“Chris...I can’t leave without Brynn and Javan...they’d have my head, and you know that.” I ran my fingers through his hair gently, noticing the soft texture of each strand.
“You aren’t going to be leaving them...see Justin is making sure that they both go...along with Ashli..and well Joey is bringing Faith, and JC isn’t gonna forget about Lizzy. You’ll all be there...we won’t have to leave anything behind this time...no more late night phone calls..no more tears...just you in my arms...every night.” His big brown eyes gazed into mine, and I knew he had me without saying another word.
“How could I ever say no to being in your arms every night....I’ll come..I’ll come.” I stooped down to softly place my lips against his....he stood, only deepening the pressure between us.
I didn’t take much to convince the others to go either...and before we knew what had hit us..we were packing for the four month trek across the United States and Canada. I was nervous to say the least..I had never lived on a tour bus...had never really traveled that far from home..and had not dealt with the fan frenzy that much. I was being thrown into the middle of all this, and I was a little scared that my relationship with Chris was gonna go public. I liked the quiet..no fans with camera’s in our faces type thing..and now...now I was taking all that I loved, and throwing it out for the world to snatch up. After Faith had gotten the news..she freaked....and pulled away from everyone. Now I knew that her nervousness about Joey leaving was valid..but why she was making herself distance now..was bewilderment. I tried taking her aside and talking to her, but she assured me that everything was fine, and not to worry about her. I wanted to go to Joey...to tell him, but I knew that he probably shouldn’t be bothered with this at the moment....he had a lot on his mind...besides that...they were back in Lakeland for the next couple of days. She worried me and the more I watched her, the more she sheltered herself away. I cornered Brynn in the hall...knowing full well that she had the same concerns.
“Any idea what is up with Faith?” I leaned against the wall, propping my foot up for more support.
“I haven’t got a clue, and I’m not even sure where to begin to help her out. We could call Joey, but what can he do over the phone...we could talk to Ashli..but she’s more worried about how to pack all of her designer clothes without getting them wrinkled..and she doesn’t quite know yet if there is enough room on the bus for all her shoes. Javan and Faith get along really well..so I thought...maybe she’ll talk to him.” Brynn’s confused expression met mine..and I just nodded my head slowly.
“It’s worth a shot....” I pushed against the wall...scouring the house for the spiked blond one. I finally found him out back by the pool...looking as relaxed as ever. “Javan..can I talk to you?” I sat next to him...and he looked over at me..the ever present smile on his face.
“Girl..you never need to ask if you can talk to me..cuz you know I’m always here to listen....what’s on your mind?” He slipped his sunglasses from his face, his bight eyes tore into mine.
“I’m a little worried about Faith...she’s freaking out over the fact that we’re going on tour with the guys.....and she won’t tell me why.” I fiddled with the towel that lay next to me...not quite sure of how Javan would respond.
“I’m assuming that you want me to talk to her....or am I totally misreading that look of pleading on your face.” My gaze shot up to look at him again..and his smile warmed me inside.
I just nodded my head..for he knew what I was thinking..he always seemed to know what I was thinking. Javan rose to his feet...patting my shoulder as he walked by me...I breathed a sigh of relief...because for some reason..I knew he’d fix everything.
Faith called me later that night...and explained why she had freaked out....all I did was listen to her fears and worries..as she rambled on and on. She had been scared of Joey cheating on her while he was away...she wanted to be believe that he wouldn’t...now however she was gonna be there..she would see first hand how he acted. Her fears ran deep..and from what she was discussing with me..I assumed that Joey hadn’t talked to her yet. I tried to tell her that Joey knew of her fears..and that he was gonna take her heart and hold it with gentle hands. I know Faith wanted to believe me...but she pointed out the fact that Joey had cheated on Ashli with her...so what would stop him from doing it again. Goodness..her faith in Joey didn’t run to deep..but I understood her fears to a certain point...it was hard to date someone that was loved by so many..but sometimes you just had to trust them...give up those insecurities. We talked for hours...the minutes ticking by quickly..and the sleep invading my eyes. I couldn’t let her down though..so I continued to listen to her...until she herself could not stay awake. I hung up the phone...thinking about our conversation and all her fears...I wondered about the others...if Lizzy had any fears...if Ashli...if I did. Chris was everything to me...he was the boyfriend that I had always wanted..the one that would make all my dreams come true..the one that made me feel like a queen. He had never hurt me..and never would..but the pressures of fame can get to anyone...could they get to him too? I shook the thoughts from my head..I was not about to doubt Chris..for he had gained my trust many times over, and I was not about to let him down now..not when he needed me. I pulled the covers up around my chin...sighing softly as I let his face fill my dreams.
My of Departure*
“Look I cannot honestly be expected to drag my bags all the way to the bus...someone should come and help me....” Ashli’s insistence upon help was dragging my patience thin. I tried to just smile and walk by her without commenting..but her annoying little whine brought me back into her world. “Sara..maybe you could go over there and get one of those black guys to help. These bags are too heavy for me.”
I groaned under my breath, dropping my bags to the pavement. “Here Ashli..let me help you..since I’m not busy.” I grabbed the bag out of her hand, and dragged it towards the bus.
“Be careful with that now..its contents are worth more then you’re whole life.” I stopped in my tracks..letting go of her bag to turn around and face her.
“What did you just say?” She had been walking on thin ice for quite some time now..but with no one around to stop me..I was ready to break that layer and let her drown.
“I said to be careful with my bag. See all of my precious things are in there..and I wouldn’t want to get angry with you for destroying them.” She stepped up next to me...placing her small hand on my arm.
“If these mean so much to you...you carry them yourself.” I shrugged her hand off my arm, storming past her to retrieve my own belongings. I was in such a huff that I didn’t see Chris making his way towards me....that is until I slammed into his chest.
“Whoa there sweet thing....where you off to in such a hurry.” His arms went around me, bringing my anger back into control.
“As far away from HER as I can.” I pointed towards Ashli who was standing over her luggage fixing her makeup.
“Justin likes her..you know that..so staying upset or angry with her will not help.” He picked up one of my bags, walking with me towards the open compartment on the bus.
“I know that Chris..she’s over at our house every day...but liking her is hard. There is something about her that scares me..and makes me fear for Justin’s well being...she’s gonna crush him...I know it.” I wrapped my arms around Chris’ trim waist...knowing that the simple gesture would bring me comfort.
“Baby...just let Justin do what he feels is right..you know from the past if you get in his way..or try to tell him what to do..he’ll just end up getting mad at you..and that’s not what we need on this tour.....you were invited to come along because we miss you too much when we leave you here.” Chris leaned his body into mine...pressing me up against the bus. “Besides that...I want you to think about me this trip..and not Justin’s love life.”
I giggled as he kissed my eye lids..working his way down to touch my lips with his. “You have my undivided attention.”
We finished putting my things away, and I climbed up onto the bus..only to find Brynn and Lance engrossed in conversation. I had no desire to disturb them..so I carefully walked back down the stairs..bumping into Justin at the bottom. His angry eyes met mine..and I knew for a fact that I was in trouble. He grabbed my arm, and pulled me out of hearing range of others.
“What is this I hear of you not helping Ashli when she so kindly asked you?” Justin’s grip on my arm begin to hurt..so I roughly shook it off.
“She did NOT kindly ask me..she basically whined until I took her bag from her. Justin she told me that her luggage was worth more than my whole life....HOW was I supposed to respond to that?” I pushed into his firm chest...making sure he knew just how upset I was.
“She’s not used to doing things on her own..she comes from a......” I interrupted him before he could finish.
“I know I know..she comes from a well off family...where she never had to do a damn thing her entire life.....Why in God’s name do you feel the need to go out with her?” I met his angry glare with one of my own.....only to find that his eyes had softened.
“Sar..she doesn’t mean more to me then you do....so please don’t think she does. She’s someone who brings back a part of me that I thought was dead...and I missed that part. I will NOT give you up..you’re my Sar..and I love you too much for that. Just please...trust me.” He gently grabbed my hand..holding it close to his heart. “I do know what I’m doing.”
I sighed...placing my hand on his cheek. “I know Justin....she just makes me so mad.”
“Try to get along with her..for me...that’s all I ask.” His eyes pleaded with mine for approval.
“Fine....fine.” His soft lips grazed my cheek as he ran out of sight to go find Ashli. “Just because I agree doesn’t mean I approve.”
