Here is my ever-growing collection of some of the best clean money jokes that I've come across. To the best of my knowledge, these are just jokes and are not based on actual facts; so try not to be too offended if you have fallen victim to similar circumstances. At any rate, feel free to send me any jokes that you may have, and I'll post them here as well.

Click Below for a Printable Version of a Joke: Back to Home Page Back to Main Jokes Page Selling Bibles New Barbie Doll Rich Man Paying the Bill Back to Main Jokes Page Back to Main Page

Home Selling Bibles      This door-to-door entrepreneur became rather bored with his job of selling Bibles, so he decided to become a boss, hiring three people to sell Bibles for him. He interviewed three people. The first came in and said, "I want to sell Bibles for you." "OK, you're hired. Here's your kit; go sell!"      The second came in and said, "I want to sell Bibles for you." "OK, you're hired! Here's your kit; go sell!"      The third came in and said, "I- i - I wa - wa- wa-want t-t-t-t-to s-s-s-s-ell to sell, to sell, to sell, Bi - bi - bi - Bibles, sell Bi -Bibles f-f-f-fo-for y-y-y-y you Bibles for you!"      "No," shouted the man, "this will never work! You can't sell Bibles for me!" The applicant replied, "B-b-b-b-but I r-r-r-eall, but I really, really, n-n-n-n-need th-th-th-this, really need tthis job!"      As there were no other applicants, he man said, "OK, I'll give you one shot at this, but I expect you to PRODUCE!"      At the end of the day, the first applicant comes back and reports, "I sold 8 Bibles today." The second reports: "I sold 11 Bibles today. The third worker reports, "To-to-to-to t-t-today, I-i-I so- so, I so-, I so-, I so- I sold 28 Bi- bi- b- bibles!" "Great," says the man. "However, I want you to sell lots more Bibles than that, so get out there tomorrow and MAKE ME SOME MONEY!"      At the end of the next day, the first worker comes in and reports, "Today, I sold 32 Bibles." The second worker reports, "I sold 44 Bibles today" The third worker reports, "To-to-to t-today, I-i-I so- so, I so-, I sold 79 Bi-bi-bi- sold 79, sold 79 Bibles."      "Fantastic," said the man, "since you're doing so well, so much better than these other two bums, why don't you tell them what your sales technique is." Replied the worker, "I-i-I j-j-j-j-ju-ju-ju-just wa, wa, wa, just wal- wa- wa- walk, just walk up to up to up to just walk up to them and and ask, them and ask, them and ask if th-th-th-th ask if they w-w-w-w-w- wa- ask if they want t-t-t-t-o-o- if they want to b--b-b-b-b if they want to buy a Bi-bi - want to buy a Bi--b--a - a- abi - buy a to buy a Bi-bi-bible, or d-d-d-d-d do th-th-they do they w-w-w-ant me to ***READ*** it to 'em?" The New Barbie Doll      A guy walks into the Toys-R-Us toy shop in downtown New York and says to the assistant: "Could you please show me your Barbie dolls?"      She says, "Certainly, sir. Here, we have: Fashion Barbie at $15.95 Vacation Barbie at $15.95 Housewife Barbie at $15.95 and Divorcee Barbie at $215.95!"      The guy asks in astonishment, "Why is divorcee Barbie so much? She looks the same to me."      The assistant answers, "Well, sir, divorcee Barbie comes complete with Ken's car, Ken's house, Ken's etc. etc. Rich Man      A young man asked an old rich man how he made his money.      The old guy fingered his worsted wool vest and said, "Well, son, it was 1932. The depth of the Great Depression. I was down to my last nickel. I invested that nickel in an apple. I spent the entire day polishing the apple and, at the end of the day, I sold the apple for ten cents.      The next morning, I invested those ten cents in two apples. I spent the entire day polishing them and sold them at 5:00 pm for 20 cents. I continued this system for a month, by the end of which I'd accumulated a fortune of $1.37.      Then my wife's father died and left us two million dollars." Paying the Bill      Walking up to a department store's fabric counter, a pretty girl asked, "I want to buy this material for a new dress. How much does it cost?"      "Only a kiss a yard," replied the smirking male clerk.      "That's fine," replied the girl. "I'll take ten yards."      With expectation and anticipation written all over his face, the clerk hurriedly measured out and wrapped the cloth, then held it out teasingly.      The girl snapped up the package and pointed to a little old man standing beside her. "Grandpa will pay the bill," she smiled.   Home