 |
|
|
June 27, 2001 What a day…what a day… The whole morning, I just spent loafing around my house…watching tv…eating…smoking…the norm. I called Tony last night, and we planned to get together after he got off of work today. So, I was pretty much just waiting for him to call me. So around 3:15pm, he gave me a call. I asked if he still wanted to get together…and he did. I got directions to his house, and I was on my way. About forty minutes into my drive…I was lost… I knew that I didn't know where I was going the whole time..but I needed to find my way fast. So, I gave Tony a call, and he lead me in the right direction. So, after a hours worth of driving, I finally got to his house. We talked a little, and I looked through some of his stuff. It was fun. Nothing really awkward. His friend gave him a call, and asked if he wanted to go bowling. He asked me, and I said that was fine. So, we headed out for some cigarettes, and then to the bowling alley. We waited a little for his friends to show, and when they did…I was introduced, and then we started to bowl. It was actually weird…every time I was introduced, it seemed like everyone already knew who I was…if not by name, then as Gapboy… This in my mind is a good thing because this means that Tony has been talking about me to his friends. So, we bowled two games… It was fun. I was really surprised that although I was amongst 16 year olds…things were too weird. Although I felt old a few times through out the night…it wasn't that bad. I might add that for not bowling in a really long time…I did pretty damn good. In our second game…I beat everyone's' ass with my score of 122…hehe… After bowling, we all decided to go out to eat. We went to this place called Sugar Bowl…little restaurant….semi-decent food. I was having a pretty good time, and it seemed like everyone else was as well. His friends were cool, and they seemed to enjoy my company. The group kind of dwindled after we ate…It was just Tony, his friends Amy and Beth, and I who went back to his place. We stayed there for a little…talked….sang along to Rent…and went through Tony's memory box. We were just waiting for Tony's friend Megan to get off of work so we could all head over to her place. We drove there, and then we just sat on her porch talking and smoking the whole night. It was just a bit odd because she was opening smoking in front of her parents. And all the others mentioned that their parents were cool with them smoking. I don't know if it's the times that are changing, or if it's just my parent who are a bit more strict about smoking. I don't know. Anywhoo…his friends really seemed to like me because they said that they approved of me. And although Tony and I haven't talked about starting a relationship…it seemed like his friend had already made that step for us…because they referred to me and his boyfriend. It was cool…if was really fine with me. Around 12:00pm, I dropped off some of Tony's friends, and he and I headed back to his place. We started talking about the situation between us, and what was going to happen. I told him that the age thing wasn't really a concern to me…and it really wasn't. I've been listening to what everyone else has had to say, and I started to believe that it was wrong for me to date Tony because he was only 16. I told myself that today was going to be my deciding factor of whether or not to date Tony. And after the night was done, I knew that I really liked Tony. I told Tony everything my friend have been telling me, and why it was kind of an issue for me.. He was really cute trying to be all wise and knowing as he gave me advice…but in the end he told me that everything was all up to me because the whole dating thing was more of an issue for me. I didn't really agree because if anything is going to happen between us..it's going to be both of our decisions. So…in the end, we decided that it was definitely a good decision for us to start dating. We kissed, and although it felt so good to be in his arms and to kiss him…I really just needed to think whether or not I made a good decision. Everything felt so right between us, and in my heart I knew I had made a good decision. That's all that really matters…and that's the story that I am sticking with. I told him to walk me to my car. He was leaning up against my car, and I was leaning against him as I faced him. We talked a little…and we kissed a little. It just felt so right. And as I'm typing this…it still feels right. With Todd…I knew things were wrong from the minute that kissed him… With Alan, I felt uncomfortable. Although I liked Alan…I just knew things weren't right… And even though I am leaving for school in two months and Tony only being 16…everything is as right as rain. I don't know what's going to happen between us…but I think that it's good. It's really quite exciting to me…this is the first boy that I've liked…pursued…and gotten. Needless to say, I'm quite happy. I won't say that I'm giddy like a school girl…but I feel my heart racing, and all my thoughts are with Tony. He is making me such a happy boy…and I am really glad about the decision that I made… 
|
| y e s t e r d a y |
|
|
