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Do you ever think about being normal?
I guess I've got a normal life.
Good job, food to eat, good husband
the perfect marriage then why do I feel this way
There is no explanation for these feelings
Nothings missing yet everything's missing
one set of voice tell me I have a good life
The other tells me to run
Running has always been the problem
I always want to run
Yet not getting anywhere
The years fly by
Yet I sit locked into the past only wanting the future
Never the present
I guess I'm crazy yet there is no sanity
The mind wanders constantly
Never happy with what I have
There is no one to talk to,
to explain
No one would understand
the stories in my mind
They have always been there
forever
I thought they would go away
yet they linger
Like late night guests
never wanting to leave
Does everyone have them
Does everyone experience the pain, the guilt, the fear
of spending another day in this existance
This prison I have made.
Yet the keys remain ellusive
Who would understand
Maybe I should tell all
Let someone into this world of mine
Yet I would be trading one prison for another
No one would understand
I'm not sure what I want anymore
except just to leave this place
Maybe to live with the mountains for they might understand.
© written in 1986
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