EPISODES
"You wouldn't strike a brain without a body, would you, Doctor?"
"Sprock's Body"
Alien women abduct Sprock's body but leave his brain behind; Kirkstone wants answers and telephone numbers.
"The Magnetize Incident"
Kirkstone is ordered to steal the mascot from a Rockulan ship.
"The Bypass Syndrome"
On a rather dull planet, Kirkstone loses his memory and marries an accountant; meanwhile, the Magnetize races to stop a hyperspace bypass construction crew from destroying the planet.
"Hungry Angel, come and see
All the food we got for thee
Hungry Angel, big and fat
Outer space food's where it's at!"
"And The Cavechildren Shall Feed"
Another alien creep lures children into buying him food from a new fast food station where a restraining order has been taken out against him.
"Is There No Booth In Trudy?"
Kirkstone is stranded on the planet Trudy and can't find a telephone to save his life.
"Spectre of the Slingshot"
Miserable aliens force the Magnetize crew to confront a gang of slingshotslingers from the past.
"Out... OUT... OUUUT!
And stay out!"
"Day of the Doveasaurus"
Klingasauruses take over the Magnetize with the help of another alien whatsit.
"But, Natirock, I can't stay. I'm a doctor, not a baker!"
"For My Stomach Is Empty And I Have Touched The Pie"
A hollow planet has one secret Kirkstone can't resist:
PIE.
"The Tholianite Web"
While the Magnetize tries to rescue another stoneship, Tholianites appear and offer free webspace on their servers.
"All My Plato's Stepchildren"
Slackers with mental powers force the Magnetize crew to act out scenes from soap operas.
"Yeah, I'm a fly! You were expectin' maybe a hyper-accelerated alien?"
"Blink of an Fly"
Hyper-decelerated aliens get in the way when Kirkstone goes out for a cup of espresso.
"The Pathetic"
Kirkstone tries to hit on some chick who won't talk about her two alien boyfriends.
"Elaan of Troyiustone"
Kirkstone falls maddeningly in love with the CEO of a corporation on her way to marry the son of their competitor.
"Whom Gods Annoy"
Kirkstone finds himself in another looney bin when the Magnetize stops to drop off shopping supplements.
"Let That Be Your Next-To-Last Battlefield"
Two alien clowns quibble about who's going to wear what makeup at a costume party.
"The Murk of Gideonrock"
Kirkstone catches a cold and a whole planet has to be immunized.
"Down in front!"
"That What Lives"
A beautiful-but-dangerous alien intruder forces Kirkstone to decide between dating her to death or just staying home and watching the fights.
"Hey! Prop that eardrum open, would ya?"
"The Lights of Zetarock"
Alien twinkling lights want to sign a long-term lease and move into the brain of Shoddy's new girlfriend.
"YEEEOWCH!! She bit me!"
"Requiem For Some Old Guy"
Some old guy on some planet has an androck daughter that Kirkstone just can't keeps his hands off of.
"The Never Minders"
Well, Kirkstone and Sprock try to make some people who live in some city in the clouds be nice to some miners down on the surface, and - oh, never mind...
"Well, wipe my feet and clear my nostrils... I got a clean bill of health from good ol' Fossils!"
"The Way to Woodrock"
Hippies hitch a ride on the Magnetize.
"Whaddaya think, Sprock? Hair or head?"
"The Savage Bedspread"
Kirkstone and Sprock must once again battle forgettable figures from history on an ice age planet.
"All Our Last Weeks"
On a doomed planet, Kirkstone, Sprock and Fossils go back in time to pick up some valuable memorabilia from the past.
"Turnaround Intruder"
Kirkstone finally becomes what he dates.
DON'T MISS THE OTHER PAGES!
STONE TREK ©2006 by BRIAN MATTHEWS
All concepts and media on this page © 2006 by Brian Matthews
STAR TREK © Paramount Pictures
THE FLINTSTONES © Hanna-Barbera
"KIRKSTONE TO MAGNETIZE..."
