“Hi- my name is Clara and I’m 7 years old and I want to thank *NSYNC so much for making my dream come true and I wanna……and I wanna…….” Clara stuttered as she felt JC’s hand on her back and he smiled down at her before the rest of the guys joined him up at the front of the stage. Lance reached down to pick her up, Joey catching the microphone as it slipped from her stunned hand and the audience chuckled lightly.
Joey kissed her cheek lightly as Chris took the microphone from him. “Clara did you have song you wanted us to sing for you sweetie??” He asked playfully as Clara giggled in Lance’s arms and spoke into the microphone.
“I wanted you to sing ‘Everything I Own’ cuz when I met Justin he was looking for his friend and he couldn’t find her so I thought the song might make him remember where she was.” Clara smiled as a smile draped across Justin’s lips and he leaned in to kiss her cheek.
“Well I believe the lady asked us to sing ‘Everything I Own’. Can we do that guys??” Chris asked into the microphone as the crowd went while and the guys all jumped around to pretend like they were gearing up for a big basketball game or something.
A sly smile spread across Chris’ lips as he took Clara’s little hand and sat her on a stool mid-stage. “Your wish is our command princess.” Chris said as the music started and I sat back, smiling at what was happening in front of me, watching Clara, knowing she was more sick than I’d ever been, but what a huge smile these 5 guys could bring to her face.
“You shelter me from harm, you kept me warm…….you kept me warrrrrrrm. And you gave my life to me, you set me free, you set me freeeeeeeeee…….” JC’s voice began as I looked over at Sara, watching Chris admiringly.
Justin’s voice broke me from my thoughts as I listened to the words. Though I’d listened to the guys’ CD millions of times, I hadn’t ever really taken these words to heart. That is, until I felt Justin’s burning eyes gazing in our direction.
“And nobody else could ever know, the part of that can’t let gooooooooooo……. I’d give up my life, my heart ya, my home, I would give everything I own, just to have you, back again.” He sang slowly as he closed his eyes and seemed to take the words to heart himself. I felt Kylie’s arm graze my own as I looked over and saw tears in her eyes.
“Is there someone you know, loving them soooo, taking them all for granteeeeeeeed…….” Chris and Justin’s voices combined before Joey and JC picked up with them. “You may lose them one day, someone takes them away……and they don’t hear the words you long to say…….long to SAYYYYYY…….”
I don’t remember the rest of the song, the guys escorting Clara off the stage, or the rest of the concert even. I was so stuck on what they had sung in that song so emotionally. They all knew it applied. How had Clara? Perhaps she was our little angel in disguise.
I had so much on my mind, too much to contemplate at once. I was ready to talk to my friends- or what I used to be able to call friends, but I hadn’t been much of a friend to any of them lately. But I couldn’t bring myself too. I don’’t know what was holding me back. But I couldn’t.
I could feel Justin’s eyes on me as he stood in the doorway watching me dance again, trying to get my mind off of life. I turned to volume up in my earphones as I slowly moved to the lyrical music. Even though Justin was one of the first I needed to talk too- probably the very first- I knew he was causing as many problems as I was, and we needed to work through this together.
He was standing in the doorway, taking deep breaths as if he had something to run up to me to tell me like he always did when we were little…………..
“Uh oh…….Justin looks like he just beat Magic Johnson in basketball.” Sara said as I giggled, watching a 12 year old Justin Timberlake come strutting up, trying to look cool before he burst out in a run, an evident cocky smile born on his face.
“Dude I got some PLAY YO!!” Justin attempted to bring out his ‘Tennessee ghettoness’, but it appeared to not be working. I rolled my eyes as I looked at our curly-headed friend.
“Nut uh Justin. Who would kiss YOU??” I asked, grossed-out by the idea that some girl would kiss my best friend. He punched my arm as I licked my popsicle Sara and I had just bought from the ice cream truck.
“I happen to be a real lady’s man. At least that’s what my grandpa says……..” Justin said, contemplating the validity of his statement as Sara choked on her ice cream before laughing out loud.
“JUJU that’s the funniest thing y’all have ever said!!” Sara laughed as I started giggling.
“Don’t tell me it was that Britney girl.” I said, looking him deep in the eye, knowing he couldn’t lie to me. I hated that girl, she was always rude to me ever since the first time I’d met her, which was only about a week ago, but in my twelve years, a week was an eternity. Justin was packing up to move this week to go be on ‘The Mickey Mouse Club’ in Florida, and even my 12 year old mind knew she was bad news.
“So??” He asked as I shook my head.
“EWWWWW Gross Justin!! She doesn’t count!!” I squealed as Justin looked at me accusingly.
“YOU KISSED Ryan Gosling at that party last weekend!” He accused back as I looked at him and stuck out my tongue.
“SO that’’s cuz he was cute. And HE kissed ME.” I said, the typical little girl response, trying to be older than I was, trying to grow up as fast as I could..
“I’m gonna go find Javan. He’ll appreciate my manliness.” Justin pouted as I giggled.
“Javan’s momma made him come inside to feed the dog.” Sara stated matter-of-factly as I looked at Justin and then back at her.
“Y’all don’’t actually LIKE each other do you??” I asked, a bit worried for my friend.
Sara watched him, hoping for the same answer as I did. “No she’s snobby, but I’m a playa and now she thinks I’m her…………boyfriend.” He spat out as I relaxed and laughed at Justin’s newly-found lingo.
“Keep us posted Curly.” Sara said as he laughed and the three of us turned to see if Javan could come out to play.
Ever since that day , there wasn’t a time that Justin didn’t run to Sara or I for advice, or to tell us something, or just to talk. He and Javan always talked about their ‘manliness’ while Sara and I gabbed on and on about our cute date last night or about how boring the guy turned out to be.
I hadn’t been friends to any of them lately. Lizzy, Faith, Kylie, everyone had tried to be my friend and I was pushing them all away. As I turned back to the door I saw Kylie watching Justin as he sighed and turned away from the door to walk away. He didn’’t talk to me, and whatever he had wanted to talk to me about, obviously wasn’t that important to him. Either that, or he was scared.
I pulled off my head phones and sighed as I walked down the hall to my room. I heard Kylie talking with Sara, and what sounded like Lizzy and Faith talking with them. I wondered what they were talking about, but actually seemed to ache to be a part of it. That little Clara had touched part of me that hadn’t been touched for the last few weeks, and I realized it was what I missed.
I let myself into my room, too lazy to shut the door as I set my stuff down on the table and looked at the clock. The digital glow read 12:52. I really needed to get some sleep but I had so much on my mind, I couldn’t lay down and just sit there.
I heard Lizzy and Faith walk by as I stood up to open the bathroom door to jump in the shower. “Hey Liz?” I asked softly as she looked into the room and took a deep breath. “Can’t talk.” Was her only response. I shook my head lightly as I stepped into the shower. What was going on?
