Fools Motley Magazine

The rumble of hoofbeats dragged him from a sound sleep. Grendel leaned out of the little shack that stood at the end of the bridge and eyed the oncoming horseman. The man was arrayed in full plate mail, glittering clean and new, with a lance at the ready across the horse's shoulder. The animal was heavily armored in bright barding that covered its head, flanks, and haunches.

"Great," Grendel grumbled sourly.

He stepped outside and stretched, the joints in his
huge arms popping loudly, then raised a three-
fingered, black-taloned paw. The knight reined his
mount to a halt. Grendel looked behind the horseman
for any others, but they were alone.

"You want to pass, you pay the toll. One silver
piece," he intoned for the umpteenth time that month.

A baritone voice boomed clearly from the knight's
armor. "You will receive no tribute from me, O
Unholy Beast," it announced.

Grendel winced. He hated it when they resorted to
name calling. Even trolls deserved some respect,
didn't they? "No pay, no pass," he barked back.

"The only thing I have for you is my steel!"

Grendel made a wry face at the man. He really didn't
feel like going through this today. He'd had a
toothache all week, and first thing this morning he'd
clunked his head on the tollbooth door. Besides, he'd
already fought three knights this month. He still
had a sore foot from where one of their horses had
trodden it.

Whatever happened to the good old days, when humans
would include a sacrifice with the bridge when they
built it? Sure it was grisly, cementing up the body
in the foundation, but it showed the proper respect
for the Powers. Now they just put the things up
wherever they felt like, without the proper ceremony.
There was just no respect for the old ways any more.
You had to stand on them just to remind them who the
real owner of the river was.

The knight was girding himself for battle, but
Grendel's head was throbbing and his foot hurt.
He hadn't finished his nap and felt generally
disgusted with the whole situation.

"You know what??he told the knight. I'm sick of
this whole 'No pay, no pass' thing. I'm out here every
day, in the hot sun, the rain, and the freezing cold,
busting my tail." He shook a heavy finger at the
man. "You humans have run off all the game, so I have
to schlepp toll at this bridge to buy food. And I
can't go into town because people panic at the sight
of me."

"Well they should," the knight countered, unimpressed
by Grendel's grousing. "Thou art truly an
abomination, monster!"

"I'm a monster?" Grendel sputtered. "I'm a monster?
What about the farmer I have to buy meat from? He
knows I can't go anywhere else, so do you know what he
charges me for a side of beef? Five silver coins.
Five! How's that for a monster?"

The knight's lance point lowered a little. "That does
seem rather steep."

"Damn right it is," Grendel said. "And the only
source of income I have is this bridge. I charge one
silver coin to cross, only one. I'm lucky to pull
three silver a week."

"The toll is too great!" the knight blurted.

"Why? Who needs to cross this bridge, anyway? I'll
tell you who," Grendel went on before the knight could
answer. "Merchants and soldiers, lords and ladies,
that's who."

"Farmers, too," the knight put in.

Grendel snorted. "Farmers? What's on the other side
of this bridge a farmer can't find on this side?
Nothing." He leaned toward the knight. "My friend,
somebody's been playing you for a fool."

"I beg your pardon."

"Who told you about this bridge?"

The knight straightened in his saddle. "My Lord
Edward Delany, Duke of Endalia, Protector of the
Realm."

"I thought so. He told you I was a man-eating monster
who terrorized the countryside and ambushed innocents
on the bridge, didn't he?"

"Well, yes."

Grendel shook his head sadly. "Don't you see? Your
duke wants this bridge to be free so he can save a
couple of silver a month. Cheap bastard."

"But, the innocents ---"

"Did I ambush you? Did I lay in wait under the bridge
and jump you from behind?"
The knight's steed shifted its weight while the man
considered this.

"Look," Grendel went on, I'm just trying to get by.
But you know, it's not worth the aggravation anymore.
All right." He stepped out of the knight's
path. "You win. I yield. Go on across. Find out for
yourself what's over there that the innocents might
want. Who cares? What difference does it make? I'm
going back in to finish my nap."

The knight, nonplussed, watched as the troll stomped
back into the tollbooth. After a moment's hesitation,
he spurred his mount slowly forward, keeping a wary
eye on Grendel through the booth's windows. The troll
waved his hand in dismissal at the knight and leaned
back against the wall, closing his eyes.

In a little while, Grendel heard the clatter of the
horse's hooves on the bridge. He opened one eye and
looked out the back window of the booth to see the
knight nearing the middle of the span.

He reached into a dark corner of the booth and pulled
a lever. The trapdoor worked perfectly, sending
knight and steed plunging into the river. He watched
in satisfaction as they sank below the surface.

"It might not be sporting," he told the Power of the
river, "But it's effective."

He pushed the lever back and the trapdoor closed.
Rubbing the bump on his head, he settled back to
finish his nap.

END

Published by Fools Motley Magazine, 2003. All rights are property of the author. Copying and distribution of this work is prohibited. Webpage designed by Fools Motley Magazine based on templates from www.angelfire.com . Background provided by www.coolarchive.com . Image provided by www.angelfire.com .