Q. Dear Alice,
My lover and I have been together for sometime now. We had a wonderfull sex life and we were very attracted to one anither and now it seems like he no longer feels that attraction. What should I do to bring that spark that we had back?
Sighned
Confussed
A.
Dear Confused,
Your problem is a very normal and common problem. Remember that you are not alone in this common dilemma. There are many things you can do. But it depends on what the situation involves. Has there been any changes in your or his life that could have effected your relationship?
Changes can occur and those changes can be worked out most of the time.
Communication is the number one most important thing you can do.
Try to talk to him about how to spice your sex life up.
Common factor is that after a while of being together, you get into a rut.
You might want to consider going on a pic-nic in the park or at the beach.
Remember what you both enjoyed when you first started dating and try to bring that back.
Some honey and spice on the nipples could be just what would do the trick to bring back some of the spice. Other ingredients you might want to consider would be: Peanut butter, jelly, chocolate syprup, strawberries & whip cream, etc. What ever he and you would like.
Also, remember to compromise, maybe you do not like whip cream but if he does, let him doing the licking of the cream! Oh, cream........hmmmmm.
Also, do not be afraid to experiment with wilder sex like S&M, spankings, toys, watersports, role play, costumes and other fantasies.
As you get older, rather you are in a relationship or not, sex can get dull if you're not willing to experiment and grow. Sexual experimentation is a life-long growing experience, not just for start-outs. Remind him of this fact too.
Let me know if any of this helps, and if it doesn't, send me a picture, LOL.
Well, me and Cowboy is headed to bed soon,
Take Care,
Love,
Alice
Q. Dear Alice,
My lover and I have been together for 10 years. We have grown apart and I suspect that he is cheating on me now. He denies it but I'm sure he is. What should I do? Signed, Broken hearted.
A. Dear Broken Hearted,
You really have two problems. First, you said that you have grown apart. So, you really need to decide if the relationship is still worth it. The fact that you wrote me says maybe you still think it is worth it. You need to communicate with him about your feelings of growing apart. Share this with him and see what you can do about it together. Many people with relationships as long as yours come to this moment when the relationship and feelings dull. This is natural and comes with time. If the two of you agree that it's still worth a try, you need to do two things. 1. Either trust him or prove his cheating (of which case, you may want to consider an open relationship OR throw him the hell out). 2. Spice things up a bit.
When was the last time you had a candlelight dinner, picnic on the ground, breakfast in bed, sex in the car, television in bed with candles, shower together, ice cubes, etc.
So, First think, think, talk, communicate and think again. IS it worth it? Can the two of you last with an open relationship with established rules? IS he really cheating or are you paranoid because you're growing apart? The key is communication and catching him in the act if it's true!
Q. Dear Alice,
I love wearing panty hose but my lover doesn't know it. I'm afraid he'll think I'm too sissy for him. I feel guilty hiding it from him. Please tell me what to do!
A. Dear Private Panties,
If he loves you, he will learn to accept it whether he likes it or not. But maybe you will be surprised! Maybe it will turn him on! IF he's very straight acting or masucline, you could pretend to be his girl. Try it honey, Communicate and share! Good Luck.