Home Bangkok Pattaya River Kwai and Rose Garden A Boy's House Top Man Club Patpong Map Spirits Festivals Amazing Links
Guidebooks inevitably refer to tourists going to Patpong and coming away "disturbed, troubled, bothered." In no way am I trying to minimize the abuses that can take place in these few blocks of the City of Angels where virtually anything sensual that is available can be bought. I merely want to suggest that in some cases, from what I have experienced, something else, something more positive is also going on.
My favorite club is
blocks away from Patpong 1, Patpong 2, and "Soi Twilight." To get there,
one must turn down Thaniya Road and negotiate the clogged street market along
Silom, bobbing and weaving past the stalls and tables of knock off running
shoes, cheap shirts, wrist watches from another planet and other intriguing
items. A sharp left turn at the right moment and you are confronted by what
at first might appear to be a forbidding alley. Neon signs and hustlers from
two or three clubs beckon. Young men lean against the walls in the shadows.
Tentatively, you take a couple of steps, secure in the knowledge that the
brightly lighted street in only feet behind you.
Then you realize something: The alley is covered overhead and almost appears to be air-conditioned. It is cooler than out on the main drag. Everyone seems friendlier now. A hawker tries to verbally pull you into a muscleman club, but the bright sign at the end of the narrow alley beckons. Here, there is no barker, only a stairway leading upwards. Tuneful music, not just raucous disco, can be heard on the second floor. Perhaps one day you will step upwards, as we did.
There are some nice boy & girl bars in Bangkok. Many, if not most, are not the smoke-filled, sleazy places one is led to believe by reading Western press and guidebooks. Top Man, where we ended up however, is Top Drawer. Airy and smokeless, this club offered two-tiered accomodation. The upper row was padded bench-style seating that ran along the back perimeter. Below were two banquette lounges. Both areas were very comfortable. A bar (with real liquor, not just beer) ran alongside the far wall. Boys either congregated here near the dance stage, or in a curved corner of the bench seating.
Something unique was a small altar where one night I saw a young dancer place flowers, perform a wai and pray for several minutes before retiring to a corner to sit quietly by himself. I had never seen an altar in a bar before and I was touched that it was there and overwhelmed that the owners would think of creating such a place of solace for their young (18 - 25 year olds) staff. This was indeed a special place.
We frequented the club nightly and engaged one of the owners, who spoke English, in conversation on several occasions. I learned a lot. Unlike many clubs, the boys received a salary for dancing there. Both through the owner and boys I talked to, I learned about the strictness of certain rules. For one thing, no drugs. For another, safe sex. I was told about the young man who one night was to entertain a lady for the evening. As he was preparing to leave with her, the owner said, "Don't forget the condoms."
"But why?" asked the young man. "It's a woman." The owner explained the facts of life and the rural Thai went on his way a little wiser.
It was clear to me that in this club, the dancers were important as people, as human beings. Most of the boys (as I am sure you readers know) who find their way to Patpong are young men who are fleeing rural poverty. Many are the youngest in large families that are already struggling to make ends meet. In America, or England, or France, or Mexico, or dozens of other countries in the world, these boys would arrive in the primary city, find homes in gangs and become involved in both drugs and violence. Not here, in this club and others, as well. At this club, two boys said over dinner one night, "Do drugs here, and you are gone."
I watched the owner and his relationship with the young men. Many have never had a role model and it was obvious there was one here. Talking with him, I found myself listening to the frustrations of a father figure. It was obvious that he cared for these men as human beings, and I could see it was reciprocated.
Sure, some joints are meat factories, but I witnessed positive attitudes in other bars as well. Several provide sleeping quarters for the young men. In many clubs, I saw laughing, happy workers. Their job was not drudgery, not slave labor thrust upon them. Slaves don't giggle and goof around and maybe not even move out of the prime seats when the manager asks them to. These are boys who feel secure and comfortable--perhaps in the first real home they have ever known.
What I am saying is: Don't approach Patpong through the tight-assed attitudes of much of Western (and, I am basically meaning American) civilization. Remember, you ain't in Kansas anymore, Toto.
To view more on my favorite club in Bangkok, and to see the most up-to-date map on gay clubs, and other Patpong attractions, click on the links below. To read more about the life of bar boys, check out the two excellent articles at Gaybutton's site under "Must See Articles." Another wonderful site dealing with this is Pattayagay.
Home Bangkok Pattaya River Kwai and Rose Garden A Boy's House Top Man Club Patpong Map Spirits Festivals Amazing Links
Copyright Mike Williams, 1999. All rights reserved. Email Mike at sanukthai@hotmail.com
Last updated: November 25, 1999.
