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Stop telling GOD how big your storm is.
Instead tell your storm how big your
GOD is.


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GLOOM BUSTERS
# 17

~ THE SECRETS OF ~
JOY THAT MAKES
OUR LIVES HEALTHY  


Look what I found for y'all to browse through !


AND
LAUGHABLE
* * *   STORIES   * * *


DIAGNOSIS :
Stressed Out !
PRESCRIPTION :
One Belly Laugh Every Hour Until Cured !

SOUND STRANGE ? Not really, according to experts. As far back as biblical times, people have recognized the power of humor in overcoming everything from stress to major illness.
It has a positive impact on virtually every system in the body, plus provides a boost to the immune system and reduces pain. Even in the toughest of circumstances, a dose of appropriately used humor can make a enormous difference. It can serve as a way to overcome fear, anger and stress, plus boost creativity and well-being.
And of course, prayer is the key that brings about this condition that will enable man to enjoy any humor and laughter in his soul.

PSALMS 126:2 " Then was our mouth filled with laughter, and our tongue with singing: then said they among the heathen, The Lord hath done great things for them. " VERSE 3 " The Lord hath done great things for us; whereof we are glad. "


,- - - I SURE DID ~ PASTOR BILL ~ GOD BLESS Y'ALL


Music Now Playing :
" ONLY YOU "
     So Please Remember !    
If this isn't the day that makes y'all happy.....
Then tell me, what day are y'all looking for ?
ONLY YOU, Can make a difference in other folk's life !

             


  NOTE: EVEN AS YOU MOVE YOUR CURSOR YOU WILL
FIND THAT MOSES AND THE EAGLES IN FLIGHT ARE
FOLLOWING JESUS !


WHEN THE NAME HAS
A REAL MEANING  

   STOP !
IF YOU HEARD THIS ONE BEFORE

                 

The blonde showed up with two big dogs. When asked their names, she replied, " Rolex and Timex " Weird names for dogs she was told. She asked, " What else would you call watch dogs ? "

    

WELL, AT LEAST
THE BLOND LIKED IT,
AND SO DID THE DOGS  


**********************************************************

HEY YOU,
YES, YOU  

ONLY YOU  

Only you.....Can shake the mountains
Only you.....can calm the oceans
Only you.....hold the heavens in the palm of your hand

Tell me who.....can look inside me
Tell me who.....can purify me
Tell me who.....can love me deeply more than I understand

With just one hand you put the heavens into place
gave us life and gave the earth it's frame
who is man that you should touch him with your grace

And who am I that you should know my name
Only you.....can shake the mountains
Only you..... can calm the oceans
Only you.....can hold the heavens in the palm of your hand
Tell me who.....can look inside me
Tell me who.....can purify me
Tell me who.....can love me deeply more than I understand

~ ~ ~ ONLY YOU, SWEET JESUS ! ~ ~ ~

            
            
~ THANK YOU JESUS !!!! ~
~ KEEP SMILING ~

**********************************************************

   STOP !
IF YOU HEARD THIS ONE BEFORE

HOME DEPOT !
WHERE THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS RIGHT  

SAUSAGE, ANYONE ?

A guy goes into a store and tells the clerk, " I'd like some Polish sausage. "
The clerk looks at him and says, " Are you Polish ? "
The guy, clearly offended, says, " Well, yes I am.  But let me ask you something. "
If I had asked for Italian sausage would you ask me if I was Italian ? 
Or if I had asked for German bratwurst, would you ask me if I was German ? 
Or if I asked for a kosher hot dog would you ask me if I was Jewish ? 
Or if I had asked for a taco would you ask if I was Mexican ? 

Would ya, huh ?  Would ya ? "
The clerk says, " Well, no. "
With deep self-righteous indignation, the guy says,
" Well, all right then, why did you ask me if I'm Polish
just because I ask for Polish sausage ? "

The clerk replies, " Because this is HOME DEPOT ! "

**********************************************************

   STOP !
IF YOU HEARD THIS ONE BEFORE

~ A STRANGE ENCOUNTER ~
" STAMPS "
AT A U.S.
POST OFFICE WINDOW

A woman goes into the post office to buy stamps for her Christmas cards.

" What denomination ? " the clerk asks
" Oh, good heavens ! Have we come to this ? " The woman asks

"Well, give me 50 Catholic and 50 Baptist !

LIFE'S SWEET MUSIC OF " BROTHERLY LOVE. "

**********************************************************

   STOP !
IF YOU HEARD THIS ONE BEFORE

~ A TRAIN RIDE ~
" WATCH AND LEARN ! "

Three Southerners and three Yankees are traveling by train to the Super Bowl.
At the station, the three Northerners each buy a ticket and watch as the three Southerners buy just one ticket.
" How are the three of you going to travel on only one ticket ? " Asks one of
the Yankees. " Watch and learn, " answers one of the men from the South.
They all board the train. The three Yankee men take their respective seats
but all three Southerners cram into a toilet together and close the door.
Shortly after the train has departed, the conductor comes around
collecting tickets. He knocks on the toilet door and says, " Ticket please. "
The door opens just a crack and a single arm emerges with a ticket in hand.
The conductor takes it and moves on.

The Yankees see this happen and agree it was quite a clever idea,
so after the game, they decide to do the same thing on the return
trip and save some money.

When they get to the station, they buy a single ticket for the return trip,
but see, to their astonishment, that the three Southerners don't buy any
ticket at all. " How are you going to travel without a ticket ? " says one
perplexed Yankee. " Watch and learn, " answers the men from the South.

When they board the train the three Northerners cram themselves into a
toilet and the three Southerners cram into another toilet just down the way.

Shortly after the train is on its way, one of the Southerners leaves their toilet
and walks over to the toilet in which the Yankees are hiding.

The Southerner knocks on their door and says,

" Ticket Please. "

       ~ WAS THAT ONE TO FAST FOR Y'ALL ? ~
" CHECK OUT THE ONE BELOW "
~ A BIG COUNTRY SMILE ~
      

**********************************************************

   STOP !
IF YOU HEARD THIS ONE BEFORE

" GOD,
I'M GOING TO MAKE YOU A OFFER,
YOU CAN'T REFUSE ! "

Little Leroy came into the kitchen where his  mother was making dinner. His birthday was  coming up and he thought this was a
good time  to tell his mother what he wanted.

" Mom, I  want a bike for my birthday "

Little Leroy was a bit of a troublemaker. He had gotten  into
trouble at school and at home. Leroy's  mother asked him if he
thought he deserved to  get a bike for his birthday. Of
course, he thought he did.

Leroy's mother, being a Christian woman, wanted him to 
reflect on his behavior over the last year.

" Go to your  room and think about how you behaved this year,
then write a letter to God and tell him why you think you deserve
a bike for your birthday. "


Little Leroy stomped up the stairs to  his room and sat down
to write God a letter.


Letter #1

" Dear God,  I have been a very good boy this year and I would
like a bike for my birthday, a red one please.
Your friend, Leroy."

Leroy knew this wasn't true, he had not been a  very good boy.
So he tore up the letter and  started over.

Letter #2


" Dear God, this is your friend Leroy. I have been a pretty
good boy this year and I would like a red bike for my  birthday,
please.

Thank You, Your Friend, Leroy. "




Leroy knew this wasn't true either, so he tore  up that letter
and started yet again.

Letter #3


" Dear God,  I have been an " OK " boy this year. I still would
really really, really like a red bike for my birthday.

Thanks,

Leroy. "


Leroy knew  he could not send this letter to God either. So he
made one last try.


Letter #4

" Dear God, I know I haven't been a very good boy this year. I
am very sorry. I will be a good boy if you just  send me a red
bike for my birthday.  Pleeeeeeeeeaaassseee ! !

Thank You,
Leroy. "



He knew, even if it was true, this letter was not going to 
get him a bike. By now, Leroy was very upset.  He went downstairs and
told
his mom that he  wanted to go to church. " Just be home in time
for dinner", she told him. Leroy walked down the street to the
church
on the corner. He went into the church and  walked up to the
altar.
He looked around to  see if anyone was there-bent down, picked
up a
statue of the Virgin Mary, slipped it under his shirt and ran
out  of the church, down the street, into the house  and up to his
room. He shut the door to his  room and sat down with a piece of
paper
and a  pen. Leroy began to write.....


Letter #5


" Dear God,

I GOT YOUR MAMA. IF YOU WANT TO SEE HER AGAIN,
SEND THE BIKE !
YOU KNOW WHO ! ! ! "

~ SWEET LIL LEROY ~

**********************************************************

   STOP !
IF YOU HEARD THIS ONE BEFORE

" AWESOME GOD "
THIS IS WHY HE'S GOD  

This is almost overwhelming when you think about it.
                                       You MUST read to the end :
 
Moses and the people were in the desert, but what was he going to do with them?
 
They had to be fed, and feeding 2 or 3 million people requires a lot of food.
 
According to the Quartermaster General in the Army, it is reported that Moses would have to have had 1500 tons of food each day.  Do you know that to bring that much food each day, two freight trains, each at least a mile long, would be required !
 
Besides you must remember, they were out in the desert, so they would have to have firewood to use in cooking the food.  This would take 4000 tons of wood and a few more freight trains, each a mile long, just for one day.
 
And just think, they were forty years in transit.
 
And Oh yes!  They would have to have water.  If they only had enough to drink and wash a few dishes, it would take 11,000,000 gallons each day and a freight train with tank cars, 1800 miles long, just to bring water!
 
And then another thing !
 
They had to get across the Red Sea at night.  Now, if they went on a narrow path, double file, the line would be 800 miles long and would require 35 days and nights to get through.  So there had to be a space in the Red Sea, 3 miles wide so that they could walk 5000 abreast to get over in one night.
 
But then, there is another problem...............each time they camped at the end of the day, a campground two-thirds the size of the state of Rhode Island was required, or a total of 750 square miles long........
think of it !
 
This much space for camping.
 
Do you think Moses figured all this out before he left Egypt ?  I think not !
 
You see, Moses believed in God.  God took care of these things for him.
 
Now do you think God has any problem taking care of all your needs?
 
I asked the Lord to bless you As I prayed for you today.  To guide you and protect you as you go along your way..........  His love is always with you, His promises are true, And when we give Him all our cares, You know He will see us through.
 
Our God is an Awesome God !
 
So when the road you're traveling on seems difficult at best, just remember I'm praying and God will do the rest.
 

~ Y'ALL PONDER THIS FOR A WHILE ~

**********************************************************

   STOP !
IF YOU HEARD THIS ONE BEFORE

~ THE STORY ~
OF
" JUST A GLASS OF MILK ! "

One day, a poor boy who was selling goods from door to door to pay his way through school, found he had only one thin dime left, and he was hungry. He decided he would ask for a meal at the next house. However, he lost his nerve when a lovely young woman opened the door.
Instead of a meal he asked for a drink of water. She thought he looked hungry so brought him a large glass of milk. He drank it slowly, and then asked, " How much do I owe you ? "
" You don't owe me anything, " she replied. " Mother has taught us never to accept pay for a kindness. " He said, " Then I thank you from my heart. "
As Howard Kelly left that house, he not only felt stronger physically, but his faith in God and man was strong also. He had been ready to give up and quit.
Year's later that young woman became critically ill. The local doctors were baffled. They finally sent her to the big city, where they called in specialists to study her rare disease. Dr. Howard Kelly was called in for the consultation.
When he heard the name of the town she came from, a strange light filled his eyes. Immediately he rose and went down the hall of the hospital to her room. Dressed in his doctor's gown he went in to see her.
He recognized her at once. He went back to the consultation room determined to do his best to save her life. From that day on, he gave special attention to the case.
After a long struggle, the battle was won. Dr. Kelly requested the business office to pass the final bill to him for approval. He looked at it, then wrote something on the edge and the bill was sent to her room.
She feared to open it, for she was sure it would take the rest of her life to pay for it all. Finally she looked, and something caught her attention on the side of the bill. She read these words :
" PAID IN FULL WITH JUST ONE GLASS OF MILK. "

( Signed )
Dr. Howard Kelly.

Tears of joy flooded her eyes as her happy heart prayed: " Thank You, God, that Your love is shed abroad through human hearts and hands. "

**********************************************************

   STOP !
IF YOU HEARD THIS ONE BEFORE

~ THE HITCH HIKER ~
" A RIDE HE WILL NEVER FORGET ! "

This story happened about a month ago in a little town in Mexico, and even when it sounds like a spooky Alfred Hitchcock tale.
This guy was on the side of the road hitch hiking on a very dark night and in the middle of a storm. The night was rolling and no car went by, the storm was so strong he could hardly see a few feet ahead of him. Suddenly he saw a car coming towards him and stop.
The guy without thinking about it got in the car closes the door just to realize there's nobody behind the wheel. The car starts slowly, the guy looks at the road and sees a curve coming his way, scared he starts to pray begging for his life.
He's still praying and knows he's going to die, when just before he hits the curve, a hand appears through the window and moves the wheel. The guy, paralyzed in terror, watches how the hand appears every time they come to a curve.
The guy gathering his strength jumps out of the car and runs to the nearest town.
Wet and still in shock, he goes to a cantina and asks for two shots of tequila, and starts telling everybody about the horrible experience he went through.

Silence comes over everybody when they realize the guy was really scared and wasn't drunk.
About half an hour later two guys walked in the same cantina and one said to the other.....
" Look Pepe, that's the " NUT " that got in the car when we were pushing it. "

**********************************************************

   STOP !
IF YOU HEARD THIS ONE BEFORE

         

~ A SANDPIPER !!! ~
" TO BRING YOU JOY ! "

SHE HAD JUST TURNED SIX YEARS OLD
WHEN I FIRST MET HER ON THE BEACH NEAR WHERE
I LIVE. I DRIVE TO THIS BEACH, A
DISTANCE OF THREE OR FOUR MILES, WHENEVER THE WORLD
BEGINS TO CLOSE IN ON ME. SHE WAS BUILDING A
SANDCASTLE OR SOMETHING AND LOOKED UP, HER EYES AS
BLUE AS THE SEA.

" HELLO, " SHE SAID. I ANSWERED WITH A NOD, NOT REALLY
IN THE MOOD TO BOTHER WITH A SMALL CHILD. " I'M
BUILDING, " SHE SAID. " I SEE THAT. WHAT IS IT ? " I
ASKED, NOT CARING. OH, I DON'T KNOW, I JUST LIKE THE
FEEL OF SAND. " THAT SOUNDS GOOD, I THOUGHT, AND
SLIPPED OFF MY SHOES. A SANDPIPER GLIDED BY.

" THAT'S A JOY, " THE CHILD SAID.
" IT'S A WHAT ? "
" IT'S A JOY. MY MAMA SAYS SANDPIPERS COME TO BRING US
JOY. " THE BIRD WENT GLIDING DOWN THE BEACH.

GOOD-BYE JOY, I MUTTERED TO MYSELF, HELLO PAIN, AND
TURNED TO WALK ON. I WAS DEPRESSED; MY LIFE SEEMED
COMPLETELY OUT OF BALANCE.

" WHAT'S YOUR NAME ? " SHE WOULDN'T GIVE UP. " ROBERT, " I
ANSWERED. " I'M ROBERT PETERSON. "
" MINE'S WENDY.....I'M SIX. "
" HI, WENDY. " SHE GIGGLED. " YOU'RE FUNNY, " SHE SAID.

IN SPITE OF MY GLOOM, I LAUGHED TOO AND WALKED ON. HER
MUSICAL GIGGLE FOLLOWED ME.

" COME AGAIN, MR. P, " SHE CALLED. " WE'LL HAVE ANOTHER
HAPPY DAY. "

THE DAYS AND WEEKS THAT FOLLOWED BELONGED TO OTHERS : A
GROUP OF UNRULY BOY SCOUTS, PTA MEETINGS, AND AN
AILING MOTHER. THE SUN WAS SHINING ONE MORNING AS I
TOOK MY HANDS OUT OF THE DISHWATER. I NEED A
SANDPIPER, I SAID TO MYSELF, GATHERING UP MY COAT. THE
EVER-CHANGING BALM OF THE SEASHORE AWAITED ME. THE
BREEZE WAS CHILLY, BUT I STRODE ALONG, TRYING TO
RECAPTURE THE SERENITY I NEEDED.

" HELLO, MR. P, " SHE SAID. " DO YOU WANT TO PLAY ? "
" WHAT DID YOU HAVE IN MIND ? " I ASKED, WITH A TWINGE OF
ANNOYANCE.
" I DON'T KNOW, SHE SAID. "
" HOW ABOUT CHARADES ? " I ASKED SARCASTICALLY.
THE TINKLING LAUGHTER BURST FORTH AGAIN.
" I DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT IS. "
" THEN LET'S JUST WALK. " LOOKING AT HER, I NOTICED THE
DELICATE FAIRNESS OF HER FACE.
" WHERE DO YOU LIVE ? " I ASKED.
" OVER THERE. " SHE POINTED TOWARD A ROW OF SUMMER
COTTAGES. STRANGE, I THOUGHT, IN WINTER.

" WHERE DO YOU GO TO SCHOOL ? "
" I DON'T GO TO SCHOOL. MOMMY SAYS WE'RE ON VACATION. "
SHE CHATTERED AS WE STROLLED UP THE BEACH, BUT MY MIND
WAS ON OTHER THINGS. WHEN I LEFT FOR HOME, WENDY SAID
IT HAD BEEN A HAPPY DAY. FEELING SURPRISINGLY BETTER,
I SMILED AT HER AND AGREED.

THREE WEEKS LATER, I RUSHED TO MY BEACH IN A STATE OF
NEAR PANIC. I WAS IN NO MOOD TO EVEN GREET WENDY. I
THOUGHT I SAW HER MOTHER ON THE PORCH AND FELT LIKE
DEMANDING SHE KEEP HER CHILD AT HOME. " LOOK, IF YOU
DON'T MIND, " I SAID CROSSLY WHEN WENDY CAUGHT UP WITH
ME, " I'D RATHER BE ALONE TODAY. " SHE SEEMS UNUSUALLY
PALE AND OUT OF BREATH.

" WHY ? " SHE ASKED. I TURNED TO HER AND SHOUTED,
" BECAUSE MY MOTHER DIED ! " AND THOUGHT, MY GOSH, WHY
WAS I SAYING THIS TO A LITTLE CHILD ?
" OH, " SHE SAID QUIETLY, " THEN THIS IS A BAD DAY. "
" YES, " I SAID, " AND YESTERDAY AND THE DAY BEFORE
AND-OH, GO AWAY ! "
" DID IT HURT ? " SHE INQUIRED.
" DID WHAT HURT ? " I WAS EXASPERATED WITH HER, WITH
MYSELF.
" WHEN SHE DIED ? "
" OF COURSE IT HURT ! " I SNAPPED, MISUNDERSTANDING,
WRAPPED UP IN MYSELF. I STRODE OFF.

A MONTH OR SO AFTER THAT, WHEN I NEXT WENT TO THE
BEACH, SHE WASN'T THERE. FEELING GUILTY, ASHAMED AND
ADMITTING TO MYSELF I MISSED HER, I WENT UP TO THE
COTTAGE AFTER MY WALK AND KNOCKED AT THE DOOR. A DRAWN
LOOKING YOUNG WOMAN WITH HONEY-COLORED HAIR OPENED THE
DOOR.

" HELLO, " I SAID, " I'M ROBERT PETERSON. I MISSED YOUR
LITTLE GIRL TODAY AND WONDERED WHERE SHE WAS. "

" OH YES, MR. PETERSON, PLEASE COME IN. WENDY SPOKE OF
YOU SO MUCH. I'M AFRAID I ALLOWED HER TO BOTHER YOU.
IF SHE WAS A NUISANCE, PLEASE, ACCEPT MY APOLOGIES. "

" NOT AT ALL-SHE'S A DELIGHTFUL CHILD. " I SAID,
SUDDENLY REALIZING THAT I MEANT WHAT I HAD JUST SAID.

" WENDY DIED LAST WEEK, MR. PETERSON. SHE HAD LEUKEMIA.
MAYBE SHE DIDN'T TELL YOU. "

STRUCK DUMB, I GROPED FOR A CHAIR. I HAD TO CATCH MY
BREATH.
" SHE LOVED THIS BEACH SO WHEN SHE ASKED TO COME, WE
COULDN'T SAY NO. SHE SEEMED SO MUCH BETTER HERE AND
HAD A LOT OF WHAT SHE CALLED HAPPY DAYS. BUT THE LAST
FEW WEEKS, SHE DECLINED RAPIDLY....." HER
VOICE FALTERED, " SHE LEFT SOMETHING FOR YOU..... IF
ONLY I CAN FIND
IT. COULD YOU WAIT A MOMENT WHILE I LOOK ? "

I NODDED STUPIDLY, MY MIND RACING FOR SOMETHING, TO
SAY TO THIS LOVELY YOUNG WOMAN. SHE HANDED ME A
SMEARED ENVELOPE, WITH MR. P PRINTED IN BOLD CHILDISH
LETTERS. INSIDE WAS A DRAWING IN BRIGHT CRAYON HUES-A
YELLOW BEACH, A BLUE SEA, AND A BROWN BIRD. UNDERNEATH
WAS CAREFULLY PRINTED :

A SANDPIPER TO BRING YOU JOY.

TEARS WELLED UP IN MY EYES AND A HEART THAT HAD ALMOST
FORGOTTEN TO LOVE OPENED WIDE. I TOOK WENDY'S MOTHER
IN MY ARMS. " I'M SO SORRY, I'M SO SORRY, I'M SO
SORRY, " I MUTTERED OVER AND OVER, AND WE WEPT
TOGETHER.

THE PRECIOUS LITTLE PICTURE IS FRAMED NOW AND HANGS IN
MY STUDY. SIX WORDS - ONE FOR EACH YEAR OF HER LIFE -
THAT SPEAK TO ME OF HARMONY, COURAGE, AND UNDEMANDING
LOVE. A GIFT FROM A CHILD WITH SEA-BLUE EYES AND HAIR
THE COLOR OF SAND - WHO TAUGHT ME THE GIFT OF LOVE.

NOTE : THIS IS A TRUE STORY SENT OUT BY ROBERT
PETERSON. IT SERVES AS A REMINDER TO ALL OF US THAT WE
NEED TO TAKE TIME TO ENJOY LIVING AND LIFE AND EACH
OTHER. THE PRICE OF HATING OTHER HUMAN BEINGS IS
LOVING ONESELF LESS. LIFE IS SO COMPLICATED, THE
HUSTLE AND BUSTLE OF EVERYDAY TRAUMAS CAN MAKE US LOSE
FOCUS ABOUT WHAT IS TRULY IMPORTANT OR WHAT IS ONLY A
MONETARY SETBACK OR CRISIS. TAKE A MOMENT.....EVEN IF IT
IS ONLY TEN SECONDS, TO STOP AND SMELL THE
ROSES.

THERE ARE NO COINCIDENCES !
EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENS TO US HAPPENS FOR A REASON.
NEVER BRUSH ASIDE ANYONE AS INSIGNIFICANT.
WHO KNOWS WHAT THEY CAN TEACH US ?
THEY MAY EVEN TEACH US TO LOVE....... ALL OVER
AGAIN!!!!!

A SANDPIPER TO BRING YOU JOY !!!!

**********************************************************

   STOP !
IF YOU HEARD THIS ONE BEFORE

" CREDIT "
FOR FINDING THIS MESS
GOES TO THE FOLLOWING FOLK'S  

~ ANITA MARIE ~  ~ PASTOR BILL ~  ~ LIL BRUDDER ~
If there is a complaint, advise or critical comment, these three folk's above are responsible for finding all of the above stories on the internet.
My daughter, Anita, Me, Pastor Bill and My brother, Jack.
~ GOD BLESS YOU ~
P.S. THIS GROUP DOES NOT ACCEPT COMPLAINTS
AS IT COULD BE DANGEROUS TO OUR HEALTH
DUE TO OUR OLD AGE, THANK YOU !

**********************************************************


~ ~ ~ AND ~ ~ ~



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by the Holy Spirit's Leading !


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~ GLOOMBUSTERS # 17 CONTINUED ~
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* * * A DIFFERENCE ! * * *

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JUST THINK, RIGHT NOW YOU COULD BE ENJOYING
THE OZARK HILLS WEATHER IN BEAUTIFUL DOWNTOWN:

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PASTOR

CrossDaily.com

A Vote From Y'all
Is Worth Crowing About
Thank You, Pastor Bill  

PLEASE, PLEASE,
DON'T GET MAD OR UPSET
WE ALL NEED A LITTLE * * * HAPPINESS * * *
IN OUR LIVES, BUT
I'LL TRY TO BE GOOD !
NEXT TIME.
BUT HERE IS ONE SURE THING : " I'M HAPPY ! "
YUP, YUP, I SURE WILL TRY !