Sitting down and expecting a new episode. Hi Greg! Long time no see! Hmm, Wayne's changed his hairstyle. Colin? Is that you? Oh My God! I'm watching a Season 1 episode. Cool. I thought ABC had disavowed all knowledge of Season 1. I wonder if it's one of the very few that I've seen before. Boy, am I glad that the show's lighting design changed in Season 2. Not to mention Drew's overly long show intro. Good, the first game. Check the episode guides. I don't see this game listed anywhere. Oh, my stars. Another new show from a previous season!

Cast: Greg Proops, Wayne Brady, Colin Mochrie, Ryan Stiles, and Drew Carey

Let's Make a Date: Greg = contestant; Wayne = movie trailer voice over; Colin = terrified turkey just before Thanksgiving; Ryan = pair of jealous redneck twins
Wayne does an excellent movie trailer voice, but he makes no effort to tie the trailer in with the question Greg asked. ("Where would you take me shopping?") In fact, he doesn't even relate it to the Let's Make a Date game concept at all. I guess that's something he learned to do in later episodes. (Now, if only he'd start tying his Weird Newscasters quirk in with sports more. But I digress.) I'm not sure where he was going in the second round with those didididdi noises. Greg didn't seem sure either. Do you think Wayne was trying for some ticker tape sound? Colin's turkey was the highlight of the game for me. Greg seemed to know exactly what Colin was from the very first Hello. If he didn't know, then that holiday question was an impressive coincidence. You can tell that most of the audience was still new to WLiiA performances. The idea of a man sitting on a spool playing a turkey (and doing it very convincingly) still had the element of the new and novel to them. Colin's response to "wishbone" in the second round was a beaut. Running around, knees together, clutching his crotch to keep from being pulled about. It may not have been anatomically correct, but it was funny. Ryan managed to keep a straight face throughout. Wayne didn't quite manage. Ryan's pair of redneck twins was definitely the most difficult quirk to guess. I don't blame Greg for not getting it. Ryan did make a good effort to indicate that he was playing two people. And Greg did get that concept. But the idea of jealous twins is probably too advanced to portray is two quick rounds. (I liked how Ryan killed the turkey and started plucking it at the end. I wonder when Ryan and Colin started interacting in Let's Make a Date games like that because they didn't in the early UK games.) Finally, it might not have been as good as the old Greg and Clive banter, but we did get an echo of that fun when Greg popped in "No! I'd rather go have a beer, Drew, if it's all the same to you." Greg should speak up like that more often. I miss it.

Multiple Personalities: Ryan, Colin, and Greg lost in a mall [map = Elvis Presley; canteen = John Wayne; binoculars = Beavis and Butthead]
Poor Colin. Impressions are probably his weakest skill. (Even weaker than singing.) He wanted to and even started to pass off the canteen to Ryan until he remembered that he had already given away the map. Colin said exactly three lines the entire game. One per impersonation. ("We've been walking around in circles." "I'm hyperventilating." "Well, yeah. I know.") Ryan's Elvis Presley and John Wayne were on par with ones he's done in the past. But what happened to his Beavis and Butthead??? Had it been so long since he'd done them that he'd forgotten? Even he was surprised at his less than stellar performance. 500 sympathy points to Colin and him. For sure. Greg doesn't get any sympathy points, though. He doesn't need them. Greg has always been a strong amateur impressionist. With the possible exception of Wayne, perhaps the strongest of the WLiiA players. (I'm excepting Rory Bremner because he's a professional impressionist — and I'm not going to go into a discussion as to why I called Greg an "amateur" impressionist here. I'll save that for another time if you really want to discuss it.) So it wasn't any surprise that he dominated this game. I was especially pleased with how Greg could take the whole lost in the mall idea and invent character-based dialogue that related to being lost. (Colin could only repeat famous lines as opposed to inventing new dialogue in the impersonation style, for example.) Greg definitely ruled this game up unto the final joke when Ryan ended up with all three personalities. John Wayne's walk. Elvis Presley's voice. Beavis and Butthead's laugh. A nice performance from Ryan that made up for his weak Beavis and Butthead before. Two small comments. One, did you notice that the lenses on the binoculars were blacked out to prevent a reflection? Two, are there still Orange Julius stands in malls? All the ones where I live had been closed for over a decade. I miss them.

Hats: Ryan and Colin; Greg and Wayne
There were some nice entries in this game. And some entries that I don't think would have passed the first season's censors. Greg's Ewok adventure was clever. But Greg, you should know by now that the man with the buzzer will always be louder than you. Wayne's chocolate chip joke was good; his safe sex one struck me as potential censorship material in a prior season. Colin's use the force joke was just okay; but what a bizarre looking hat that was. Turning the dreadlocks looking wig into a joke about Medusa might have been too obscure a reference for most of the crowd, but I liked it. Ryan's army helmet was a good start; his boxing gloves joke was very funny, and I thought his help me with my hose joke would not have made it through the censors before. I liked this round better than some other rounds of this game I've seen.

Interlude: If you're worried about the score, you really don't get the show, do you?
Well, I liked it. Made a nice change from the usual points don't matter joke we get after a commercial break.

Props: Greg and Wayne = yard-long foam strip with foam cones along 1 side; Ryan and Colin = 2 children's crawl-through tunnels
(Editing comment — I wouldn't put a Props game immediately after a Hats game even with a commercial between the two. To me, those games are too weak to have one right after the other.) Drew was busy reading his card, so he didn't seem to notice Greg's expression when he picked up the prop. Otherwise, we probably would have gotten some reaction out of Drew. But I thought Greg's expression, full of uncertainty and caution, was a nice performance. The jokes that Greg and Wayne got were on the average for the most part. Wayne's rocker and the Statue of Liberty brought a small smile. The goosebumps and Mr. T were funnier. My favorite was Greg's "These spikes are for your pleasure". Given where Greg was holding the prop when he said the line, I suspect we have another candidate for censorship in previous seasons.

Ryan and Colin had the more interesting prop ideas this time. The Titanic is an old standby. But the bouncing up and bounce to simulate waves was a nice touch. Colin's "experiments with maggots" line amused Ryan. And Ryan returned the favor by amusing Colin with his "feels like spring" line. How long do you think it took Ryan to get into those tunnels for his "Hey, the 70s may be dead to you" joke? And two for the censor to ponder. The condom joke and the "you're right; yours is longer" joke. (Watch Ryan's face. He knew as soon as he said that, that the line was a candidate for censoring.) Not to mention Ryan's reaction to Drew's "1000 points to Ryan and Colin for just dragging those things around." Yes, I'm sure we would have seen that in Season 1. Not.

One final comment. Did you notice that Ryan and Colin's props were clipped together on one edge when Drew handed them to the guys? They took the clips off and put them on the Party Quirks step where you can occasionally see them throughout the game. At the end of the game, Ryan picked them up, carried them back to the desk, and tossed them offstage with the props. Ryan keeps his stage so neat and tidy, don't you think?

Dead Bodies: Braveheart; Ryan = evil lord; Sara (audience member) = Braveheart's captured wife; Greg = Braveheart; Colin moves bodies
Did you catch Colin's expression as Sara gets into her original dead position? It's that puzzled, what are you going to do next, expression we see so frequently at the beginning of Moving People games. Both Ryan and Sara undie to listen to Drew give the game description. And exactly how many times do you think he had to say that intro before he got it right? Seemed to me that he was having a lot of trouble getting the intro out. (Didn't help matters that Ryan was laughing at him doing it.) Well, to be fair to Drew, Clive had a lot of problems with this game description in his early days too. When Sara first sat down (after almost ending up in Ryan's chair), Colin bent down and whispered something to her. Probably explaining what he wanted her to do. I think he forgot the part about not being completely limp. Colin was obviously unprepared to have Sara go totally limp during the game. It's a wonder he didn't violate some private parts while trying to manipulate her. Actually, Colin came real close to having his own Melissa moment in this game. When he sets Sara back in the chair after her exotic dancing, his arm brushes along her T-shirt nearly exposing her right breast. The shirt stays that way through most of the game. I doubt Colin ever knew how close he came to providing Sara with a coming out party.

Colin can certainly be a tenacious player at times. I think that if I were having as much trouble manipulating Greg into position for a mooning, I'd have given up on the idea. At least, Colin realized that there was no way he could hold both Greg and Ryan up at the same time. Actually, it was more amusing having the arrogant evil lord fight Braveheart from a sitting position anyway. Finally, points to Sara for being the best at maintaining a straight face through the game. Ryan undied a little during the YOU WILL DIE bits. I didn't see or hear Greg break up, to be fair. But Sara had a lot more opportunities to crack up. (Boom chucka lucka. Boom chucka lucka.) But she didn't. So points to her. Good job, Sara.

Scene to Rap: at the beauty salon
This game was the first time I got a good look at Wayne's pants. Do you think they were originally bought for Colin? Just a tad long there, don't you think Wayne? Scene to Rap is a good game for Greg. It suits his imagination and his verbal skills. "You're going to get all the udder." Ow. Ryan's little verse was nice. Do you think Colin ran out of rhymes or did he double the "And you" line on purpose for effect? I would have liked a different camera shot on Wayne and Ryan after Ryan announced he needed mouth to mouth respiration. From Colin and Greg's expressions, it looked like they were watching Wayne at least begin. And based on Ryan and Wayne's reactions after Drew buzzed in, I guess they wanted to let the game continue. But with that master long shot from the piano, it's hard to tell if Wayne had reached the stage of actually giving "The Kiss of Life" or was simply bending over Ryan. No fair, Mr. Editor. Inquiring minds want to know.

Sit Stand Bend: Ryan = Godfather; Colin = Godfather's violent son; Drew = rival gangster come to make peace with Godfather
Sit Stand Bend and its sister game, Sit Stand Lie, frighten me every time I watch them. Of all the games in the WLiiA canon, those two have the greatest potential for injuring the players, I think. One of these days, someone is either going to miss the stool / bench. Or get kicked in the face. Or get stepped on. I know it; someone is going to get hurt. (The UK version had some close calls. Steve Frost fell off the bench. Ryan stepped on Josie's hair.) This playing came as close as I ever want to see. Colin nearly missed the stool once. And if Ryan hadn't reached out and steadied the stool that second time, Colin would have suddenly ended up sitting on the floor. Hard. Like I said. One of these days.

As usual, Ryan owned this game. (Colin said once that Ryan introduced the game to WLiiA, so it's not surprising that Ryan is so good at it.) He has the presence of mind to suddenly change the positions without warning, moving into an unexpected position as well. For instance, normally the positions rotate through sitting, standing, and bending. But Ryan will move from sit directly to bend bypassing stand throwing off the rotation and forcing everyone else to scramble to a new rotation. Colin usually has trouble with this game, but at least playing a violent son gave him an excuse for his position scrambling. It didn't help Colin that Drew would pick a position and stay in it even when he should have changed. Drew was probably still quite new to the game at that point, though. Not to mention that he kept laughing at Colin who was literally in his face several times. Not the best Sit Stand Bend I've ever seen, but on par with many of them in the past. (Back to the game beginning for one quick comment. Did you notice that Colin was expecting to shake Ryan's hand when Ryan came over? Colin was going for a handshake until he noticed Ryan's arm motions; that's when Colin brought up both arms for the hug.)

Credits: no credits reading
I like having credits readings. But I also like seeing the cast mill around in down time at the end. Is there some way I can have both?

Best Game:
Hmm. I hate to give it to Dead Bodies because that game is essentially a one-player game. And I prefer to award the best game to one that involves multiple players. Based on my multi-player criteria, I ought to give the best game to Let's Make a Date. But, daggonit! Dead Bodies was funnier. So give the statue to everybody's favorite Canadian. (With a little statue for Sara.) And while we're at it, let's make an appointment for Colin with Ryan's chiropractor. I wish Colin's back were better so that we could see this game some more in the future.

Overall Comments:
I haven't seen enough of Season 1 to be the best judge of how this episode compares to the others broadcast during the real first season. But since that's never stopped me before, I'd say that this episode probably wasn't on par with the older ones. There were some nice moments here. Colin's turkey. Greg's Multiple Personalities. Dead Bodies. Ryan's Sit Stand Bend. But this episode will probably go on my second tier list of episodes. Good but not great. And I'm very glad that Drew stopped that looonnnggg show intro for the second and third seasons.

© LKK 12/03/00