Dahpimpsta.Bagelz.Bigfoot.Me.Myself.I.Bigdeezy.TallBitch.Jew.Balla
Life through the eyes of the tall one they call BigFoot
Look at my tall goofy ass on my WEBCAM.
Past WebJournals: [March 8-11] [March 12-15] [March 16-19] [March 20-23] [March 24-27] [March 28-31]
Past WebJournals: [April 1-4]
4/08/01
Wise words of Deezy, “Smirnoff Ice is good stuff!”
Wise words of Some Angry Guy, “Go to hell Dustin!"
Wise words of my Neighbor, “Keep your dog from shitting on my lawn!“
Today is the one month anniversary of the page being up, I’m pretty proud that I’ve actually written every day, even though some are delayed, but hey my life is busy and I got shit to deal with. I appreciate all my fans who read my journal entries everyday, thank you lots, and for this you get a cookie that will be sent to your home, yet you must pay shipping which is $5.95.
Sunday was a day to rest from the boring weekend indeed, so we gathered a group to play some football. It was a windy cold day, kinda hard to throw bombs, except for the team I was on had some pussies and well, those bombs were made on us. Skor and I being the leaders of the teams, and being the biggest guys out there, gave some big hits. Skor ran through Aram practically knocking the wind out of him, and I ran through Ronquillo like he was a twig with berries. Stevie I would say got the worst of everyone, as thinking he’s athletic cuz he’s black, thought that he could jump over Skor, yet about two, three times jumped right into Skors grasp and made Stevie eat grass. They were some big hits, I got my favorite shirt ripped and had to play with no shirt which was a bitch cuz I’m allergic to grass, so as of now I’m still itching like crazy. MVP honors go to me and Skor, who just about had every touchdown on the day. Pussy of the day goes to my hardcore brother who knows he’s not hardcore as I told him I was gunna pass it too him and he said no, and I said cuz you are too pussy to get hit, and he said so what. Everyone laughed at him, yet once again my brother is a pyrotechnic and ginsu knife collector, so I will chill back.
Went to see the movie Tomcats around 10:00 tonight, a great funny movie indeed. I’m glad I didn’t have to pay, but it’s Regals fault for just having no one there to collect tickets. Favorite part of the movie was when the girl served the guy milk from her breast, titilation of the tittie they call it. Yet again, the asian Quincy let a fart go and captured the laughter of all 20 people in the theater. For an asian, the farts were amazingly loud. Great way too end the night.
The Penis Toes are one month old to the public.
4/07/01
Wise words of Joshua, “I say shit to you!
Wise words of Squincy, “Freeeee Willllyyyyyyyy!"
Wise words of Jono, “Scooooooorrre!!
Formalities of how our American system of regulations is run totally sucks. They say as Americans we are free, yet we have become restricted to only rights written under the constitution. Being restricted means not being free, because “free” means being able to move about without any restraints. We’ve been learning about the Constitution and Civil Rights and what not in our Government class the last month or so, and I’ve realized that our system of civil liberties is bull pucky. On a daily basis most people actually violate the Constitution but there aren’t government officials to do full body cavity searches and arrest us on the spot. There is this new word that has become absorbed into my brain, enumerated rights, that I guess I use to answer every question in Gov. class. Enumerated rights are those extended and assumed rights that we are too have, yet weren’t written by our founding fathers. Another fact is that our founding fathers were high, not on life, but on the green leaf during their writting of many official documents, including the Constitution. Even our own supreme leaders, The Bush as he’s called, has done drugs in his life. You can tell from the way he forgets simple names to the fact that he grins like a freaking idiot. What are we going to do, some things will never change.
For you Jewish people out there, Passover was today, and the usual family collects for a time of retrospect and history called the Sabbath. We read about our liberation, symbolism of differnt foods, and our history. Some songs are even recited, yet my uncle and I have turned the songs into upbeat rap songs, improvising some of our own words. The cedar, reading and eating combined, deals with the drinking of lots of wine, so I guess most of use were toasted the whole night. We then eat the great food cooked by GrandMaMa, and talked about many issues plaguing each other. It was actually a great convo between all of us, because it’s great to see how people differ on issues. Well we were gorged with juicy foods, so we chilled in the living room as I talked with my cousin and uncle. My uncle, Lil Bro, Pops, and I enjoy Fart-Exhibitioning very much. As I said before, it bonds families together and keeps laughter at a high point. My uncle has never experienced the Flamming Sphincter before though....so Zach and I would light it up and pass some gas, Blam Blam Poof!!! It was great, but yet Lil Bro is better then the Bigger Bro, and we couldn’t get Pops to light them, he just let them go instead. It was a great night indeed, Jewish people know how to thrown down and party!!!
Just right now, I decided my Lil Bro is a retarded dork ass, just cuz I said so!!!
After the Sabbath we came home to party, and once again it was a lagging night. We eventually rolled to this party which got shut down as soon as we got there, dumb Royal parties indeed!!! We left and well as usual, people followed us, as we became the leaders of a pack of 15-20 people. Eventually most of them fell behind and we lost them, yet one car, which was driven by Chewbaka and occupied by a couple skeezers, AKA, and Bro#3. These people are nicknamed to hide the stupidity that will follow. So we were driving down Cochran, and eventually they caught up to us and we saw AKA holding a beer out the window like an idiot in Chewbaka’s car. We once again pull ahead and go through a light that turned yellow, yet all of a sudden they are still behind us, meaning they ran the red. We continue to laugh as the next light turned red as we were in the middle of the intersection, with Chewbaka trailing by a good 100 feet, they run another red light. I notice a Po-Po chillin at Texaco next to Taco Bell, and the flashing reds go on, and pull them over. Laughin hysterically were we, as I knew they were to be fucked in the ass royally. Why is that Dustin, well first of all Chewbaka hasn’t had her license for six months making it illegal to drive with anyone under 25, AKA had an open container in the car, and she didn’t have her insurance. It just didn’t sound good, yet luckily the cop let her off on her honesty, as someone died in Simi this mourn for running a red. Chewbaka then let out her gasp, Arghghggghghg, and the night ended.
The Penis Toes were stepped on approximately eight times throughout the night. For you people, watch out where you step, damn idiots!
4/06/01
Wise words of Deezy, “Evil will always triumph cuz good is dumb!"
Wise words of Kellie, “I have a track one!"
Wise words of Kristin, “BC Hockey rules!“
Lil Horn let people know of his parents not being home tonight, so a switch goes off in my brain saying, “Invade, Invade, Invade!” Unexpectectly we showed up around nine o clock with about 20 people. The lights inside suddenly go off, hmmm maybe no one is home we said, yet Horn is an idiot and finally opened the door. While he talked with us, his brother Jeff seemed to be zipping up his pants, and with the latest stories, I just don’t know anymore, hahahah! We finally got in, and they were freaking out, as they constantly met with each other, the Horn’s that is, and I guess made a plan to get rid of us. We finally just left, and Horn could’ve deamed himself a non-hated person by throwin a bitchin party instigated by me Bigdeezy, but he let us all down again...booooooooo!!!
It seems as if there are no more places to chill back and kick it now a days since my house temporarily shut down for reconstruction and relaxation. Where else to kick it but Play It Again Sports...as Simi has been pre-occupied with throwing parties and getting them rolled by po-po’s every two seconds cuz people get outta control. We got our normal group of people and partied at Play It Again late night tonight. It was a night of action packed fun, as lots of sports equipment means lots of craziness. We had some batting practice, played tennis, football, luged, skateboarded, watched CKY2K, and did just about everything. Highlights of the night were me getting angry at Colby and nailing him in the balls with the football, James getting nailed in the balls by Dre with a handball, the tennis ball fight, and me scaring the shit outta everyone. It made up for the crappy night that would’ve been if not for the other Dustin’s brillant idea of a party at Play It Again.
Sidenote #1: Luke is an idiot, and no one even went to Rocky Peak, shows the followers he has, muhahah never follow the English.
Sidenote #2: James has a roid rage temper as he busted my brothers wall by slamming the door into it, and was punked by Zach, therefore giving him the evil devil stare, and actually making me worry, because I wasn’t ready to fight with a linebacker.
The other Dustin and I figured that we have seen the movie CKY2K about 700+ times, give or take 650, and it still hasn’t gotten old. For all you who haven’t yet seen this movie, it is crazy silly fresh hilarious. It’s Bam Margera, Brandon Dicamillo and other people, the ones from Jackass doing there obscene antics all over the world. Very funny I give it two Penis Toes up.
I gotta wake up at the butt-crack of dawn tommorow mourn to go to a damn L.A. Times Banquet for All-Valley player and shit. Although I feel it is an honor, I think it’s gay to wake up at 9 in the mourn, eat soggy eggs, orange juice with extra-extra pulp, and listen to speakers who say the same damn thing. Just my opinion, but who cares otherwise.
Colby ran over the Penis Toes with the luge board, therefore adding to the injuries already sustained to them from previous accidents.
4/05/01
Wise words of Elizabeth, “You hurt my feelers!"
Wise words of Queezy, “Me vale verga!"
Wise words of Dre, “No more locked doors!“
A tad bit nipply out today, and who knew it was going to rain, yet again who thought it was gunna hail? I was out on the tennis courts practicing...tsk tsk and it started to rain a smidge. Me wearing no shirt as usually, started to feel the testicles shrink and retreat into my body, and while I served I felt like a rock hit my back. It was chunky hail, hailing from the dark skies above. I found myself bleeding a tad, from a tiny cut, from a hail stone, in which I now comclude that my skin is weak. I dove under all the bags as the weather dramatically dropped ten degrees, and yet in all the panic, we just quit practice and left. The panic caused the little fellow freshman to be stampeded on, and they perished in the disaster. Hail hurts indeedy-o, and in 1942 a hail storm killed 22 in New York. I could’ve been the first in Simi, ahhhhhhh (two thumbs down + fart sound).
So tommorow at 7 p.m. pacific standard time be at the Rocky Peak Off Ramp for Luke is going to sumptin wierd, which I and everyone else is un aware. Many different theories have arised at the actions that will take place, but yet again we will not know till the time comes, so be there or be square.
Talking about being at the wrong place at the wrong time....the girl soccer players practice and fart around at the extended part of the freshman baseball players outfield. So I guess while they were playing pick up, the girls soccer team that is, some baseball player rocketed a blast into deep center field nailing Andrea in the footsy, causing it to swell up to the size of a swollen foot, whatever that is. Swelling is a sign that your body is weak and can’t handle itself. For Andrea, wear that shit, but nutin but love for yah, even though that is funny shit!
Sidenote: Jenn got her belly button pierced not her clit like the rumor that was going around.
Winning the lotto is just a very rare chance now a day, but I was givin extreme confidence recently as a certain asian family struck it rich on IWON.com. Chin straps family won ten grand on the website, and so everyday I put in my 100 entries hoping to win the cash. I also play different web lottos online for free, in which I’ve won $21.00. I was sent checks for getting numbers right, but I will not be pleased till I win a good ten grand. Trust me, all you out there think I’m a loser for doing this everyday, but in fact I will win and proceed to laugh and say, “No soup for you!!!”
The hail was the size of the Penis Toes, which is a good size, I was petrified!