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From: SWELKER@delphi.com Subject: HUMOR: B5 Movie Spinoff Titles
"Hunter/Prey MXLIVV" :Roy Scheinder(sp?).The EA hires special
agent Brody to destroy a planet-consuming device disguised as a Great
White Shark. Brody's comment to Sheridan:"You're gonna need a bigger
Station." From: Eric Huber
How could you forget the hauntingly beautiful _Kiss of the Spiderwoman in
the Web_, in which we finally discover the bisexual character, controlled
by 13? Or _A Race through Forever Dark Places_ where Ironheart's gift
causes Talia to dress in tight black body armor and kick the stuffing out
of Bester. Bester: "Telepathic freak? Terrorizes? Vait'll dey get a
load of me!" Then there was _The Quality of Mercy II_ with Kennith
Branaugh (sp?) as Antonio, the Merchant of Babylon. Garibaldi successfully
defends him from a strange alien who wants `All his organs removed,
nearest the heart'. Though we should really forget _There All Honor Truely
Lies_, with Arnold's brief appearance as an Earth Alliance special agent.
From: DTD94001@UConnVM.UConn.Edu Love Story...with Deleen and Sheridan
"Love means never having to say you're Minbari" From: ez007560@rocky.ucdavis.edu
(Morris Skupinsky) TKO-1138: George Lucas' OTHER college film in which a
Jewish boxer living in a sterile world without identity where everthing is
white and the government controls everyone with drugs which he one day
stops taking. He then starts to feel bad about the recent death of his
father and and enters an alien fighting tournament as a part of a bizzare
mourning practice. Claudia Christian plays the supporting role of the
"nice" fight promoter, who also stops taking her drugs and
decides to bring fairness and good sportsmanship to the most brutal game
known. From: Bruce Lewis
"Zocalo!" Sheridan's in love, and Amabassador Delenn is the
object of his affections. Seeking to impress her, he decides to stage an
all-singing, all- dancing musical salute to the Minbari on the Zocalo. But
a jealous Lennier has other plans! David Hasselhoff guests and sings his
own songs. "Days of Aww" It's Yom Kippur 5999, and Ivanova can't
eat for a whole day. Unfortunately, it also happens to be Garibaldi's
birthdayïand he's invited her to the barbeque! Can she politely refuse
without hurting his feelings? Richard Belzer guest-stars as visiting
"Rabbi Schulweiss". "Animal Station" B5 is invaded by
an alien swarm of drunken college students! It's Spring Break 2269, and
suddenly Garibaldi is up to his ears in fraternity-boy hijinks!
Unfortunately for Sheridan, the Galactic Conference of Teetotalers are
having their annual convention on B5 at the same time and if they aren't
kept happy, heads will roll! From: am848@yfn.ysu.edu (Ann M. Williams) B5
the musical: Morden sings "Me and My Shadow." Londo sings
"Macho Man" complete with gold chains. From: mstewart@whale.st.usm.edu
(Michael James Stewart) _A Race Through Dark Trading Places_: Londo and
G'Kar make a bet about "Nature vs. Nurture" and test it by
replacing Talia with a young Lurker girl, who then ruins the ambassadors
by investing all their worth in the Markab stock market. I also came up
with a couple of computer-related ones... _A Tycoon in the Wilderness_:
Our intrepid crew journeys to the center of a dead planet to find that
Bill Gates became the ultimate Plug-n-Play peripheral for Windows2095.
_Compression and Lamentations_: Chaos reigns on the station after Tech #2
unwittingly loads a buggy beta of Stacker v147 into the main computer,
corrupting Ivanova's files. Sheridan talks her out of killing him only by
agreeing to make him pitch against the Narn baseball team in the upcoming
all-station tournament. Lennier bemoans the fate of the thousands of
little creatures he's found in an ancient Earth computer game, Lemmings,
after he discovers that they have Minbari sprites. From: ggodwin@cybernetics.net
(Greg Godwin) In The Dark Shadows of Z'ha'dum: Sheridan goes to Z'ha'dum
and awakens a 500 year old vampire named Barnabas Collins. Soul Food
Hunter: A member of an alien older searches the universe for ancient
ethnic dishes. Knives, Forks, and Spoons: A friend of Londo's seeks his
help in trying to divorce his own three wives from arranged marriages. Back
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