Ptarmigan's Observations on The Laws of Cruising

The 1st Law of Cruising: The wind will be coming directly from where you are going. (As a consequence real cruisers seldom raise their sails.)

Second Law: If the wind is ever with you, the current will be strong and against you.

Third Law: The weatherman is always 180 degrees off in his forecasts.

Fourth Law: If there has been a prolonged dry spell, then it will surely rain when the cruise starts.

Fifth Law: It will always be rougher weather the farther you are from your destination.

Sixth Law: In rough weather DON'T EVER ask the captain a question when he is busy steering and navigating and using the urinal all at the same time.

Seventh Law: The fog will only set in when you've left the anchorage without a D.R. plot, and your Loran & GPS don't work.

Eighth Law: It is always a sunny clear day in the port you just left.

Ninth Law: Don't wait for the rising tide to ride the flood current up a river after heavy rains! There ain't no flood current; it is like trying to sail up Niagara Falls.

Tenth Law: The wave height will always be twice as high in the telling.

Eleventh Law: The engine will never fail when you are at the dock.

Twelfth Law: Any water in the bilge comes from somewhere!!

Last Law: It is okay to anchor in shallow water; as long as it is low tide.

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