Boston moving to Miami??

Hi Julio faithful, Joe here! While we should probably be focusing on Spring Training and the return of Julio, football just keeps grabbing the headlines! Right now I'm going to report to you a story that could rock the face of the continental United States!!!

Against the advice of the other Julio staff, I'm going ahead and report what everyone else is afraid to... the possible relocation of one of the larger American cities!

Boston is apparently sick of its shitty weather.

Rumors abound about the city of Boston moving to Florida to begin playing pro football for the Miami Dolphins! Other than the moral implications of letting an entire city play pro sports, I have to ask... Shouldn't they just play for the Patriots?

I looked into this conspiracy a bit. When questioned about the possible acquisition of the city, Dolphins coach Dave Wannstedt replied: "No! David, you idiot!" Realizing quickly that my name was not David, I figured out that the coach had gone completely insane. After all, he was probably planning to deal with a new player that was slightly larger than Orlando Brown and slightly smaller than Terrell Owens' ego! Quite a mental task indeed...

But then it hit me all at once... I was wrong! The city of Boston wasn't going to move to Miami... It must be the ROCK GROUP Boston, ready to relocate to Miami in the bitchin space ship from their album cover! With this theory in place, Jay Fiedler's recent difficulties with the team make all that much more sense... Can you imagine how loud a rock concert would be with those ears???

The Dolphins have More than a [good] feeling about the impending deal.

Following up on this new trend, there is word that New York is looking into acquiring Chicago, and Arizona is attempting to sign Kansas. Well, their playoff hopes are dust in the wind. Ha!

More on this story as it becomes available.

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