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November 2, 2000 I don't know why, but lately I have been really caught up in online auctions. It started with that whole MTV auction. They are letting people bid on the items that were in the house. So, a friend of mine looked at some of the items. I was really getting hooked, and I started to bid on some of the items. I mean, I wasn't too off the hook because I didn't place any bids over 50 dollars. Granted, some of the items were stupid little books that I could have bought at some trashy bookstore. But the whole idea of owning something that was on tv…it's just cool. Well, some of the bids that I had placed got outbid, and I just couldn't have that. I am a really competitive person, and I can't stand to lose. So, when I was outbid…I couldn't help but bid again. I'll keep you updated on the auction, but I am currently the high bidder for a book owned by Julie, a book owned by Matt, and some really awesome lamp. To tell you the truth, I am really not happy with Dom right now. And, I don't want to say it, but I really think that she is a big reason for a lot of the discontentment in my life right now. For the last five years, we have been there for each other, and I know that she would give her life for me. However, she carries so many double standards, and I just can't stand it. Last year, I started to spend some time with other people, and I'm not talking about excessive time. Something like a couple nights a week. She seriously got mad at me. She said that I didn't spend enough time with her…I guess seeing her everyday wasn't enough. She told me that she didn't care that I was spending time with other people, but she just felt like I was going to forget about her and leave her for my other friends. I don't know how she could ever think that because I care so much about her, and we have gone through so much with each other. These other people are just friends, but they share the bond that her and I do. But, I still felt like I was being punished every time that I was with another person because she would get mad when I told her that I had spend the night at some other person's place. Well, for a little while, she has been spending time with this guy Jason, and I know that they are going to hook up. Well, she hasn't told me anything about him. I mean, I know him, and I knew him before she ever met him. But the deal is that when I don't tell her where I am going or if I had hung out with someone, she gets mad when she finds out. This doesn't really bother me one bit, but it I really see her dropping everything that she is doing for other people. But, when it comes to me…it's, "Oh, I'm busy," or I really have to go to bed," or even, "I promise so and so that I would go to their place." What a total and utter crock of shit. I'm not going to make a big deal about this right now because I know that I am irritated really easily right now. So, I am just going to wait and see if anything develops out of this. 
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