Crow: Don't you run that crappy web-site?
Kato: It's not crappy...It's campy.
The opening animation starts, accompanied by the theme music.
Theme Song: In your dreams, magical thoughts
Kato: ...of Spam
Theme Song: All things are real unless you dream they're not
Crow: That makes sense
In your dreams, love is the plot, carried on wings of hope. Each of our souls intertwine when we do
Kato: Hey, that's dirty.
Instantly we see it, the time to grow and be it, when everything is pinned on a hope
Servo: Huh? What is "it"?
The the song continues with more nonsense lyrics
Crow: (Sings) The neverending story...
The title screen appears. Three options appear: New Game, Load Game, and...Options.
Servo: Options? Is there an option that lets us skip the first disk? I want to make this quick.
Kato: (selects New Game) No, that's just perposterous.
Crow: That's a big word for you.
Kato: Perposterous?
Crow: No, that's.
The game begins with the hero (Alex) in front of Dyne's monument near the city of Burg. Alex talks about how much he admires Dyne.
Servo: Oh no, he's not obsessed.
Alex goes on about how he wants to have adventure.
Crow: He considers going toliet papering adventure.
Alex finishes his big speech. A high-pitched voice is heard calling him.
Crow: Is that his mother?
Kato: (like a Japanese mother) Arekusu, gohan!
Servo: (woman's voice) Alex, honey, grandma's here.
Nall, a flying cat like thing, flys up to Alex
Nall: There you are Alex. I've been looking all over for you.
Servo: 'cause it's time to die.
Nall reveals that Alex forgot to go practice his song with Luna, and Luna's going to be upset that you're late.
Kato: I hope they're not practicing the theme song.
Alex and Nall begin to leave, but there is an earthquake. The third one in a week, as Nall points out.
Crow: So, Burg is like any other Japanese city.
After the quake, the rotund Ramus enters
Kato: So that's what caused the earthquake.
Ramus: Now that the warm weather has melted the ice near the dragon's cave, there isn't any time to waste getting started on our big adventure!
Crow: Toilet papering!
Ramus: ...and get a fantastacly huge diamond worth thousands and thounsands of silver!
Servo: In pennies.
Alex agrees to go with Ramus.
Crow: (as Alex) I have to be back by 4. I don't wanna miss Gundam Wing.
Ramus heads back to Burg to stock up on supplies
Kato: He's got to make sure there's enough Hostess cup cakes for him.
Alex and Nall go to the Burg Springs to meet Luna. Luna is in the middle of singing her "la la" song. She doesn't notice Alex and Nall.
Luna: La la la la la
Servo: Da da da
Kato: Nah nah nah
Crow: Dooby dooby doo
Alex begins to play his orcana along with her signing.
Servo: Ya think he'll play Stairway to Heaven
Kato: Probably
Luna chuckles at Alex. She turns around to meet him. She guesses that he was late because he was either at Dyne's Monument, or planning an adventure with Ramus. Nall reveals that it was both.
Crow: (as Alex) No, Nall! Ixnay!
Nall then goes on to tell that Alex and Ramus want to go to the dragon's cave. Luna asks Alex not to go to the cave because it's dangerous.
Crow: There might be dragons there!
Servo: Or Al Gore.
Kato: Or President Bush.
All: Dragons, and Gore, and Bush! Oh my!
Luna pouts and then decides to go with Alex. She recommends that you search for stuff they might be able to use.
Kato: All they find is an egg beater.
Crow: If Alex is supposed to be the hero, why didn't he think of searching the house?
Kato: Don't think about such things!
They go back to the house, and ask Alex's dad if they can check the chests in the basement for stuff.
Servo: (as Alex) Dad, I'm goin' on an adventure that could get me killed. Can I borrow the car?
Alex's dad gives them the okay, and a knife for Alex, and a sling for Luna, and a flame ring.
Crow: Alex's dad just has these things lying around the house?
Kato: Just don't think about it.
Alex and Luna raid the chests in the basement.
Crow: Hey! Dad's Playboy stash!
Having finished finding goodies, Alex, Luna, and Nall go to see if Ramus is ready.
Crow: Is Luna in love with Alex?
Kato: I believe so.
Crow: But isn't she his sister?
Kato: No.
Crow: But they live at the same house.
Kato: What have I told you about thinking?!
after meeting up with Ramus, they go to the dragons cave. They fight their way to a special room. The accidently wake up Quark, the white dragon.
Quark: Who has disturbed my slumber?
Kato: You're not Jehova's Witnesses are you?
Quark realizes that their only kids.
Servo: So he's not going to eat them? Darn.
Ramus reveals that they want the dragon diamond.
Quark: Why must you humans value such things? don't you know they're made from my sh....
All: Ewwwww!
Kato: And Ramus still wants it!
Quark tells Luna she looks familiar
Crow: Don't we play bridge together?
Quark wants them to retrive the dragon's ring before he'll give them the diamond.
Servo: And sweep my floors, and wash my car...Don't forget, two coats of wax.
They find the ring, and take it back to Quark. Quark gives Ramus the diamond. He lets Alex keep the ring.
Servo: Keep it as a symbol of our love
Quark tells Alex to go to the mainland, seek out the other 3 dragons, and become a man.
Kato: (as Alex) But Quark, I'm 23!
Alex, Luna, Ramus, and Nall return to Burg
Crow: (laughing) Become a man! What was Quark thinking?
Servo, Crow, and Kato take a break from gaming.
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