) You can never beat me!
He fires a strong fireball from the palms of his hands, causing his opposition to touch the floor.
Tiko: (rushes up to his target) You make a disgraceful living being, I can tell ya that now!
Cortex: (suffering pain) Ah… (thinks) I think I’m… paralysed…
Tiko stole Moe’s stolen blade off him, raised it high and was about to slash his target in two…
*********************************************
Episode 2 – Pillow Talk
Scene: The bedroom of Cortex Castle
As the part begins an alarm clock on a small table started to ring madly, causing Cortex, alive and well believe it or not, to deactivate it.
[Music starts – Red Hot Chilli Peppers – “Under The Bridge” (Intro)]
He sat up revealing himself in tartan pyjamas, and looked down, with visions of the nightmare in his mind. There was no sound large enough to disturb it – the only sounds that can be heard are the light snores of Private Boron in a very loose hammock on the other side of the room and a gale force from an open window. Immediately he went up towards it to close it, but upon first sight he gasped.
(Music changes – Paul Van Dyk – “For An Angel”)
A black figure was seen zooming across the sky and straight towards him. Immediately he got out a pair of binoculars but just as when he looked through them, he took cover under the bed sheet. Then a split second later the figure touched down into the room saiyan-style and drew out its sword. He came out from under the bed sheet and then grabbed Moe’s stolen blade on the bedside cabinet and blocked the attack.
(Music stops)
Cortex: Don’t hurt me! I’m innocent!
(The assassin sounds like Robin from “The Muppet Show”)
Assassin: Oh… (draws his sword back) I’m sorry.
Cortex: It’s all right. Here – sit down.
[Music restarts – Moby – “Why Does My Heart Feel So Bad?” (Red Jerry’s String & Breaks mix, instrumental)]
Both of them sat down on the bed.
Cortex: So why did you attack me in the first place?
Assassin: I’m sorry… I thought you were my dad… but you look nothing like him.
Cortex: Show me a picture of him and I could be able to help you.
The assassin got a photograph out of his pocket and showed it to Cortex. It had the lad when he was younger and his father on it.
Cortex: He looks familiar… (gasps) What am I thinking – that’s Tiko!
Assassin: You knew him?
Cortex: Of course I do – he’s my evil brother!
Assassin: Are you sure? Well to make sure if you’re right what is his nickname?
Cortex: The Cerulean Wizard?
Assassin: And what body part does he have that you don’t?
Cortex: It’s a tail.
Assassin: Mamma mia… (shows his tail from behind him) Then you must be Uncle Neo! WOW!!!!!!! I...
(Music pauses)
Cortex: Quiet… (points at Boron)
Boron looked like he was starting to wake up, but a few seconds later he drifted back to sleep.
Cortex: (faintly) Close…
(Music resumes)
Assassin: It’s a pleasure to meet you. I’m Teejay.
They shake hands.
Teejay: Do you know where he is?
Cortex: One of my friends thinks that he’s controlling the planet Mars, but I think he’s still down here on Earth.
Teejay: There’s only one way to find out – have you ever had a dream with him in it?
Cortex: I don’t think so… except for a nightmare I had last night… why do you ask?
Teejay: Dreams or nightmares with Tiko in it always come true.
Cortex: (gulps and speaks in a high pitched voice) I’m gonna get cut in half!
Teejay: No you’re not – as long as you do something different to what happened to your dream something different will happen. Where was he?
Cortex: He came from outer space in a meteorite and was seen at Skull Rock.
Teejay: Quick! You and Boron get smartened up! I’ll send in the rest of the neighbourhood!
Teejay flew out of the window and Cortex headed towards Boron’s hammock.
ABOUT AN HOUR LATER
[Music changes – Mya – “Case of the Ex” (Instrumental)]
Most of the neighbourhood was seen listening to Teejay about Tiko’s comeback…
Teejay: And that’s what’s going to happen. Come on – we need a plan to stop him!
Crash: Can we just wrap it up in a few easy-to-understand words? I don’t quite get ya.
(Music stops)
Snappy: I can do that! (raps in the rhythm of Eminem – “The Real Slim Shady”)
I’m Snaps Gator, yes I’m Snappy Gator
All you other pretenders just want big spenders
So won’t mean blue Tiko please stay out, please stay out, please stay out…
[Music restarts – Limp Biskit – “Take A Look Around” (Instrumental)]
Cortex: (hits Snappy on the head with his own fist) He said WRAP, not rap!!!
Snappy: (faintly) Sorry… (rubs his forehead and squeals with pain)
Teejay: OK, back to business. What I’m basically saying is that Tiko will be coming back, and we need to stop him from stealing the Powers of…
Crash: I get it now! Count me in – he nearly thrashed me come last time around!
Snappy: I won’t forget that terrifying moment!
Ryane: Send me in – you need all the strength you can get!
Boron jumped up and down madly.
Teejay: I guess you guys are gonna be a big help then…
Cortex: I can’t agree more! I think we have room for a sixth fighter… (turns to Snappy) How about you Snappy?
Snappy: I love to, but sadly Midget’s got the chickenpox, so he’s my first priority.
Rest of the gang: Aaaaaaah…
Monnika: Tell him that I wish him the best of luck to get better.
Snappy: Thanks! And I think you should go with them after your small contribution to help me out…
Monnika: I’m not sure…
Snappy: Come on – think about it – what would have happened if you weren’t here?
Monnika: Let’s see… Tiko might have stolen Christmas from everyone… and if I didn’t retrieve the Power of Spring from Oxide I’m thinking that you had no chance of a resurrection…
Ryane: And you showed your skill to us in that crucial final battle! If it wasn’t for you we could have been toast! Now come on – you could be a big help, like last time around!
Monnika: If that’s your case Raz – I’ll do it!!!
The rest of the gang started cheering on for her.
Crash: Looks like we’re ready to chase him on… er… where is he?
Teejay: Oh… (turns to Cortex) you know your dream… where did he land?
Cortex: He crash-landed in a meteorite at Skull Rock.
Crash: Now we can chase him outta-here! LET’S RIDE!
And our gang of six – Crash, Cortex, Monnika, Ryane, Boron and Teejay – started sprinting towards Skull Rock for the next treat in store…
***************************************
Episode 3 – A New Journey
Scene: About 750 yards away from Skull Rock
Music: Melanie B – “Feels So Good” (Instrumental)
Our heroes were seen dashing through the dark forests before the rock in order to catch Tiko…
Cortex: There’s still one thing in which I don’t understand – the incident happened at nighttime and not during the day. Why are we tracking him down just after sunrise?
Teejay: You can never be too careful – I managed to sense my dad around these parts and I’m thinking that he would be around here somewhere…
Ryane: Remember Teege – not everyone’s perfect – even a superstar fighter like me can cause a slip somewhere!
Monnika: Remember your promise – don’t be too much of a show-off! That’s why I didn’t like you at the start!
Ryane: I know… I can’t help it…
Crash: Ladies, please, let’s not get mad with each other.
Monnika and Ryane: Sorry…
(Music stops)
Cortex: Stop right there… (gets out a pair of binoculars) I think I can see… (gasps)
Crash: What?
Cortex: HE’S COMING BACK!!!
Crash: Is he now? (gets out his bazooka) That punk boy’s gonna be one heck of a sliced piece of bacon right now!!!
They started dashing towards Skull Rock with their weapons out…
AT SKULL ROCK
Crash: OK, so we’re there… now what do we do?
[Music restarts – Papa Rouch – “Last Resort” (Instrumental)]
Voice: (laughs vilely) My next plan is nearby!
Cortex: I’ll see if I can spy on them…
Teejay: Be careful! Remember what happened in your dream…
Cortex: I know… (in a high-pitched voice) I don’t want to get cut in half!
The rest of the gang sighed. He drilled a hole through a nearby rock with his laser very carefully, hid behind it and started spying. The first people he saw were Tiko and his brother Lio.
Tiko: (laughs vilely) Soon, with these Powers in my possession I will have freedom to take over the world!
Lio: It’s just a case of getting them out…
Tiko: Exactly, which is why you’re perfect for the job!
Lio: OK, skipper! The Pinkeye Fiend is coming back in action!
He chucks some pink ooze at the part of the rock with the Powers and in no time at all it broke off and shattered across the floor. Tiko then came and picked the Powers off the floor one by one.
Lio: Do you feel different?
Tiko: I’M STRONGER!!!!!!
He tries to fire a beam of light from his wrists, but nothing came out. He even tried to fly, but he couldn’t even get off the ground.
Cortex: (thinks) This was nothing like my dream at all…
Teejay immediately turned to Cortex angrily, but then Ryane tapped him on the back.
Ryane: (whispers) It was me – I was the one who disabled the Powers!
Teejay: (whispers) Why?
Ryane: (whispers) I didn’t want them to fall in the wrong hands, so they only now work with any magical relic. This seems hard for a bad guy…
Teejay: Oh… (turns to Cortex and whispers) Sorry!
BACK UNDER THE MAIN ROCK
Lio: Any other bright ideas? And why do you need the energy from the Powers so badly?
Tiko: To take over the world, duh!
Lio: Just wondering… now that these powers are worthless…
Tiko: You may be wrong – I’m still taking them to try and unlock the energy from inside them.
Lio: A good idea…
From the hiding place, there was a sneezing sound.
Lio: Oi bro – I’ve found an intruder here!
Tiko: Well no matter what we have the Powers of the Four Seasons in our hands! Lio, you try and find the twerps!
Lio: Aye man!
Sooner enough, Tiko placed a jet pack on his back and flew off with the Powers.
BACK IN HIDING
The crewmembers were facing Crash angrily…
Ryane: What was that for?
Crash: Sorry – I couldn’t help myself.
Monnika: You should have at least held yer nose! But that doesn’t matter right now – we have some Powers to rescue.
Ryane: But we have to fight Lio first! I mean… there is no way we can escape him without a fight!
Teejay: Good point. Looks like we’re on a hard mission here!
The gang came out of hiding and started walking towards Lio…
*********************************************
Episode 4 – Rock Bottom
Scene: Underneath Skull Rock
Music: Outkast – “Ms. Jackson” (Instrumental)
Lio was seen waiting patiently for his enemies to come…
Lio: Ah come out – come out come out wherever you are…
Just then our heroes came straight towards him, walking slowly…
Lio: Ah, it’s about time you brats showed up! And I see you have some new bods on yer side! (faces Monnika) You think you’re blue – black and blue when I finish with you!
Monnika: Actually it would be YOU who would be black and blue because you are so puny you can’t even beat a kid alligator!
Lio: Fair enough… (faces Teejay) And I haven’t seen you since you were a tot – I bet you STILL are as feeble as one! (giggles)
Teejay: Get real, Uncle Lio – I never really WAS that puny anyway!
Lio: (turns to Ryane) And look – what do we have here, eh Ms. Donald Duck?
Ryane: (looks angry) Dare underestimate me or I’ll send you my feel of fire!
Lio: Ooh, look who’s quacking now! (laughs out loud)
Ryane: That’s it! (fires a fireball on Lio’s shirt)
Lio: (screams) MY SHIRT!!!!!!
At this moment his shirt was on fire, causing him to roll around onto the floor and eventually putting the flame out.
Ryane: Now what do you have to say about that?
Lio: My memorabilia… given to me by Olivia Newton John… destroyed… (acts furious) AND IT’S YOU GUYS THAT WILL PAY FOR IT!!!!!
Crash: But we don’t have any money!
Lio: I am meaning a different way…
[Music changes – Roni Size/Reprazent – “Dirty Beats” (Instrumental)]
Immediately he threw a blob of ooze right at each of his opponents, only knocking down Boron, Monnika and Ryane.
Crash: Try and break free guys!
Each of them tried to break out, but a few seconds later they became unconscious.
Crash: (sighs angrily) This is an outrage!
Teejay: I’ll try and cut them free!
Crash: But you don’t have a weapon…
Cortex: That’s when you’re wrong! (turns to Teejay) Show him what you’ve got!
He draws out his sword and slashed it around 360 degrees.
Crash: WICKED! Where did you get it?
Teejay: I’ll tell you guys after the battle. For now I have some work to do!
Teejay rushed towards the rest of the crew members and tried to cut them free with his sword, but…
Crash: Is there… something wrong?
Teejay: (struggling) I can’t squeeze it in!
Cortex: (sighs and turns to Crash) You try and sort out Lio. I’ll do the rest.
Crash: Roger!
As Cortex started heading towards Teejay, Crash got out his bazooka and walked furiously towards Lio…
**************************************
Episode 5 – Home Slash
Scene: Underneath Skull Rock
Music: Dream – “He Loves U Not” (Insturmental)
At this moment Cortex was helping Teejay in getting his sword out of the stiff ooze and Crash was heading towards Lio in anger…
Crash: You don’t understand what we want to do with you…
Lio: Of course you do – drain my energy, pull a submission, be sent flyin’ through a wall, get fruit chucked atcha, get a slash from a Samaurai sword…
Cortex: That’s what I would do to you in a minute if you don’t shut up!
Crash: You tell ‘im! (turns to Lio) And we have something else in mind for you…
Lio: What for?
Crash: This is for letting Tiko get away with the Powers…
(Music changes – Hi-Gate – “Gotta Work It Out”)
He got out his bazooka and started firing missiles at Lio, who started running away from the shots. 30 missiles fired and he was still intact. Meanwhile, back with the others, we have a slight problem…
Cortex: (trying to pull the sword out) Almost… there…
Teejay was still stood there in suspense, until the sword was finally pulled out but…
Teejay: Thanks for pulling it out but…
Cortex: But what?
Teejay: Why did the sword snap in half?
Cortex: That I can’t help, but we’re sure to fix it back at camp.
Teejay: Sure!
(Music stops)
Suddenly, there was a bright spark from behind them.
Teejay: (turns around) What the… (gasps)
In front of him he saw Crash trapped in the pink ooze, unconscious.
Lio: (laughs vilely) Your little marsupial friend can’t help you now!
Teejay: This just leaves us, and you’ll never underestimate us…
Lio: Prove it!
Teejay: Um… (turns to Cortex) Uncle Neo, I need a strategy here!
Cortex: I think I have one in mind…
[Music restarts – Wheatus – “Teenage Dirtbag” (Middle 8 Instrumental)]
Both of them huddled.
Teejay: Do you know his weakness?
Cortex: He doesn’t really have one, but remember – his ooze can wipe out anything.
Teejay: Hey… yeah!
Cortex: And you already know its toughness, so this strategy should work!
Teejay: I’m goin’ in! (draws out his snapped sword)
[Music restarts – Anjelic – “Can’t Keep Me Silent” (Club Version Intro)]
Lio: (laughs out madly) THAT SWORD!!!!!!! You expect ME to lose against that?
Teejay: Show me what you’ve got!
Lio: OK, here goes!
He gets out another blob of ooze and throws it at Teejay, but he swung his sword like a baseball bat and hit it right back at him, sending him down to the floor.
(Music stops)
Teejay: What do you have to say about that?
Lio: You won that battle… but you haven’t… won… the… war… (passes out)
Teejay smirked and then used psychic power – you read that right – to send him over the horizon.
Cortex: (stunned) How… how did you do that?
Teejay: My mum taught me how to do that. It’s a hard process – you don’t want a headache!
Cortex: I know I don’t but other attacks do…
[Music changes – Shaggy – “It Wasn’t Me” (Finish)]
Then from under the meteorite rolled what looked like a key made from moon rock.
Teejay: Ah… (picks up the relic) If this is how Tiko got here… but it seems so familiar…
Cortex: If that’s the case then we need to take this for an examination.
Teejay: OK! (gives the relic to Cortex) You just go. I’ll catch up.
As Cortex started heading back towards civilization Teejay started struggling to use psychic power to lift the rest of the Crash Team from off the ground…
*********************************************
Episode 6 – Rock Like A Virgin
Scene: Snappy’s cabin
Music: Delirium feat. Sarah McLachlan – “Silence” (Original version, instrumental)
Four of our heroes were seen around Snappy, who was using a magnifying glass to try and identity the relic.
Snappy: Hmmm… this thing seems familiar…
Crash: Well? What is it?
Snappy: If I’m not mistaken the moon rock tells me that this is the long lost Key of Virgo, the most powerful relic in the Realm of the Stars.
Monnika: Realm of the Stars?
Ryane: Even I haven’t heard of it.
Crash: Stupid question time – why would Tiko want something like that?
Monnika: What do you mean?
Crash: I mean that Teejay showed it to me shortly after reviving us and told me where it came from.
Ryane: Ah, I see! But hang on…
Crash: What?
Ryane: You know I said earlier that the Powers of the Four Seasons can now only work with a powerful relic?
Crash: Right.
Ryane: This could be it!
Boron howled madly.
Ryane: Like, we need to guard this somewhere! (turns to Snappy) Are you up for the challenge?
Snappy: But I don’t think I’m fully trained for it – not even potty trained.
Ryane: (sighs) Come on Snappy – you’re our only hope!
Snappy: But…
Ryane: You managed to save the lives of both Cortex and Boron when they were younger and kept them at bay. That’s why you have the right experience for this job too! If you don’t guard it, then Tiko may find it and sooner enough will take over the world!!
Snappy: Er… good point. I’ll keep guard of it!
Ryane: Now we need a strategy to take down his crew…
Crash: Have you tried contact with Coco?
Monnika: Sorry – the phone lines have been cut.
Crash: O… K… maybe we should make it to my home on foot. It’s not that far – it’s just across the island!
Boron started barking at Crash.
Crash: What’s he saying?
Ryane: Let me see… “What about the bomb that blew it up a couple of months ago?”
Crash: We managed to repair it when we had time.
Boron: Ah… (slaps himself on the forehead)
Monnika: One final thing – has Teejay’s sword been fixed yet?
Cortex came into the room in wielding equipment, with Teejay following him, his sword good as new.
Teejay: Thanks Uncle! I wonder what life would be like if you weren’t here…
A big teardrop comes down the side of everyone else’s faces.
Crash: Er… like uncle like nephew I guess.
Snappy: Looks like you guys are ready for your next job!
Crash: Thanks! Come on guys!
Our heroes leave the home for their next destination while Snappy gets out a thermometer and a hot water bottle and heads upstairs.
*********************************************
Episode 7 – Wither Away
Scene: Deep in Turtle Woods
Music: Alice Deejay – “The Lonely One” (Intro)
Our heroes were seen sprinting towards the other side of the island, where Crash’s home was in wait…
(Music turns instrumental)
Teejay: How far is your home?
Crash: It’s just another 200 yards from here so it would be easy to get there…
(Music fades away)
Voice: STOP!
Monnika: Huh?
[Music restarts – Gorrilaz – “Clint Eastwood” (Instrumental)]
They stop running and drew out their weapons. Then the person with the voice came out from the bushes, revealing himself as Rilla Roo.
Crash: Double R? What are you doin’?
Rilla: Guys… where are you going?
Ryane: Tiko may cause a second strike here so we need to develop a strategy over at Crash’s place.
Rilla: I wouldn’t do that if I were you…
Crash: Why not?
Rilla: Because the road ahead has been blocked by series of dead trees. We have a set of analysers trying to look at the problem…
Voice: I FOUND IT! I FOUND IT!
Komodo Joe was seen heading towards the others with a pile of soil in his hands.
Rilla: What have you found?
Joe: Jusssssssst look… (shows the soil to everyone)
Teejay: I don’t see any differences.
Cortex: Teejay, it’s obvious… (gives him a magnifying glass)
Teejay: I’m still not sure… (uses the magnifying glass to see closely to the soil) No wonder…
Crash: What’s the matter?
Teejay: The soil… there’s no water in it!
Joe: Jusssssssst as I thought!
Rilla: If lack of water is causing this… then maybe we should need to figure out this loss…
Voice: I’VE FOUND SOMETHING ELSE!!!!!!
Pinstripe then came rushing towards them.
Monnika: What’s the problem?
Pinstripe: The river’s run dry!
Ryane: You’re joking – and I thought we have good weather here…
Cortex: We’ll try and travel upstream and find the problem. I have a good feeling it’s one of my siblings again.
Crash: A good feeling? I thought they were rock hard…
Cortex: Who else could it be?
Rilla: Team Rocket?
Pinstripe: I doubt it – they’re still busy trying to capture a Pikachu.
Rilla: Oh yeah…
Crash: Come on guys – we’ve got some work to do if we must beat the trees!
Our heroes then started running across the banks of the river to find the cause…
*********************************************
Episode 8 – Rock Hard
Scene: Further upstream the river, at the edge of Turtle Woods
Music: JJ72 – “October Swimmer” (Instrumental)
One minute our heroes were seen speeding upstream towards the problem, and the next minute they stopped.
Crash: Looks like this is the end of the trail…
A big boulder was seen blocking the river.
Monnika: OK, who put that there?
Cortex: I guess I was wrong – Komodo Moe may have put that there…
Ryane: Why? You could then again be wrong.
Cortex: Because Oxide and the others are a bit too weak to lift up a boulder.
Monnika: Don’t even think about underestimating them now, or else we could be in hot water.
Teejay: Oh well… best get back to business. We need to remove that boulder…
Ryane: Let me try!
She tried to push the boulder out from the banks but she failed.
Monnika: OK, where’s Tiny when you need him?
[Music changes – Anjelic – “Can’t Keep Me Silent” (Judge Jules mix, instrumental)]
Voice: You won’t need him – I’ll be through with you guysssssss soon!
Crash: Oh no…
Cortex: Not him again!
Teejay: Save your prêt guys – this guy seems like a hard nut!
The bully jumped out from behind the trees revealing himself as Komodo Moe.
Teejay: Ah, so that’s the big teaser this time…
Crash: What’s with the boulder?
Moe: You’ll never know, sssssssuckerssssssss!
Ryane: Talk to the hand, or walk with the blades!
Both Cortex and Teejay drew out their swords.
Moe: NEVER! And besssssidessssss, I sssssstill need that sssssssword back, doc!
Cortex: Serves you right for doing the wrong attack in the battle at Japan!
Teejay: Well said!!!
Moe: OK, I admit – it’s just a case of weakening down your forces!
Crash: You can’t weaken US down – like you never did! Face the blades!
Moe: Do I have a chhhhhoiccccce?
Crash: Yeah – this or the river!
Moe: Neither! You facccccccce MY bladessssss!!!!!
Immediately he tried to tackle Cortex and Teejay, but they both blocked the shots.
Ryane: Keep on going!
They ended up in a two-on-one battle blocking shots from their enemy and attacking when they had the chance, but their opposition also took guard.
Crash: I don’t have an idea about who might survive this one – they’re equally as good as each other.
Ryane: How can you tell?
Crash: Experience. You should have it.
(Music stops)
Then there was a squeal from both sword fighters as they were struck by Moe’s blade and sent unconscious. Then he picked up his stolen blade and laughed vilely.
[Music restarts – Apollo 440 – “Charlie’s Angels 2000” (Intro)]
Monnika: That’s just not right… lemme at ‘im!
Ryane: Careful, Monique – remember what happened last time?
Monnika: Yeah, I know.
Crash: We are counting on you… but don’t worry if you get struck – we’re here for backup.
Monnika: Watch out – the ice princess is about! (puts her fists together)
Then she started walking towards Moe with a wicked look on her face. What tricks will she have up her sleeve if she has any?
*********************************
Episode 9 – Duck Fight
Scene: Further upstream the river, at the edge of Turtle Woods
Music: Limp Biskit – “Rollin’” (Instrumental)
Monnika was seen in guard heading towards a dogfight she may never forget…
Monnika: I hate to remember this… but I want you to move that boulder out from the river right now!
Moe: Ssssssssshaddup!
Monnika: Grrr….
Ryane: Remember – a peaceful protest isn’t gonna work, so do it the hard way!
Crash: No, wait – we don’t want you to use all your strength too early! What if he comes back with reinforcements?
Monnika: Don’t worry – you said that you guys would be in backup, right?
Crash and Ryane: (faintly) Right…
Monnika: So I’ll be all right! There you go!
Crash: Be careful – we don’t want to take you into hospital!
Monnika: I’ll tr…
(Music changes – Voodoo and Serano – “Blood Is Pumpin’”)
Before she can say anything else Moe struck her sword towards Monnika, who only just dodged it in the nick of time.
Monnika: Close…
After several sword slashes, she then jumped into the air and fired an ice beam from her palms…
Crash: She’s got it for sure! Another win in the bag!
But then Moe blocked it and then the beam reflected back to her…
Ryane: LOOK OUT! IT’S GONNA STRIKE!!!!!!
But it was too late. Monnika was taken down by the reflection and was changed into an ice sculpture hurling towards the ground and luckily didn’t break.
Crash: Ah… (dashes towards Monnika) This doesn’t look good – it’s just the three of us left!
Ryane: Calm down Crash – it’s quality, not quantity! And we have plenty of that!
Crash: Yeah, but remember what happened last time?
Ryane: Oh yeah… he struck me down on the first attack… but I’m not letting that happen again!
Boron started growling at Moe.
Ryane: Stand back – we’ve got a war to get through.
Crash: GO FOR IT!
Ryane then started speeding around Moe in circles while at the same time Crash and Boron dragged the others to one side.
Moe: I feel… I feel… (starts looking dizzy)
Then Crash got out 2 revival potions from his backpack and gave them to Cortex and Teejay, while Boron tried to blow onto Monnika…
Crash: Why are you doing that?
Boron takes off a chunk of excess ice and scrunches it tightly in his hands, causing it to melt.
Crash: You don’t do it like that, you daft thing!
(Music fades)
Voice: Don’t call him daft!
Crash: (turns around) Why not, eh Mr… whoa… I did it!
[Music restarts – Mis-Teeq – “Why” (Instrumental)]
Cortex and Teejay were seen alive and well, but they were also breathing fast…
Crash: Why are you breathing so hard?
Teejay: Maybe it’s the fight… but we’ll be all right.
Cortex: Teejay’s a poet and I didn’t know it. Oh well… (gets out a flare) We’ll try and help Monnika out… speaking of which… what’s happened to her?
Crash: It’s a long story. We’ll be back to…
(Music stops)
Then there was a squeal and a thud from the battle site.
Crash: (turns to Ryane) Ryane, are you… YEEEEEAAAAAAH!!!!! You did it! You did it!
[Music restarts – Yazz – “The Only Way Is Up” (Instrumental)]
Moe was seen on the floor unconscious and Ryane was gasping for air.
Crash: Hey – great job!
Cortex: (gets his sword back from Moe) But how are we going to remove the boulder?
Ryane: I don’t know…
[Music changes – Alice Deejay – “The Lonely One” (Instrumental)]
Just then she started to glow pink.
Teejay: Hey – what are you doin’?
She stopped glowing a few seconds later.
Ryane: I don’t know what was that about, but it’s usually either a new ability or an increase in strength…
Crash: We’ll find out soon.
Ryane: (leans against the boulder) I guess so…
Then her leaning caused a crack in the stone.
Ryane: Crikey… no wonder what it was!
Everyone started cheering on for her, causing her to try moving the boulder again and this time around she pushed it out of the banks with ease, letting the water flow again.
Crash: Good stuff! Now we can be able to head back towards my house!
Ryane: I hope so… as long as them “wardens” don’t block the route this time…
Crash: Well what are you waiting for? Come on, let’s go…
Cortex: Wait!
Crash: Why?
Cortex: Because Monnika’s nearly defrosted. She’ll be out soon…
Then she started to revive pretty quickly.
Monnika: (faintly) What… happened…
Crash: It’s a long story. We’ll explain it to you on the way!
Then our heroes started their route downstream back to the chaos site…
TO BE CONTINUED
***********************
OUT-TAKES OF THE SUBDIVISION
Tiko: I bet you don’t understand my next plan…
Cortex: (faintly) Here we go again…
Suddenly lightning struck at the rock, causing the part of the rock with the Powers in to break off and roll across the floor…
Tiko: … (sings) Keep rollin’ rollin’ rollin’ rollin’… *
Cortex started laughing as he walked off stage.
*********************************************
Teejay: You knew him?
Cortex: Of course I do – he’s my evil brother!
Teejay: Are you sure? Well to make sure if you’re right…
Boron started snoring loudly.
Teejay: Er… was that on the script?
The cast and crew started laughing.
***********************************
Cortex: I’ll see if I can spy on them…
Teejay: Be careful! Remember what happened in your dream…
Cortex: I know… (in a high-pitched and squeaky voice) I don’t want to get cut in half!
Director: CUT!
Cortex: Sorry – I know that because I’m male I’m nearly pathetic at speaking in a high voice…
Crash: Ahem… what about the Survival of the Fastest thing?
Director: Let me sort it out myself, thank you very much...
*********************************************
Ryane: That’s it! (fires a fireball on Lio’s shirt)
Lio: (screams) MY SHIRT!!!!!!
At this moment his shirt was on fire, causing him to roll around onto the floor…
2 HOURS LATER
The fire still wasn’t out.
Teejay: I’ll call for a fireman… (goes offstage)
**********************************
Teejay: Show me what you’ve got!
Lio: OK, here goes!
He gets out another blob of ooze and throws it at Teejay, but he swung his sword like a baseball bat and accidentally stuck the blob on the end of it, causing him to spin around several times and eventually fell down to the ground on his back.
Cortex: Should I find you a stunt-double?
Teejay: (dizzily) No thanks – I’ll eventually do it myself…
*********************************
Ryane: Like, we need to guard this somewhere! (turns to Snappy) Are you up for the challenge?
Snappy: But I don’t think I’m fully trained for it – not even potty trained.
Ryane: (sighs) Come… Oh man… (dashes offstage) Sorry - I need the bog...
Crash: Shall we scrap the “potty trained” line?
****************************
Cortex: Who else could it be?
Rilla: Team Rocket?
Pinstripe: I doubt it – they’re still busy trying to capture a Pikachu.
Sooner enough, Team Rocket was seen chasing Pikachu across the stage.
Jesse: You’re supposed to get into the glass cage for this scene, squeaky!
Pikachu: (shaking its head) Pika pika!
James: You have no other choice…
Crash: (sighs) I hate filming next to the Pokémon set.
**********************************
Teejay: We need to remove that boulder…
Ryane: Let me try!
She tried to push the boulder out from the banks but she accidentally breaks it into rubble and falls into it.
Director: CUT! Ryane, are you all right?
Ryane: (muffling) I’m OK!
************************
After several sword slashes, Monnika then jumped into the air and fired an ice beam from her palms…
Crash: She’s got it for sure! Another win in the bag!
But then Moe blocked it and broke both swords in the process.
Moe: MY SSSSSSWORDSSSSSSSS!!!!!
Ryane: They’re not YOUR swords – they’re just props!
Moe: I know… but I don’t know if they have any more…
******************************************
* That's one of the lyrics for “Rollin’” by Limp Biskit. Although it only reached #65 in America you can still catch it on WWF as the new theme tune for The Undertaker.
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