CERULEAN WIZARD 3: THE CRYSTAL LAKE
Episode 1 – Strike of the Assassins
Scene: The bedroom in Ryane’s apartment
Music: Rui Di Silva feat. Cassandra – “Touch Me”
The bedroom seems quiet and each of the beds are all messed up. But the tranquillity gets interrupted…
(camera turns 180 degrees)
…by a gang of ninjas jumping into the window. Each of them drew out their weapons one by one – a whip, a blob of pink ooze, a shotgun, a samurai sword and a small pistol. They listened carefully and yet the only sound they can hear is the sound of girly singing from the bathroom. Then they looked around the room and eventually they see a golden egg sitting next to the Powers of the Four Seasons. They start going towards the relics and each of them carried one in their hands.
(Music stops)
Just then a rustle was heard. Each of them jumped out of the window together, to find Ryane Platypus and Monnika Muski waiting at the bottom.
[Music changes – Spooks – “Karma Hotel” (Instrumental)]
Ryane: And where do you think you’re going?
(Ninja 1 has a voice like Janet Jackson and the other ninja voices are easily recognisable.)
Ninja 1: Sorry if I interrupted your beauty sleep, but you’re in for a rude awakening!
Ninja 2: You say it girl!
Monnika: I think I can recognise that voice… I’ll call the others!
Ryane: Good idea.
Monnika heads towards a nearby phone booth.
Ryane: (to the ninjas) Drop ‘em.
Ninja 3: Why shall we?
Ninja 4: Who do you think we are? Thievesssssssssss?
Ryane: Yeah Moe!
Ninja 5: Moe? I don’t know what you’re talkin’ about!
Ryane: Pipe it Lio – I can recognise everyone here!
Ninja 2: Fine…
Four of the ninjas removed their masks, revealing themselves as Deksta, Hallie, Lio and Komodo Moe.
Ninja 1: WHAT THE HECK DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOIN?!? TAKE THE POWERS BACK TO BASE – QUICK!!!!!!!!!!
Ryane: Too late!
[Music changes – K Warren and Lee O – “Coming Home” (Instrumental)]
Just then each of them were pinned down by four members of the Crash Team – Dr. Neo Cortex, Snappy Gator, Toby Tortoiseshell and Private Boron each performed their attacks one by one.
Snappy: WANKER!
Ryane: Excellent! Watch it pinky – this girl’s got a ride!
Each of them dragged their opponents to one side, leaving Ryane and the ninja in a karate fight. Back with the others they had an encounter of their own…
Toby: Give us the powers – or else!
Cortex: Toby, you can’t get the powers just like that! Have patience.
Toby: (in the style of Ace Ventura) Aaaaaaaaaaall righty then!!!!!!
But just as when they were going to tie them onto the palm trees the main ninja then drew out her shotgun at Ryane at the other side of the field.
Ryane: (forms a fireball in her hand) Looks like this is gonna be melted down to size…
But just as when she was about to fire, the ninja shot a tranquilliser dart from her shotgun taking down Ryane harshly. Then she turned to the other four and shot them one by one except for Boron, who dodged the attack.
Monnika: (returning from the phone booth) LEAVE HIM ALONE!!!!!!!
But just as when she was about to go any further, the ninja then shot Monnika on the hip, causing her to faint on the floor. Then Boron came up to her growling.
(Music stops)
Ninja 1: Stay back bob… (aims her gun at Boron) Don’t even think about it!
Boron didn’t budge. The ninja didn’t budge either. Then after 5 seconds a gust of wind blew through them. Eventually the ninja drew back her shotgun.
[Music restarts – Cleopatra – “Come And Get Me” (Outro)]
Ninja 1: Look – just go and tell no one that we were ‘ere.
Boron headed towards the other side of the island whimpering.
Ninja 1: (turns to her companions) OK guys, the coast is clear!
Just then each of the villains picked up one Crash Team member each and headed to the mountains with them.
[A fog then appears across the screen and when it fades out the title and opening credits roll alongside a tour of the Northern Hemisphere and Geri Halliwell – “It’s Raining Men”. When the song finishes the scene changes to a top-secret location in Glacier Park. Music restarts - Avalanches – “Since I Left You” (Instrumental)]
The ninja was seen walking gracefully through the icy temple with the golden egg in her hand and headed further up the main corridor. When she reached the end of it she headed through an enormous set of double doors and looked ahead. That was where she saw Tiko Cortex, AKA the Cerulean Wizard, in an armchair of stone.
Tiko: Well well well, if it isn’t new comrade Princess Violet. Thank you for joining me. First things first - how did the mission go?
Violet: It went fine, and I managed to recover the Egg of Courage, like you promised!
Tiko: Thanks! Oh, and you can take your mask off now. No one’s looking.
[Music mixes into Kosheen – “Suicide” (Intro instrumental)]
Violet removed her mask, revealing herself as a pink wolverine with tangerine hair. Then she handed the egg over.
Tiko: Ah, the Egg of Courage…
Violet: I see that you’ve got good ideas for it sir!
Tiko: Yep! This thing is much more powerful than the worthless Key of Virgo, so domination could be upon me! (laughs vilely)
But as he spoke, a brown cat wearing a jetpack was watching him through the window. Just as when he heard the last words, he evacuated the area.
*********************************************
Episode 2 – The Survivor
Scene: Crash’s home
Music: Citizen Kane – “The Journey”
As the scene begins Boron came into the room slamming the door onto the floor and heads straight towards his bedroom, where our hero, Crash Bandicoot, was yet still in bed sound asleep. Upon first sight he started barking like mad to try and warn danger.
Crash: Zzzzzz…
The lack of reaction caused him to growl madly and then just a couple of seconds later he pushed him out of bed and landed with a thud, revealing Crash in red and white striped pyjamas.
(Music stops)
Crash: (tiredly) Ow… Boron, what are you doing here?
Boron barked his message over to Crash.
[Music restarts – Apollo 440 – “Charlie’s Angels 2000” (Intro)]
Crash: I don’t have a clue about what he’s talking about…
Coco: (comes into the room in a pink dressing gown) It seemed like he sensed danger.
(There was a voice that sounded like Eminem.)
Voice: And danger it has been!
Coco: Who was that?
Crash: Let’s hope it’s not your culprit!
The man with the voice stepped into the house from the bedroom window, revealing himself as the brown cat!
Crash: OK, so if you really ARE helpful, do you know what happened?
Cat: The Cerulean Wizard is back, and he’s taken 5 members of the Crash Team, the Powers of the Four Seasons and one of Ryane’s prize relics! (breathes in) There…
Crash: (turns to Coco) Sis, round up everyone in the area!
Coco: Roger!
HALF AN HOUR LATER, IN THE LIVING ROOM
[Music changes – Gorillaz – “Clint Eastwood” (Instrumental)]
A whole host of people were here listening to the cat’s story.
Cat: And then I heard his plan – he’s thinking of using the “Egg of Courage” if that’s what he called it on the Powers to earn more power inside and then… I don’t know the rest from there.
Crash: S’alright kid. Do we yet know who’s not here, as we need to find out which crewmembers are taken!
Teejay: I know that Uncle Neo is not here for start…
Midget: Or my dad!
Coco: And whatever happened to Ryane and Monnika? They’re usually around.
Dingodile: And Toby too – he might have been another.
Cat: Did you say “Toby”?
Dingodile: Yeah…
Cat: As in “Toby Tortoiseshell”?
Crash: What makes you say that?
Cat: I never knew he was alive!
Crash: He’s always been alive! He survived in a car crash 15 years ago and he was the only survivor…
Cat: Not today, as I… am Travis Tortoiseshell, his twin bro!
Crash: And?
Travis: Um… (sings) I’m a survivor, I’m a forgiver, I’m a… (stops singing) erm… forgetter of the rest.
Coco: Welcome to the team Travis! Wonder if you can be a help in tracking down the five members of the Crash Team AND the five relics…
Travis: Surely I love a good mission like that!
Teejay: Now be careful, as Tiko’s a hard nut - believe me!
Travis: Why?
Teejay: Because he’s my dad!
Travis: Oh… and can any of you guys sense a recruit anywhere?
Coco: (types in her desktop) Well I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is that I can be able to locate any friend and enemy on the map!
Crash: Hurrah!
Coco: But the bad news is that we don’t know who we are, as we need to be careful.
Travis: Tell me about the first batch.
Coco: I can sense a friend and a foe in the deserts of West Kansas in the United States. I could also see that he or she is in a stretchy net of some kind.
Travis: And how will we get there?
Crash: How about my bi-plane round the back? It can now fit up to 10 people in it, so we’ll be all right!
Travis: Good on ya!
Coco: I wish you guys the best of luck! Also, we’ll be looking out for you guys as you progress!
Travis: (in the style of Elvis Presley) Why thank you, thankyouverymuch! (winks at Coco)
Coco winked back and then a second later Crash, Travis and Boron headed round the back to the bi-plane, where the hot desert roads of Kansas await them.
****************************************************
Episode 3 – The Assassin Strikes Back
Scene: The desert areas of West Kansas
Music: Sonique – “I Put A Spell On You” (Instrumental)
The bi-plane managed to touch down on the rocky desert roads, but it failed to stop at all.
Travis: QUICK! TRY STOPPING IT!!!!!
Crash: I’m doin’ the best I can…
Boron howled with fright.
(Music stops)
But it was all too late – the plane crashed into a nearby canyon.
[Music restarts – Jennifer Lopez – “Play” (Instrumental)]
Crash and Travis got out with stars spinning around their heads…
Crash: (dizzily) Sorry…
Travis: (dizzily) Don’t panic – at least we’re survivors…
Boron came out like normal and slapped them both across the face.
Crash: Thanks – I could do with that!
Boron: WHOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
[Music changes – Kosheen – “Suicide” (Instrumental)]
Sooner or later, a pink beam started zooming around the area.
Crash: Hang on guys – this could be our danger.
The pink beam managed to touch down on the ground, revealing herself as Violet in her ninja guise.
Travis: (gasps) It’s HER again!
Boron started growling.
Violet: So, you think that you’ll come around this area trying to search for our little prizes? Well don’t even think about spoiling it, buster!
Crash: Yeah, but chances are you’ll need them for a dastardly deed or something.
Violet: What makes you say that?
Travis: I knew you! You were workin’ for the Cerulean Wizard!
Violet: So?
Travis: You just shut yer trap and let me finish – if you’re working wit’ HIM, then you may end up takin’ over the world or something evil like that!
Violet: Sorry, but people like me never reveal secrets. I’m just saying that your puny little friends will never, ever, EVER be seen again!
Crash: False.
Violet: Grrrr… YOU JUST WATCH THE WRATH OF THE CRYSTAL LAKE!!!!!!!!!
Crash, Travis and Boron: (sarcastically) Oooooooooooooh…
Violet: (sighs angrily) Fine. If that’s the way you like it, then you just sit back and let me set off the domination fireworks!
Crash: Chances are that you will never see the light of day after what I do with you!
He shot a missile at her, but just before it struck her she vanished in thin air.
Travis: (sighs) I guess we need to wait that little bit later.
Crash: And for now we NEED to track down that recruit!
Travis: (laughs) This will be too easy!
Boron: YEAH!!!!!!!!
Our heroes start running around the area searching for any hostages…
**********************************************
Episode 4 – Cold As Ice
Scene: The desert areas of West Kansas
Music: Genius Cru – “Boom Selection” (Instrumental)
Our heroes were seen dashing up and around the canyon tracking down their enemies. Crash was climbing a rock face, Travis was on the ground searching for caves and Boron was, well, digging for bones by the looks of it…
Travis: (stops looking) ‘Ey Boron – it’s not lunchtime yet!
Boron howled with hunger.
Travis: (sighs angrily) Look – why didn’t you have a bite before you came here?
Crash: (from the rock face) BECAUSE HE DIDN’T KNOW, ALL RIGHT?
Travis: SOOOOH-REEEEE!!!!! (sighs angrily) I bet we’ll never go anywhere here…
Just then there was a girly scream.
Travis: What was that?
Crash: I heard it from…
Travis: I CAN’T HEAR YOU!!!!!!
Crash: I HEARD IT FROM THE TOP!!!!!!!!!!
Travis: (gets alert) Hopefully that should be our target. C’mon BoBo – let’s go!
Boron smiled at him and then followed him.
AT THE TOP OF THE ROCK
[Music changes – Sisqo – “Thong Song” (Instrumental)]
Our heroes managed to climb onto the top one by one…
Crash: (pants madly) What a climb…
Travis: (puffs) Yeah… I never experienced THAT much a cliffhanger in my life!
Voice: Speaking of cliffhangers, how about you try and get me down?
Boron managed to climb up wheezing madly and we saw Monnika Muski in a net suspended on a very tall cactus trying to break out.
Crash: Hey Monique – how’s it goin’?
Monnika: I DON’T HAVE TIME FOR QUESTIONS – JUST TRY AND GET ME DOWN!!!!!!!!!!!!
Travis: Sheesh…
Crash: Have you tried any attacks to break the net?
Monnika: I tried everything, yet it just won’t break!
Crash: OK, so we need to try something here… (turns to Boron) Could you please pull the net down?
Boron dashed towards the net.
Crash: And Monnika, could you hang on to the top part of the net while we try and get you down?
Monnika climbed up to the top of the net and Boron jumped up high in order to pull the net down. Then he rubbed it back and forth among the cactus and eventually it cut the net open, dropping her down onto the ground.
Monnika: Thanks a lot guys! I could do with a bit of help right now!
Travis: And now that you’re free, I want to know who managed to lock you up.
Monnika: Don’t you know yet? (kicks Travis, sending him hanging on the rock face)
Crash: And we’re glad to see you here! By the way, do you have a clue about who took you here?
Monnika: I managed to recognise her as Hallie. Too bad she’ll be too easy to beat when I get a power off her!
Crash: Exactly! I can remember what happened last time around!
Monnika: (smiles back) Wonder what surprises she has in store this time around…
(Music stops)
Suddenly there were some footsteps from behind them.
Crash: Looks like we’re about to find out!
******************************************
Episode 5 – Love At Third Fight
Scene: At the top of the canyon
Music: Cortina – “Music Is Moving” (Instrumental)
The shadow came closer to them. After 5 steps our crew turned around and saw the spy. Then she came out and revealed herself as Violet. This caused three crewmembers to turn towards Crash angrily.
Crash: But everyone makes mistakes…
Monnika: Who is she?
Travis: Some wild ninja gal codenamed the Crystal Lake.
Monnika: The crystal what?
Violet: So, we meet again, Crash Bandicoot, for the very last time…
Crash: What makes you say that, bub?
Boron started growling.
Violet: You haven’t seen what I can do! (draws out a sceptre with a pink crystal on it) Just take the culprit you have and scram, or else…
Travis: Or else what, pinky?
Violet: Or else you’ll never see your other friends and your precious relics ever again!
Boron continued growling.
Monnika: Take it easy – this girl means business.
Violet: So what are you gonna turn down – your friends or your lives?
Travis: NEITHER!!!!!!!!
(Music changes – Mario Piu feat. DJ Arabesque – “The Vision”)
Travis tried a counterattack right at Violet, but she dodged the attack. Then he looked around and saw the cactus that Boron freed Monnika with. He then wrapped his hands in the elastic from the net and tore out one of the hooks from it.
Crash: I think that’s a bad idea…
Travis: I think it IS! Now stand back and let’s show you how it’s done!
He then swung the hook right at her and as it made contact on her mask they both squealed. Travis collapsed on the floor with cactus needles stuck through the elastic “mittens” and Violet also headed onto the floor back first with her mask torn off!
Crash: Trav, are you all right?
Travis couldn’t help but moan with pain.
Crash: It’s all right – I’ll help you out. (drags Travis out of the way)
[Music changes – Darude – “Feel The Beat” (slow bit)]
This left Boron and Monnika on the battle area. Monnika looked more serious at Violet, now showing herself as a pink wolverine, and Boron seemed like he was in a trance.
Violet: (aims her sceptre at her targets) Looks like we have a lot of business to get through…
Monnika: Boron, you try something to get her down!
There was no response.
Monnika: Boron?
Boron had love hearts in his eyes and his tongue hanging out. Then he started walking towards Violet like he was deeply in love.
Monnika: (sighs angrily) This isn’t good… I’M GOING IN!!!!!!
(Music stops)
She fires an ice beam at Violet’s feet, causing her to be chased off screaming.
Monnika: (giggles) There she goes! And it looks like we’ve been in for one heck of a whamming, eh Boron?
Boron still had love hearts in his eyes and his tongue sticking out.
Monnika: (rushes up to Boron and slaps him) SNAP OUT OF IT!!!!!!
Boron sooner enough got alert and turned back to Monnika.
Crash: Don’t feel so mad at him – I think I know what’s happened, as I’ve been through this before.
Monnika: What is it?
Crash: He’s… in love…
**********************************************
Episode 6 – An Apology, And A New Strategy
Scene: The top-secret temple in Glacier Park
Music: Dream – “He Loves U Not” (Middle 8 instrumental)
Violet was seen in front of her master with a worried expression across her face.
Tiko: What the heck did you do?
Violet: OK, so I let one of the hostages go and I had my mask taken off.
Tiko: WHY????????
Violet: It was an accident…
Tiko: I’ll show you accident when I’m through with you…
Violet: Cool it, chill. At least we can be able to catch that vixen back.
Tiko: Good point.
[Music changes – Rachel McFarlene – “Lover” (Instrumental)]
One of the radars across the room started beeping.
Tiko: Let me see… (walks towards it)
Violet: Let me guess – another problem from that blasted bandicoot and his chums.
Tiko: It says here that they’re just a few yards away from the first power! I just can’t believe how they can track it down…
Violet: No matter what they’re not taking it!
Tiko: (sighs) Looks like I am left to one alternative… (picks up his mobile phone and dials in a number)
Violet whistled along to “Independent Woman part 1” by Destiny’s Child as Tiko dialled in the number. Sooner enough, his phone started ringing, with his ring tone being “Stan” by Eminem.
Violet: Like, how musical are we going to get here?
Tiko: I don’t have a blinkin’ clue.
Hallie: (on the phone) Hello?
Tiko: Hallie, we have a dangerous situation where you are now.
Hallie: (on the phone) What now?
Tiko: Crash has just released one of the hostages and is now heading towards your cave!
Hallie: (on the phone) Whom have they released?
Tiko: Monnika has been set free.
Hallie: (on the phone) Oh no… I’m not going through THAT again!
Tiko: Well if you want to be more powerful just enclose your power inside you!
Hallie: (on the phone) But it’s like fighting fire with fire…
Tiko: JUST DO IT, WOMAN!!!!!!!!!
Hallie: (on the phone) But… (sighs angrily and turned her phone off)
Tiko: (sighs angrily and looks down) Girls…
Violet: That’s OK – I’ll meet them over at Greece if they want to come cryin’ to me for a decent enough fight to take their prizes.
Tiko: Thanks!
Violet: Any time.
Tiko: Sooner enough, them critters are going to see no mercy… (laughs vilely)
**********************************
Episode 7 – Pitch White
Scene: Outside a cave in a canyon in the desert areas of West Kansas
Music: Aaliyah – “Try Again” (Instrumental)
Our heroes were seen outside the cave discussing the recent incident…
Travis: What do you mean ol’ Bobo here has fallen in love?
Crash: Don’t you know yet?
Travis: No – I ain’t had a chick all my life!
Crash: OK…
Monnika: Maybe it’s all down to the looks of the opposite sex. When you look at a male, it’s usually the muscles or the looks that appeals to them.
Crash: What about a girl?
Monnika: It’s down to the jiggly bits, skippy.
Crash and Travis looked at each other blankly while Boron still had love hearts in his eyes and staring at nothing in particular.
Travis: This is going to seem pretty tricky… I need to figure out how to tear him away from her…
Crash: Why? He seems perfect for her!
Travis: Because he may work for Tiko when she next comes around and tries to bring him down to size.
Monnika: I’ll try and think about it later. For now, I can detect the Power of Winter in here.
Travis: How come?
Monnika: I can feel a cold rush from here. Who’s going in?
Crash: Aye myte! What about back-up in case it goes wrong?
Monnika: If you’re against any girls I’ll be ready for them!
Travis: Boron and I will be ready for the blokes!
Boron: (dizzily and in love) WHOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
Crash: Wish me luck! (walks into the cave)
IN THE CAVE
[Music changes – Orbital – “Funny Brake” (Chorus)]
Crash walked through the dark damps of the cave keeping track of any light he saw along the way. Sooner enough, he came down to a widened out dead end.
(Vocals stop)
Crash: Did I make a wrong turn anywhere?
(Music stops)
Voice: Of course not – you’re gonna face a bad wrath!
[Music changes – Fragma – “You Are Alive” (Instrumental)]
Crash turned away from the dead end and saw the torches light up the tunnel. Then a dark shadow came towards him and immediately dashed towards him, pinning him down to the floor.
Crash: I bet you can’t do better that that!
The person with the voice had a torch shining down on her, revealing herself as Hallie.
Crash: So… what are thinkin’ of doin’ this time?
Hallie: Leave your prizes behind and leave… or else! (forms a white ball in her hand)
Crash: Impossible…
She shot the ball at him, striking him down frozen solid from the waist down. He struggled to get up and was then cornered, with her whip out. She took aim and made her strike…
*********************************
Episode 8 – Electric Avenue
Scene: The dark caves in a canyon in the desert areas of West Kansas
Music: Hi-Gate – “Gotta Work It Out”
Crash was currently cornered by Hallie, in a situation when both of his legs are frozen solid and he was going to be given a severe whipping.
Hallie: Say your prayers, rat!
She then struck her whip down and ended up having it tightly wrapped around his neck, causing him struggling to breathe. Eventually, he sent out a squeal and passed out.
Hallie: (laughs vilely) Your days are numbered!
She rushes up to him and seals both his mouth and nose with her hands.
(Music changes – Storm – “Storm”)
But before she even knew it an ice beam was seen flying towards the dead end and nearly struck her down.
Hallie: Grrr… WHOEVER YOU ARE, SHOW YOURSELF!!!!!!
A female shadow came running towards her, followed by an animal on all fours and a cat creature. Another beam was shot and she once again missed Hallie by the skin of the teeth. The team then came out of the darkness as Monnika, Boron and Travis!
Hallie: What do you think you’re doing here, ice princess?
Monnika: I’m here to show you a lesson in manners, bub!
Hallie: Prove it. (draws out her whip)
Monnika: Guys, you try and bring Crash to one side and revive him. The girl is mine!
She started rushing up towards her and fired a powerful ice beam from the palms of her hands right onto her target… but she backfired and shot it back at her, sending her to the ground also with both legs frozen!
Monnika: (worried) Oh boy…
Hallie did nearly the same thing as she did to Crash – knocked her out with her whip but as she was about to suffocate her Boron bit her on her behind, causing her to scream. Then he rushed up to Monnika and started barking at her. Sooner enough, she began to revive herself.
Monnika: This girl… her unknown strength…
Boron started patting her on the head.
Monnika: Thanks, but it may not be good enough to last.
Boron started whimpering and hugged her on her frozen legs. Meanwhile, back with Travis, he had problems trying to revive Crash…
Travis: (shakes him) PLEASE GET BACK UP!!!!!!!
There was no response. He then placed his hands to his wrist tightly.
Travis: Only a slight pulse… O… K…
Hallie: What do you mean OK, buster?
Travis: YOU TRIED TO KILL HIM OFF, DIDN’T YOU???????
Hallie: Um…
Travis: Then you should face THIS!!!!!
He fired an electric beam right at Hallie, but just before it was about to strike her an ice beam froze her solid.
(Music stops)
Travis: Huh? Who was that?!?
[Music restarts – Lonestar – “Amazed” (instrumental)]
He turns to his left and he saw Monnika up and running again, with both legs defrosted.
Travis: Way to go… how did you do that?
Monnika: It’s all down to the heat. (pats Boron)
Boron smiled back at her.
Travis: But… whoa… I liked yer jazz! By the way, does electricity react well with ice?
Monnika: Maybe with water, but not ice.
Travis: YEAH!!!! Well… at least I didn’t help her. Also, I’ve ended up leaving Crash in a coma.
Monnika: Don’t panic – I have it all undercover.
She takes a torch off the walls and shone it deep on Crash’s legs, and then on his heart.
Monnika: I hope he feels better…
Sooner enough, he started to revive himself pretty quickly. He sat up and looked at the crew.
Crash: (wipes his forehead) I feel like I’m in a hot flush… and wait a mo – what happened to Hallie?
Monnika smiled at him.
Crash: Ah, I see! Mind you, she tackled me too differently!
Monnika: In what way did she do so?
Crash: She started firing ice beams and the lot at me! She’s totally freaked me out!
Monnika: Not today!
Sooner enough, the Power of Winter escaped from Hallie and seeped into Monnika’s heart.
Monnika: I can feel the chills!
Travis: And that whip lass can feel a sad wrath!
Monnika: (giggles) Too bad I won’t be seeing her for a while!
Just then a hologram came into the room. It was of Coco!
Crash: Hey there sis – How’s it going?
Coco: Congratulations in obtaining the first relic and the first hostage!
Crash and Travis: THANK YOU!!!!!!!
Coco: Now listen – I want you to come back over here immediately within the next 5 hours. If you don’t make it then I could try and contact you by a hologram again… or anyone else could.
Monnika: What’s the purpose?
Coco: I need to tell you guys about the next mission. I have nearly tracked down the next set of prizes but I don’t have enough details to tell you where they are.
Crash: That’s all right. We can do with a break!
Coco: Good luck! (vanishes)
Travis: You know what she said – we’re outta here for the time being!
Our heroes then headed out of the dark caves for the next venture on their path…
TO BE CONTINUED
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OUT-TAKES OF THE SAGA
Ryane: (forms a fireball in her hand) Looks like this is gonna be melted down to size…
But just as when she was about to fire, Violet was about to fire her gun, but it exploded from the rear end, giving her a sooty face at the end of the explosion.
Ryane: (cracks up) You’re no worse than Dingodile with his go-kart, eh?
Dingodile: (from backstage) I HEARD THAT!!!!!!
********************************
Crash: He’s always been alive! He survived in a car crash 15 years ago and he was the only survivor…
Travis: Not today, as I… am Travis Tortoiseshell, his twin bro!
Crash: And?
Travis: Um… (sings) That thong-thong-thong-thong-thong!
Everyone starts laughing.
Crash: (giggles) What was that for?
Travis: Check out Coco’s gear!
Coco was then seen in a pink bikini.
Coco: (blushes anime-style) I think I picked up the wrong costume…
********************************
Crash: Hang on guys – this could be our danger.
The pink beam managed to touch down on the ground, revealing himself as Snappy in Violet’s costume.
Snappy: (looks down at the costume) Does my bum look big in this?
Everyone on the set started laughing. But just then Violet in a sorceress costume came in and gave Snappy a Stone Cold Stunner.
Violet: THAT’S FOR TAKING MY COSTUME!!!!!!!
********************************
Monnika climbed up to the top of the net and Boron jumped up high in order to pull the net down. Then he rubbed it back and forth among the cactus, but sooner enough, he let go of it with a squeal.
Crash: What’s the matter?
Boron came crying to Crash, hugging him tightly.
Crash: OW!!!
Travis: Don’t worry – he may seem too cuddly.
Crash: It’s not that – it’s them cactus needles on his paw!
Travis: Say what?
********************************
Monnika: (giggles) There she goes! And it looks like we’ve been in for one heck of a whamming, eh Boron?
Boron still had love hearts in his eyes and his tongue sticking out.
Monnika: (rushes up to Boron and slaps him) SNAP OUT OF IT!!!!!!
The slap caused Boron to head for the ground in an unconscious state.
Director: CUT!!!! Monnika, you slapped him too hard!
Monnika: What, a slight tap on the cheek? I don’t think so…
*******************************
Violet whistled along to “Independent Woman part 1” by Destiny’s Child as Tiko dialled in the number. Sooner enough, his phone started ringing, with his ring tone being, oddly enough, “Baby One More Time” by Britney Spears.
Violet: You’ve got the wrong ring-tone, you pillock!
Tiko: Sorry…
*******************************
Monnika: Maybe it’s all down to the looks of the opposite sex. When you look at a male, it’s usually the muscles or the looks that appeals to them.
Crash: What about a girl?
Monnika: It’s down to the jiggly bits, skippy… (cracks up)
Crash: What?
Monnika: It’s too funny… (laughs loudly)
Crash: Maybe for girls but not for us…
*******************************
Coco: Congratulations in obtaining the first relic and the first hostage!
Crash and Travis: THANK YOU!!!!!!!
Coco: Now listen – I want you to come back over here immediately… (vanishes)
Crash: Wait a minute – this wasn’t supposed to happen until later!
Director: Sorry – we’re out of battery power with the hologram service at the moment.
Travis: O… K…
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