Enter Fatman
by John

Last Sunday, Sidney Ponson pitched lights-out ball against the Red Sox. Whenever he got in trouble, he got the crucial out to hold the Red Sox to one earned run through 5 and 2/3rds innings. He solidified him as the ace of the staff (well, the ace of the starters. We all know Julio is the TRUE ace).

However, Sir Fatass - Er, Sidney's theme music is "Enter Sandman" by Metallica. Now, we here at Jorge Julio is God decided to write him a new set of music set to the tune of "Enter Sandman" that more accurately relects the gravity of Sidney Ponson.

All rumors that Sidney "bulked up" while in San Francisco are false. That's 100% naturally acquired gut.

Enter Fatman

Eat your dinner little one
don’t forget, my son
that you weigh a ton

Suck it down, an entire pound
of that butter we found
till the Fatman he comes

Eat with some pie flowing
munching your chow all night

Exit thin
enter skin
take my ham
off to sweets and chocolate land

Shut the fridge, something’s wrong
smell of food is strong
really tasty egg foo yong

Deams of pork, dreams of pies
dreams of large French fries
and other things to super size

Eat with some pie flowing
munching your chow all night

Exit thin
enter skin
take my ham
off to sweets and chocolate land

Now I sit me down to eat
pray the baker my cake is sweet
If I diet to lose weight
pray to lower my heart rate

Hush little fatty, don’t say a word
and don’t you eat that turkey bird
You're hiding sweets under your bed
in your closet, you're well fed

Exit thin
enter skin
rack of lamb

Exit thin
enter skin
take my ham
off to sweets and chocolate land

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