Sitting on the couch. Looking forward to a new episode of the US WLiiA because all the guides said it would be new. Imagine my surprise as Drew is walking down the aisle after the players intros, and I recognize the audience member that Wayne pulled up on stage when he was playing a sadistic Marine Sargent during a game of Weird Newscasters last season. As the show went on, I didn't mind that it was a repeat since I realized that I hadn't seen it before. When I went to check the episode guides to log the tape, I was stunned to discover that this was a NEW third season show made from a second season taping. This may very well be a network first — a show produced for the current season made from a taping of a prior season. Who knows. It might even be an industry first. Whatever it is; it's certainly a mind-blower.

Cast: Wayne Brady, Chip Esten, Colin Mochrie, Ryan Stiles, and Drew Carey

Superheroes: crisis = pit bulls running loose; Colin = Dog Catcher Boy; Ryan = Body Parts Constantly Falling Asleep Boy; Chip = Captain Cossack; Wayne = the Tae Bo Kid
Drew: "Dog Catcher Boy! Pit bulls are running all over the place! What are you gonna do?" Colin: "I don't know." Actually, Colin lied there. Colin knew exactly what to do. Catch a shiatsu, step on it, and wear it as a toupee. (I get the feeling that Colin doesn't like small animals too much. He's always killing them.) As for the pit bull problem itself, well, he's going to need his friends to help him. And in comes a one-handed Ryan to help. He would have arrived sooner, but without his right hand, he couldn't catch a cab. Colin: "Thank God, you've come, Body Parts Constantly Falling Asleep Boy!" And Ryan is more stunned by his name than I have ever seen him before. But once Ryan recovered, his performance as Body Parts Constantly Falling Asleep Boy became one of my favorite superheroes. (Except for the name. That's WAY too long!) Ryan might not be much help in a crisis as he becomes slowly paralyzed, but it was fun to watch. And except for a brief moment to brace himself as he fell to the floor, Ryan never revealed that missing right hand. He kept the original gag going throughout the entire game.

Chip flies in; fortunately before Ryan's mouth fell asleep. Oh, it's Captain Cossack! Here's a piece of advice, Chip. That Cossack kick dance you were trying to do works much better if you don't try to kick both legs out from under you at the same time. Kick one leg out. Bring it back. THEN kick the other leg out. You'll manage to stay on your feet better. Trust me. Of course, if you don't want to take my advice, you can always sit down on the step and kick your legs. Oh, you figured that one out by yourself. Nicely done. And a great name for Wayne, By the way. Tae Bo Kid. Clever. Wayne, you're not supposed to attack the other superheroes even if you are the Tae Bo Kid. They're your friends. I liked how Colin defended himself with his toupee. Did you notice that Colin had brought the dog back after siccing him on Wayne, but Wayne kept the dog to strangle it? Colin picked up on the misplay and let Wayne continue with his strangling mime and then grabbed the dog back a second time. For once, I like Wayne's solution to the crisis. Teaching the pit bull's discipline through Tae Bo. Yea. I want to see that happen. Chip's exit line was great. "I wasn't much help, but I'll drink a lot of vodka." And poor Ryan, can't get the door open because his one remaining hand has fallen asleep. Thank goodness Captain Cossack came back to help. As the guys are walking back to their seats, you can see Ryan talking to Colin who makes this "I dunno" motion with his hands. Don't you just know that Ryan is asking Colin where on earth he came up with that fantastic (but way too long) name.

Duet: Chip and Wayne sing to Phyllis as the BeeGees
I've said before that there are very few song styles, duets, or whatever they're calling it, games on my replay list. But this one is going on that short but sweet list. Phyllis from Niagara Falls, Canada. (I don't think any of the cast picked up on the Canadian aspect because no one mentioned it that I could hear.) It was nice to see all four men helping her to the stool. And to hear Chip tell her, "We're not going to hurt you." I certainly hope not, Chip. The audience booing at Drew's age joke nearly drowned out his apology to her. Actually, I should say half an apology. He got halfway through saying "Sorry" then stopped. Probably because Phyllis obviously thought the joke was as funny as Drew did. In fact, Phyllis was having the time of her life throughout the whole experience. Blushing like a schoolgirl who's embarrassed and thrilled at the same time, Phyllis was a joy to watch. Almost as much fun to watch as Ryan who was once again thoroughly embarrassed by his co-workers actions. Especially Chip's. And is anyone else dying to know what Colin said to Ryan that made both of them collapse in their chairs? There are times when I wish I could control whose microphone audio I hear. That is definitely one of those times. The guys were so sweet to Phyllis after the song. Chip asking her "How are you doing?" Drew escorting her back to her chair. And Phyllis loving every minute of it. After this game, I'm inclined to believe Drew might have been right. Drew does have the best job in the world.

Scenes from a Hat: [scenes = pick-up lines that are doomed to fail; things to say that will always start a fight; the shortest book ever written; disturbing sayings found on your grandmother's knitted throw pillows; what they really talk about in football huddles; newspaper headlines we'd like to see]
Scenes from a Hat has become one of my favorite games in the US version. And I was pleased with this playing too. Colin's Ryan slam ("I play Lewis on the Drew Carey Show") surprised me because Colin usually saves his Ryan insults for games like Narrate. (I was even more surprised by Drew's reaction to the slam until I remembered that since Drew co-created the show, he's partially responsible for Lewis' character.) Ryan's things to say that will always start a fight sounded more like a Colin joke than an Ryan joke. Colin is usually the one who will explicitly repeat the game instruction turning it into a joke. Not Ryan. (Remember the Alamo Whose Line game instruction — Colin is "losing his nerve"? Colin's first line to Ryan: "I'm losing my nerve." Or the landing a plane Whose Line from the UK — Ryan is some sort of "washed up" pilot? Colin's opening line "Have you finished washing up?")

I noticed that Chip's shortest book entry got more laughs from the UK WLiiA veterans than from the audience itself. Maybe the audience really isn't familiar with the state of British dentistry. (Ryan: "We're considered studs over there because we have all our teeth.") But if the audience didn't quite get Chip's joke, it certainly got Ryan's "Drew Carey's Acting Tips". (I admit to being a little slow to figure out what Drew meant by his "Hope you like the inside of your trailer" reply; but I did get it.) Chip had a nicely delivered football huddle line. Ryan's was good as well. And bald men the world over rejoiced at Colin's newspaper headline. Good game throughout.

Whose Line: Ryan = Robin Hood; Colin = Maid Marian
Sweeddlely deedlely dee! Oh, sweedely deedlely don't! In just those two nonsense lines, Ryan and Colin demonstrated why they work so well together. Perfectly timed and nicely nuanced. I liked this game even it wasn't the funniest Whose Line they've done. Ryan's accent flickering in and out like a not quite screwed in light bulb. (But for once, Ryan's accent was better than Colin's who didn't really try to pull one off.) Ryan wearing only a tunic and tights with Colin wearing layer after layer of clothing. (Very period for a female. And did you notice that Ryan never put the tunic back on? Just the tights.) Colin originally playing the stuff a turkey line as if he was offended then quickly changing to play it as if he was seduced. Ryan mispronouncing giblets. Then Ryan tripping over "Friar Tuck can marry us in that place where we live back in the woods". Lots of good moments in this game. By the way, I thought the idea of Drew pulling a line out of his pocket was a nice idea for a joke, but he blew the illusion of reading from the paper when he started the line but turned the paper upside down midway through. If he was really reading the line from the paper, he couldn't have started it before turning the paper — which is what Ryan had to do for one of his lines, if you remember.

Greatest Hits: Songs of Women; Ryan and Colin sell; Chip and Wayne sing
I don't want to know what phone book lists women in its yellow pages. Don't tell me. I just don't want to know. The cast members seemed genuinely surprised at the idea of songs of women. Maybe they had a suspicion as to what kind of trouble that topic could get them into. (More on that in a moment.) Further proof that the censors have eased up on the restrictions this season came from Colin's opening line "Alien Oddities: ET the Extra Testicle". I doubt that would have passed the censors last season. I'm not sure why Colin decided to go the hypnosis route after carrying on about liking women. Was it because Ryan wasn't jumping in when Colin expected him to? Had Colin just run out of things to say? Whatever the reason, I was extremely impressed that Ryan could almost recite his opening speech word for word after coming out of hypnosis. I say almost. He did get a couple of small things wrong. Originally, he said, "For as long as men have walked this planet, women have walked it too" but the second time Ryan said, "For as long as men have walked this planet, women have walked it with them". Also, he dropped Colin's name from his "I don't know about you, Colin, but I love 'em" on the second go. (Speaking of second go's, I think Colin was surprised that Ryan reran the intro from the beginning. He probably expected Ryan to just pick up from where they stopped.)

But after all that, we finally get to the first song, "Hey, what's that?". (Well, we get to it after Wayne and Chip stop laughing because they both started singing the exact same thing simultaneously which in improvised songs is probably startlingly rare.) And we get a song about liposuction more than about women. True, Chip is singing about performing liposuction on a woman because she's so fat. But most of the song is about Chip and Wayne wondering what came through the suction tube. (More on that in a moment.) Question: what did Wayne mean by the letters T R A? Colin's Sting / Stung was truly a groaner of a joke. Oh, it was painful.

If Colin was surprised that Ryan reran the intro after coming out of hypnosis, Ryan was surprised when Colin put him back in hypnosis after tripping over his words. (You can hear Ryan do that sniffling laugh he does when he's surprised and trying hard not to laugh.) When Ryan awakens, he introduces a song that is clearly and definitely about women, "She's all mine" but he claims it's a Louis Jordan song. Louis Jordan was a French singer known for his ballads and for starring in the musical Gigi. Whatever Chip and Wayne sang, it wasn't a French ballad. (One poster suggested the style was more like Louis Prima.¹) It was however about women. (More on that in a moment.)

I guess Ryan figured that if Colin can make him sleep, then Ryan can make Colin a chicken. But, no luck. Then, Colin starts introducing one of his favorite song styles, Zydeco. A favorite because it begins with a Z and ends with a vowel. And that's the full extent of what I know about Zydeco. Since Chip sang a verse in fake French, maybe it's a French style? I'm just guessing. But did you notice the title of the song, "Hot Hot Fever; Cold Cold Chills"? Hmmm.

Maybe it's time for that "moment" I've been mentioning. Let's talk about a taping briefly. Based on the taping descriptions I've read, Greatest Hits is only played once during a taping although they will perform nearly twice as many songs as actually air. The companion episode that we saw last season had a Greatest Hits game in it. Songs of the Doctor. So where did Songs of Women come from? I think the Songs of Women game is actually the false start of what eventually became Songs of the Doctor. They probably started out with songs of women, hosed it up either through getting into censorship problems or that Louis Jordan style mis-name, then restarted the game with the new topic of Songs of the Doctor. The Doctor song intros and songs made it into the earlier episode. The Women song intros, the She's All Mine song, plus the leftover doctor songs (Hey, What's That? and Hot Hot Fever; Cold Cold Chills) were combined into what we saw for this episode. So this Greatest Hits is somewhat of a Frankenstein's monster built from bits and pieces of failed intros and left-over songs. But you know something? I don't care. I still liked it. A lot.

Three-Headed Broadway Star: Wayne, Drew, and Ryan sing "Don't Touch My Blowhole"
I'm not sure exactly what the audience member said who suggested the toilet for the Broadway musical, but I liked Ryan's response — "More like a comment, really". As for the Blowhole song — I liked it too. I've never seen anyone achieve a vibrato by manually wiggling the lips the way Ryan did. But I admit it was effective. There were a few mistakes along the way, though. All of them genuine, I believe. Some of the confusion arose from the obvious "Is blowhole two words? It's one, right?" But there was also some confusion at the end where Drew sang "won't" but Ryan heard "want". So the real lyric became "I won't you". As Drew said in the Best Of episode: It's not as easy as it looks.

Credits: Wayne and Chip = two old Vaudeville performers
In the midst of the chaos, I noticed that Chip got in a particularly and appropriately bad pun using Arthur Forrest's name: "Watch out for my Arthur. It's in the Forrest." I don't think Chip knew what Ryan was doing by grabbing unto his neck until he saw Colin do the hook act with Wayne. This reading was slightly more fun than the usual US reading but not one of its best.

Best Game:
I'm going to go with Superheroes here. Superheroes is a game that ought to descend into delightful anarchy by the time all four heroes are on stage in my opinion. And this one did. Ryan flopping on the top step. Wayne Tae Bo-ing everyone in sight. Chip trying to stay vertical while kicking both legs out from under him. And Colin attacking Wayne with his toupee. (Plus coming up with a real winner of a superpower for Ryan.) Sweet chaos abounds.

Overall Comments:
Well, you can probably guess that I really enjoyed this episode. I'm not sure why some of these games didn't make it into the real second season. But that's okay. Season 2. Season 3. It really doesn't matter to me when I see the games. All that matters is that I get to see them.

© LKK 12/03/00

Footnotes:
¹ A gentle reader informed me that in addition to the French ballad singer named Louis Jordan, there was also a singer in the 1940s named Louis Jordan who specialized in swing and jump style songs. The reader suggested that this was the Louis Jordan that Wayne and Chip were imitating. I agree.

© LKK 08/17/02