The tune on the radio caught her attention when she entered the room and the first verse alone caused the tears to begin to fall. Sure, he was still here with her, but he couldn’t have been further away if he were on another planet. She looked at the fire dancing in the fireplace and could hear the wind blow. Fighting a sigh and wrapping her arms around herself, she looked back over at Luis. He was crying. Between his tears and the tender song playing, she felt her own tears start to swell in her eyes and began a silent decent down her cheeks.

Not a word was exchanged as the two just stared into each other’s eyes from across the room. Their breathing was quick and shallow, anticipation of what would happen causing this erratic pattern. The tension was so thick it could have been cut with a knife. Yet neither chose to speak.

“Sad song,” she motioned to the alarm clock.

“Yea,” he nodded, wiping his cheeks to make sure that the tears were gone. “Theresa has that CD and Mama plays it all the time. That’s her song for Papa and Antonio,” he cleared his throat. “Would you like something to eat?”

“No, thank you.”

He nodded.

“You were crying,” she stated the obvious.

“So were you.”

“I always cry,” she attempted to joke. “Tell me.”

“You know I think I’m gonna go make some breakfast…” he started to walk towards the kitchen but she grabbed his arm.

“You said we were going to remain a couple, Luis. Why are you pushing me away?”

He looked deep into her blue eyes and sighed. “I didn’t want to, Sheridan. I just can’t help it. I…I’m going to go make breakfast,” he went into the kitchen.

She just stood there, watching the doorway he had walked into as if he would turn around. He was closing up on her. After all they had been through he was closing up on her again. “I’m not letting him do that,” she stamped off after him. “Luis, I think we need to…” she faded off as she spotted him at the table. His head was in his arms and he was crying again.

Placing a tentative hand on his back, Sheridan decided that she needed to get this to stop and quickly. When he didn’t push her hand off, she began to rub small soothing circles on his back. “Please, don’t cry, Luis.”

He didn’t look up, just continued to let his feelings out.

“I do love you, Luis,” she tried again.

Still nothing.

“Damn it, Luis, you’re not making this easy on either of us!”

“It isn’t supposed to be easy!” he yelled, finally shoving her hand off of his back. “It isn’t supposed to suit you either! I’ve got to get out of here…Crane security will watch you so you can go up to the mansion and be with them. I’ll be back at four to bring you over to Mama’s…if you still want to go.”

“Of course I still want to go.”

“Then I’ll be back at four,” he went into the living room to change and after a few minutes she heard the front door close and she was alone.

“It’s amazing how quiet this place is without Luis,” she sniffled and went into her room to change. Within a half hour, she had four gifts in her arms and was heading for the mansion.

Luis didn’t know where he was going, but he knew it was going to be as far away from the cottage as he could be without ignoring his job. He was surprised to find the car stopped at the Book Café, which was closed for the holiday. Climbing out of the car, he was about to head to the Youth Center and shoot some hoops when he saw Beth inside checking on her shop, wearing a fluffy white cotton robe. Knocking on the glass, he waved and motioned that he would like to come in.

Beth knew this could be trouble and reminded herself that Luis was only a friend now. Beth acknowledged the love he held for Sheridan, even if he was going to refuse it. Not that it mattered, she thought dreamily; she was falling for Hank. How ironic that the one person she had overlooked for the last ten years was the man she was destined to be with. Walking to the door, she unlocked it and allowed Luis to come inside from the cold.

“What are you doing in town, Luis, especially at this hour?”

“Avoiding the situation at the cottage,” he admitted, slinking down into a nearby chair.

“Come on upstairs, I have a fresh pot of coffee and I can make you something to eat.”

“Thanks, Beth, but what I really need is someone to talk to.”

“Hey, I can cook and talk at the same time, Luis Lopez-Fitzgerald,” Beth winked. “If you remember right, there is very little I can’t do while talking.”

He laughed nervously. “Very true.”

“Now come on, I’ll put some real clothes on and then cook something for Harmony’s own super hero. Then you can help me fill in the gaps from last night and we can get you out of this mood.”

“What mood?” he asked seriously.

“That ‘oh help me I am a heartbroken fool’ mood,” she teased him again and headed upstairs. Luis followed, though not closely, and went straight into the living room so Beth could have time to change. He went to the window and looked out at the snow-covered ground. Had it really been just over a week since he brought Sheridan here for the tree lighting? Had they been standing at this window when Luis realized proposing might be futile? Sighing, he decided that living in the memory would continue to depress him. He walked over to the flowered couch and sank down into it, waiting for Beth.

Sheridan entered the main house reluctantly. Julian was bound to know that she and Luis were a couple; were a couple? Past tense? She wasn’t sure where they stood at the moment. Sighing, she pushed the door open wider and noticed that there was bantering going on in the parlor. “Ivy and Julian,” she shook her head.

“Aunt Sheridan! Merry Christmas.” Ethan swept down the stairs with Theresa at his heels. “I expected you to be sharing breakfast with Luis…”

“Merry Christmas to you too,” the smile she tried to force faded. “He left early this morning.”

“Left?” Ethan was getting angry. “He’s the bodyguard.”

“He left me with Crane security while he ran home for some clothing, Ethan, let it go,” she was lying. She had no idea where Luis was.

“Fine, fine,” he waved his hands in defeat. “If you insist.”

“I do.”

“Did you work it out?” Theresa asked Sheridan.

“Well, we worked out our disagreement over you and Ethan, but this morning he was back to pushing me away when it came to our feelings for each other, if that’s what you mean.”

“Sheridan, my brother is a fool, but he will come to his senses. Luis loves you with all his heart.”

“And I love him with all of mine, but it won’t solve our problem if he won’t talk to me,” Sheridan sighed. “Anyway, I brought over the gifts I had an elf buy for Christmas,” she winked at Theresa. “Theresa, yours is still at the cottage, I’ll bring it buy tonight.”

“Sister, dear, I didn’t expect to see you so early…or so…alone,” Julian’s voice droned into the conversation.

Sheridan spun slowly. “Good morning and Merry Christmas to you too, Julian.”

“No need to be such a grump, dear sister. Where is your…bodyguard?” He said the final word with a very understood subtext. Everyone knew he meant it as her lover.

“He had to run home for some more clothing, Julian. He should be back soon. I figure I’m safe here at the main house.”

Julian smirked. “Have a lover’s spat?”

“Not that it’s any of your concern, Julian,” she threw his gift at him. “Catch.”

“Sheridan!” he screamed as a sip of his brandy spilled from the snifter. “That wasn’t funny.”

She laughed. “Was to me,” she headed to the door of the parlor. Ivy met her there and hugged her.

“Merry Christmas, Sheridan.”

“Merry Christmas, Ivy,” Sheridan handed her a gift as well. She then handed the last two to Ethan. “I’m going to go get something to eat from the kitchen,” she stated as she headed for the back rooms.

“Sheridan, may I join you?” Theresa asked.

“Oh yes, sister dear, do ask have your future niece help you win over you Latin lover.”

“Shut up, Julian,” Sheridan growled. “Come on, Theresa, let’s see what they have to eat in the place.” She continued walking in direction of the kitchen, refusing to let Julian see her pain.

Beth took no time dressing and returned to the living room to see what Luis was doing. She stopped walking when she saw him sitting on the couch, his head hanging backwards and his eyes closed. Wondering if he was asleep, she tentatively spoke, “Luis?”

His eyes opened and he glanced over at her. “I was remembering the night I brought Sheridan here.”

“Luis, you’re talking as if she’s passed on…or if she’s gone for good. Last time I checked she was sitting at the cottage madly in love with you.”

“If she was so in love with me, why did she say no?”

“Because she’s scared, Luis.”

“We could have worked past that fear…”

“Like you are working through this?”

He just glared at her.

“Luis, I am one of your oldest and dearest friends. In fact, I was your first girlfriend and I have been there for you in some of the direst of times, but right now I think you are in the wrong. Sheridan loves you. She was devastated last night, Luis. She collapsed in tears. You cannot tell me that she has no feelings for you without being called a complete liar.”

Luis sighed and rested his elbows on his knees, placing his head in his hands. “I love her too, Beth.”

“I know, Luis. You love her more than anyone else over the last ten years and there’s no denying she feels the same way.”

“Then what do I do? Do I just keep going on like we were before I proposed?”

“Would that kill you to do until she’s ready? Or do you not love her that much?”

“When did you get so smart?” he sighed, looking at his friend in a new light.

“When I saw my best friends in pain,” Beth smiled weakly. “As much as I hated the fact that you two were getting closer, I have to admit that you are in love. I can’t wait the rest of my life for love that won’t ever happen. I’m going to be thirty soon, Luis, I have to move on and you can’t give up. Use that stubbornness for something good, Luis.”

He chuckled. “I just don’t know if I can get past this.”

“It’s called a wounded ego. It goes away in a few days.”

“Oh, so now I have an bruised ego?”

“If the shoe fits,” she smiled.

He laughed. “It’s going to be hard to see past the ring she turned down. I want to settle down.”

“Think about it this way, Luis, you wouldn’t be marrying her until this case is over. With no leads, you have a few more months before you could even set plans. Look at her negative response as a blessing. It gives you both more time to decide if this is what you want and it keeps you from getting antsy about a wedding that can’t take place until she’s safe.”

“I didn’t think of that.”

“Because you are thinking of the future without realizing the present situation. It’s something you tend to do often.”

“Thanks, Beth.”

“No problem…now did you want those eggs scrambled or fried?”

“Fried…I only eat Sheridan’s scrambled eggs.”

“Fried it is,” Beth walked into the kitchen.

Sheridan wasn’t surprised to find the kitchen staff mulling around to get breakfast ready for the Crane family. After all, there was bound to be a swarm of people in the mansion this evening making their yearly Christmas call to the Crane family.

“Is there something we can help you with, Miss Crane?” one of the cooks asked.

“No, just looking for something to eat that isn’t on the usual Crane menu.” Breakfast was always some over done meal in the mansion on Christmas morning. Sheridan never did enjoy all the food made: cinnamon buns, scrambled eggs, bacon, toast, French toast…an array of food made for a family of four. It was always enough to feed a small army. This morning she wanted something simple and light; she wasn’t feeling well.

“Help yourself,” the young cook smiled and went back to mixing the items for a cake, probably something for the guests this evening.

“Wow, this is the kitchen?” Theresa gasped. It was immense, the size of her living room and the foyer combined. There were rows of counter space, two huge refrigerators and two stoves and ovens. Everything was either black, white or stainless steel.

“Yes,” Sheridan opened the eight-foot tall stainless steel fridge. “Want some eggnog?”

“No thanks,” Theresa looked around in awe.

Getting tired of the noise and fuss, Sheridan looked over at the two cooks. “Can you two give me and my friend some privacy?”

“Right away, Miss Crane,” both grabbed their bowls and disappeared.

“Right now I hate that damn name,” Sheridan slammed the fridge door.

“Oh, and what name would you prefer?” Theresa teased.

Sheridan replied with a glare.

“Shutting up,” Theresa hopped onto a counter.

“I’m sorry, Theresa, I usually reserve this attitude for Luis or Julian, but I can’t seem to help it. I completely ruined Christmas.”

“You didn’t ruin Christmas, Sheridan, you just made a choice that was best for you at the time. Luis is going to come back and he will propose again someday.”

“I don’t think he will. I think he’s going to leave me.”

Theresa laughed.

“What?” Sheridan hardly found the thought of Luis leaving her funny.

“Luis could *never* leave you, Sheridan. He chased you down in Paris; he stayed on your back to get you to tell him what happened on the wharf. He loves you, Sheridan, and nothing or no one will ever change that fact. He needs you in his life more than anything in this world and, despite the fact that you blew it, he still loves you.”

Sheridan sighed and looked down at her hands. She was wearing the ruby ring again. “How could he still love me? I said no.”

“Sheridan, how did you still love him when you heard the man on the wharf?”

“But that wasn’t him!” Sheridan looked at Theresa.

“No, but you thought it was and you still loved him, didn’t you?”

Sheridan nodded. “I loved him so much that I hated him for it.”

“And he loves you. Come on, Ethan and I will take you back to the cottage and wait for Luis.”

“You two don’t have to do that.”

“Sheridan, it’s better than my being around your brother, as much as I know I should respect him for being Ethan’s father, he keeps giving me these looks…”

Sheridan laughed. “Come on, we’ll make our escape.”

“Thanks for breakfast, Beth,” Luis put the last dish away after drying it.

“No problem. Think about what I said, Luis. You love her. It might be hard today, but if you don’t start working it out, you’ll end up loosing her. Don’t forget, Hank is after her too.”

“How can I forget?” he asked, grabbing his jacket and sliding into it. “He’s made it quite clear how he feels about her.”

“If you think he loves her, you’re wrong.”

“What?” Luis paused.

“He doesn’t love her, Luis. You should know how Hank gets when he is really in love. Hank is…Hank wants some of that money she has so much of, Luis. He’ll do anything to live the lifestyle he thinks he deserves. That just happens to be a lifestyle where he won’t have to do anything ever again. For a while, I didn’t think it mattered, especially since I wanted you back in my life. But I’ve learned that it doesn’t matter what I want, Luis, it matters that you are happy and that you are getting what you want. I couldn’t bare to see you unhappy and Sheridan makes you happy.”

“That means a lot, Beth, but why didn’t you tell me he didn’t love her?”

“I figured you knew.”

“I didn’t have a clue,” he finished putting his coat on. “He was going to use her.”

“He certainly was,” Beth agreed, walking him out.

“I won’t let him do that and I certainly won’t let her turn me down. I’ll get a yes out of her and I’ll be married to the woman I love.”

“Well, put in a good word for me with the man I love, would you?”

Luis chuckled. “Not a good request at this time, Beth. Hank won’t even give me the time of day.”

“Because he thinks he has a chance with someone that is obviously head over heels in love with you, Luis. Hank’s a little slow sometimes.”

“I’ve noticed,” he hugged her. “Thanks again.”

“You’re welcome. Now get back to her before she thinks something happened.”

“Merry Christmas, Beth.”

“Merry Christmas, Luis,” she watched as he walked to his car and left. Locking the door, Beth sighed. “Sometimes the right things to do are the hardest in the world.”

Sheridan entered the cottage, Theresa and Ethan right behind her. She tossed her keys on the table by the door and sighed. He wasn’t back yet, not that she really expected him to be. After all, he sounded as if he wouldn’t be back until it was time to go to Pilar’s for Christmas dinner.

“This place looks wonderful, Sheridan. I love the tree,” Ethan walked over to the evergreen and inspected its needles.

“Luis picked it out at a local tree lot. We decorated it ourselves about a week ago,” she replied sadly and slumped onto the couch. “He proposed to me in front of that tree.”

Theresa walked over to Sheridan and knelt in front of her. “Sheridan, don’t torture yourself like this. He does still love you…”

“Aunt Sheridan,” Ethan decided to address her with respect, “If you want to be with him so badly, why did you dare to turn him down?”

“I thought I was doing us both a favor, Ethan,” Sheridan looked down at her lap and fiddled with the edge of her shirt. “I thought that if I said no he wouldn’t be wasting his life taking care of a woman that couldn’t help him with anything…a woman that had no domestic abilities whatsoever.”

“No offense, Sheridan, but Luis knew what he was getting into before he proposed. Why would he have asked if he didn’t want to take you as you were?” Ethan asked, joining her on the couch.

“I don’t know…I just don’t know. I thought he was proposing because I wanted him to…or maybe because he felt it was time to make a commitment or even because it was the next logical step.”

“Sheridan, my brother dated Beth for three years and never even considered proposing. There is no ‘next logical step’ to Luis. He’s always said when he found the right woman he would propose no matter how long they’ve known each other as long as they could be together forever.”

Sheridan sniffled. “I just didn’t want him to regret it and in the long run hate me.”

“He could never do that, Sheridan, I know he couldn’t,” Theresa patted her friend’s knee.

“When he gets back, Sheridan, you should tell him how much you love him and never let him go again,” Ethan hugged his aunt. “Just like I did with Theresa when she tried to leave on the airplane.”

“I wouldn’t have tried to leave had you not been such a sarcastic pain when talking to Chad…”

“Let’s not get into that again, Theresa, I apologized for that.”

“Fine,” she sighed. “In any case, Luis will come back and everything will fall back into place…” Theresa stood and walked to the window, looking out at the snow. ‘It has to,’ she thought to herself.

Luis was flipping through the radio stations, listening to Christmas music and whatever else played as he drove. He wanted to get back home to Sheridan as fast as possible, especially after what Beth said. However, he knew he would tense up as soon as he got to see her again…his angel. That’s exactly what she was: his angel. Her beautiful blonde hair, her big blue eyes and a smile that lit up the entire room.

“And that body,” Luis chuckled. How he missed her the night before…regretted telling her that he would sleep on the couch. “Hopefully it will all be fixed tonight,” he said to himself.

Pressing the gas pedal slightly harder, he continued onto the cottage. He could see the gate ahead of him, the mansion on the hill towering above. Luis hated this place; loathed it in fact. “This is her life, Luis, and you know that if she gets to keep *any* money than she is going to want a decent lifestyle, one above what you live now.”

Luis hit the breaks.

“One above me…” he put the car in park. “What was I thinking?” He looked up at the mansion. “It’s not that she isn’t good enough for me…I’m not good enough for her…”

He just stared at the grounds before him. The large black wrought iron gate encased the acres of land that the home consisted of. Oak and maple trees as well as bushes and flower beds spread as far as the eye could see, though they were now buried slightly beneath the snow. Also under there was the lawn that would be trimmed and well cared for during the spring and summer. He could see the tennis courts, knew where the pool was, had seen the gazebo and walked to the stables. This was heaven and he couldn’t offer her anything more than a small house in the midst of town with two bedrooms and that was only if Sheridan worked and he stopped supporting his family.

“I’m such a fool,” he sighed and looked down at the steering wheel. “A stupid fool.”

“Sheridan, I hate to do this, but I have to get home to Mama. I expected Luis here long before now,” Theresa picked up her pocket book and headed for the door.

“I’m going to leave with her, we promised Pilar we’d help with things before dinner tonight.”

Sheridan nodded. “It’s all right. I’m sure he’ll be back soon. After all, Harmony is a small town and he couldn’t have gotten lost. I mean he was running home right?” Sheridan hated lying to them, but she didn’t need Ethan flipping out over the situation. “He probably had to help Pilar with something before he left…or he got wrapped up in talking to her over something.”

“Yea, he’ll be back soon, Sheridan, don’t worry,” Theresa hugged her goodbye. Ethan followed suit and both walked out the front door and back towards the main house.

“He’ll be back soon, Sheridan,” she said to herself, walking to the window to watch for his car. “He’s got to come back, you’re his job…” She sighed. “Just his job…you really blew it, Sheridan Crane, you passed up the one man in the world that was going to give you everything you’ve dreamed of…”

She looked out at the ground and sighed. Sheridan decided then and there she would give it all up, ever last penny, if Luis would propose just one last time…and this time she wouldn’t let him down.

Pulling up to the cottage, Luis sighed again. He was going to go inside and tell Sheridan he understood what she was talking about and then he was going to retract his proposal. Luis was going to tell her to forget it ever happened and as soon as the stores opened, he would return the ring. After all, he was never going to need it.

Climbing out of the car, he prayed this went easier than planned. He didn’t want to cause a scene, just tell her he understood what she meant, give his point of view and then take back everything he said the night before. He expected a fight, at least part of one, but he prayed for nothing more than some mild bickering and a tear or two. Opening the door, he was surprised when Sheridan threw her arms around his neck and kissed him passionately. Perhaps this wasn’t going to go as easy as he planned.

But as her lips touched his, he melted and pulled her closer to him. Damn, he couldn’t help it; he did love her. Kissing her was like heaven and touching her made him feel alive. Deepening the kiss, he leaned her back against the wall. They didn’t pull away until the need for air defeated their need for each other. Even then, they continued touching, their foreheads meeting as they panted for air.

“Sheridan,” he whispered breathlessly.

“Yes?”

“I…I was going to come in here to do something…”

“What?” she asked hopefully.

“I was going to tell you how I understand why you can’t marry me…in fact I was going to say that I would be ruining your life.”

“What?” she pulled back slightly. “How?”

“By taking you out of this place and making you live in what I can give you. I can’t give you much, Sheridan, and if we married you’d have to give the money, the traveling, the shopping and the connections up. I’m not worth it…I’m not worthy of your love.”

Cupping his face in her hands, Sheridan kissed his lips lightly. “That’s not true. I would trade my whole world for you, Luis. You’re worth all of this and more…you are more than worthy of my love. I don’t want to give you up.”

“I was going to withdraw my proposal for good…”

She covered his lips with her finger. “Just nod…do you want to be with me?”

He nodded.

“Do you still want to take the proposal back permanently?”

He shook the head no and kissed her finger.

“Do you still want to marry me?”

He nodded yes.

“Then when we’re both ready, you’ll propose again and I promise to you I’ll agree, Luis. Right now, we’re not ready.” Her finger ran from his lips, down through the middle of his chest and to his stomach. “I love you.”

“I love you more,” he pulled her to him and kissed her hard and deep. When they separated, she looked above his head and laughed.

“What?”

She pointed up and he joined in the laughter, there above him was a sprig of mistletoe.

“We give new meaning to that Christmas tradition,” she giggled.

He laughed. “God I missed you last night.”

“Hey, you knew where I lived,” she teased.

“But I was stubborn…”

She nodded.

“A fool even…”

She nodded again.

“You don’t have to agree with me all the time you know,” he smiled.

“I don’t always agree, only when you’re right,” rubbing his chest she smiled. “Luis, can we go back to the way we were now?”

“Definitely,” he rubbed her sides. “I definitely want to be with you, Sheridan, more than anything else in this world.”

She hugged him close. “Good, because I wouldn’t know what to do without you.”

“Ditto,” he chuckled and gave her a gentle squeeze. “Now, come on, I want to open my presents,” he released her and headed for the tree.

“Oh no you don’t,” she grabbed his waist. “I want to know where you went first and what brought you back so fast.”

He brought her around in front of him and kissed her cheek. “It started as a drive around town, just to clear my mind and then I ended up at the Book Café. It was closed so I was going to go into the Youth Center and shoot some hoops, but I saw Beth and decided I needed to talk.”

“So you stopped and talked to Beth? What did she say?”

“That if I really loved you, I wouldn’t let anything at all stop me from being with you, not even my stubborn pride. She admitted to having feelings for Hank, very deep feelings, and told me not to give Hank the chance to steal you away. So I decided I had to come home and be with you.”

“And what was all that talk about not being good enough?”

“When I pulled up to the gate, I got a good look at what you would have to give up for marrying a local Harmony police officer. I wondered if I was worth it…”

“You are, so very worth it,” she kissed his lips lightly. “I’m glad you came home.”

“Me too,” he smiled. “Now can we open presents?”

She giggled. “Just let me put some music on,” she stood and fetched her own copy of the Mariah Carey Christmas CD. Popping it into the player, she set it to play number two. Sitting on the floor, she hit play and smiled when the words began.

“Hey, there are some things I like unwrapping more than others,” she winked playfully. “Or should I say undress?”

He laughed. “We can worry about undressing later, right now I want to open the presents.”

“Oh fine,” she pouted, handing him one of hers.

“Thank you,” he was in awe of the expensive gift.

“Turn it over,” she motioned to the backside.

Flipping the pocket watch over, he read the engraving on it.

To my love. Merry first Christmas together. Love you always. Sherry. 12-25-00

“Sheridan, it’s perfect,” he leaned in and kissed her lips gently. “Thank you so much, baby.”

“I’m glad you like it, Luis, I wasn’t sure how you would feel about it.”

“Come here you,” he opened his arms. Sheridan moved over to him and settled between the V of his legs. “I love it, Sheridan, just like I love you.”

“Love you too,” she smiled.

Sheridan tore the paper off the small white box and smiled. She knew what it was before she opened it. Removing the lid, she smiled at the locket inside of the box…but it wasn’t the locket she had seen in the store.

“It was my Great-Grandmothers,” he rubbed her sides gently. “Mama gave it to me years ago to give to Beth. I couldn’t see Beth wearing it; after all, it was meant for my love and I didn’t really love her at that time. So, I hid it away in my room.”

“It’s beautiful,” she traced the small heart.

“Open it.”

She pushed opened the latch and was surprised to find a picture of herself and Luis as children on one side and a picture from Thanksgiving on the other. “Luis, this is so sweet…”

“It gets better. Read the back.”

Sheridan closed the locket and flipped it over. On the back was an engraving. To my angel on our first Christmas together. Love always. Luis 12-25-00

“Luis, I love it. Thank you, sweetheart.”

He hugged her close. “I love you.”

Chapter Seven