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	Barry's Eye On The News
	BRONX, NY - Lorena Bobbitt's sister was arrested last night for attempting to cause the same damage to her husband that Lorena had inflicted on her spouse. The sister didn't hit the mark and stabbed her husband in the leg by mistake. She has been charged with a missdeweiner. » BALTIMORE, MD - Johns Hopkins University recently announced the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science, tentitively named 'Administratum.' Administratum has 1 neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 111 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312. These 312 particles are held together by a force called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of peons.

 

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