Want to learn more about the demented duo known as Razor and Ruudboy? Well, you've (probably) come to the right place. Razor and Ruudboy: The Interview will allow you to discover amazing new things which you likely hadn't even considered before now. It's an in-depth look into the thoughts, dreams and opinions of the creators of this website - and now that you've read the description, we're positive that you won't leave until you've read the actual interview. Let's get started already...
QUESTION: So, who exactly are you guys, anyway?
Razor: You can call me Razor...
Ruudboy: ...and I am Ruudboy.
Razor: Together, we're known as Razor and Ruudboy.
Ruudboy: Or sometimes, Ruudboy and Razor.
Razor: Actually, no one ever calls us that.
Ruudboy: Well, I do.
QUESTION: Who's the so-called "leader" of your
two-person group?
Ruudboy: We don't really have a "leader"...
Razor: But if there were such a thing, I would be it.
Ruudboy: Fortunately for the safety and well-being
of the universe as a whole, Razor has not been granted
any positions of real power.
Razor: You won't have to wait too much longer.
QUESTION: How long has Razor and Ruudboy: The Website been open?
Razor: Well, we don't have an exact figure, although I wish we did, but I know that we first started this site in early 1998 - I believe it was in February. You wouldn't have even wanted to see it back then, trust me; it was rather hideous, because at the time neither of us knew anything about what we were doing.
Ruudboy: I always thought it was pretty cool...I don't understand why nobody liked it.
Razor: Okay then...anyhow, in the fall of 1999, I went in and totally redesigned the website, changing it to the current format and adding a ton of new pages, since the old version only had one or two. That's when Razor and Ruudboy: The Website first began to get more popular, until it reached the lofty status that it now holds.
QUESTION: How do each of you feel about your respective "roles" on this website?
Ruudboy: Well, for the most part, I'm fine with pretty much everything Razor does, but occasionally he portrays me as an idiot on some of the pages, and I really don't care for that too much.
Razor: I do no such thing! Well, except for that one section...but other than that, I've always done my best to show the more sensitive, intelligent side of my good friend Ruudboy.
Ruudboy: Yeah right!
Razor: At least I'm happy with
my role on Razor and Ruudboy: The Website.
Ruudboy: Only because you make yourself out to be about five times smarter than you really are!
Razor: Which is still at least five times smarter than...uh...where was I?
Ruudboy: I rest my case. Now what do you say?
Razor: (sighs) Well played.
QUESTION: Never mind. Anyhow, on to the next question. How are the two of you dealing with your new-found fame?
Ruudboy: Fame? What fame?
Razor: He's talking to me, Ruudboy...I think I've done a pretty good job of staying levelheaded, despite the thousands of people who love and adore me.
Ruudboy: You liar! First of all, you're the most conceited person I've ever met, and second, we really haven't gotten to the point of "fame and notoriety" yet, but we're still working on it.
Razor: Well, you're right about one thing: we are always trying to promote this website and get the word out that Razor and Ruudboy have officially arrived on the scene, if you will. Then again, we first arrived on the scene back in early 1998, so maybe we do need to work just a little harder on spreading our influence across the Web. Either that, or Ruudboy could stop scaring people to the point where they never want to come back.
Ruudboy: Ouch. I'll get you for that one.
Razor: Ha ha.
QUESTION: Where do the two of you see yourselves in ten years?
Razor: I don't know about Ruudboy here, but I'm going
to be rich and famous. I'm not quite sure how I'm going to achieve that status yet, but give me time and I'll come up with something.
Ruudboy: In ten years, I plan to be as far away from Razor as possible. No, wait, just kidding. Actually, I don't know what I'll be doing in ten years, but you can bet that it'll be better than picking scraps out of garbage cans and dumpsters, like Razor will be doing.
Razor: You really know how to hurt a guy, don't you?
Ruudboy: I learned everything I know from you, but of course that only took about five minutes or so.
Razor: Somebody help me out, I'm getting destroyed here...
QUESTION: What are your favorite video games?
Razor: You're kind of changing topics just a little bit, aren't you? Well, nowadays I don't always have as much time to play video games as I used to, but I do have a couple of favorites. One of them is without a doubt "Goldeneye" for the Nintendo 64...
Ruudboy: You jerk! You stole my answer! You knew I was going to say that!
Razor: You deserved it for making fun of me so much. Now let me finish. I'm also a big fan of fighting/wrestling games, but now that I think about it, I don't have but a few specific favorites; I just play whatever looks appealing.
Ruudboy: Sounds like a good strategy to me.
Razor: You know, that's not very nice.
Ruudboy: Neither was taking my answer.
Razor: I already told you, you deserved it!
QUESTION: Okay, that's enough of that. Do you have
any favorite TV shows?
Ruudboy: Of course we have favorite TV shows. What kind of a stupid question is that?
Razor: He means, what TV shows do we like best?
Ruudboy: Oh.
Razor: I'll go first, because you evidently need some time to think. I enjoy animated programs (such as "The Simpsons"), comedic masterpieces like "The Tom Green Show,"
any World Wrestling Federation program (because wrestling rules), and not much else, to tell you the truth. Oh, wait, I also like checking out local cable access shows from time
to time.
Ruudboy: I like "The Simpsons" too, as well as football, basketball, and sports like that. Also, there are certain music videos I'll watch, but other than that--
Razor: Ooo, you watch sports and music videos! No one else does that, you crazy rebel.
Ruudboy: There's no need for sarcasm.
Razor: By the way, you forgot to tell them how much you enjoy watching any show rated "TV-Y" because those kinds of shows are perfect for your intelligence level.
Ruudboy: Oh, yeah? Well, why don't you tell them how much you love to watch "Family Matters" for hours on end?
Razor: That's nothing to be ashamed of!
Ruudboy: It is when your favorite character on the show is Steve Urkel.
Razor: Hey, Steve Urkel is cool.
QUESTION: (Sigh...) Favorite bands?
Ruudboy: Anything punk.
Razor: Anything but punk. I also avoid country music and bubblegum pop, for that matter.
Ruudboy: What do you mean, "anything but punk"?!
Razor: Now who's got limited comprehension skills?
Ruudboy: I don't understand what you're trying to say.
QUESTION: How about your personal favorite quotes?
Razor: Geez, how many of these "favorite" questions are you going to ask us? My favorite quote is by the late, great Morris the Cat: "If you don't waltz in like you own the place, you never will."
Ruudboy: That's a dumb quote.
Razor: No way, dude. At least it's better than yours.
Ruudboy: I don't even have one.
Razor: That's my point!
Ruudboy: I give up...
Razor: You know what they say: "Quitters never win, and winners never quit."
Ruudboy: You know what else they say? "Know your role and shut your mouth."
Razor: Good one.
Ruudboy: Thank you.
QUESTION: Razor, you've publicly stated that you don't care for websites that play MIDI files in the background. Why, then, does this site feature several pages which include MIDIs?
Razor: Partly for satire purposes, and partly because Ruudboy wanted to put some MxPx songs on the website, so we found a couple and added them to the various "Ruudboy-themed" sections. Also, there are
pages such as
Razor and Ruudboy's TV Room which just seem that much better with music playing.
Ruudboy: How do you like the songs I picked out, by the way?
Razor: They're terrible.
Ruudboy: I was asking what's-his-face here, not you.
QUESTION: They're just fine. Well, I think that'll do it for now...
Razor: Oh, no you don't, buddy! You sit right there and ask us some more questions. I'm not done tearing Ruudboy apart yet!
Ruudboy: And I'm not done proving what a low-grade moron Razor is yet.
Razor: Do you see what I'm up against now?
QUESTION: Let me ask you both something: Do you fight all the time like this in real life, or am I just lucky?
Razor: It's a show that we're putting on for you because we think you're so special.
Ruudboy: Yeah, now start asking us better questions or we'll hire a new interviewer! Can we do that?
Razor: Yeah, we can.
Ruudboy: I told you so. Challenge us for once! We yearn to be challenged!
QUESTION: Okay, okay. What do you think of people who criticize Razor and Ruudboy: The Website for not really serving any true purpose?
Ruudboy: I didn't mean for you to challenge us that much.
Razor: I'll handle this. Everybody has a right to their opinion, but those people are obviously wrong. This website does indeed serve a purpose...it's here to make our beloved viewers laugh! Originally, it was just a personal webpage which came about as a result of a joint effort
between Ruudboy and myself, but nowadays it actually has a reason for existence. It's on a much higher plane than it ever was before we turned it into something worthwhile.
Ruudboy: What he said.
QUESTION: Now let's get into some more technical questions. How often is Razor and Ruudboy: The Website updated?
Razor: Whenever I feel like it, which is usually about once every few days or so.
Ruudboy: Simple question, simple answer.
Razor: More like simple mind.
QUESTION: So, who does the bulk of the work around here?
Razor: I do most of the actual webmastering, you know, HTML work and that sort of thing, but Ruudboy helps out quite a bit by giving me creative feedback and coming up with new ideas for pages. Have you ever been to
And Here's A Picture of a YAK? That was Ruudboy's masterpiece. Do you really think even I could come up with something like that?
Ruudboy: I'm very proud of it, personally. I think it makes a bold statement about...um...yaks, or whatever.
Razor: Precisely. I totally agree. In fact, I think if there's one thing this world could use more of, it's yaks...I'm not saying this, Ruudboy.
Ruudboy: Oh, come on! You told me you would!
Razor: I told you I might if you paid me ten bucks, but there's no way I'm going to read this drivel out loud. How could anyone write 23 pages about how cool yaks are?
Ruudboy: They are cool.
QUESTION: Speaking of which, what individual page on this website are the two of you most proud of?
Razor: That's a tough one, let me think for a minute...well, I'm going to have to give you a pretty lame answer: I like all of our webpages about the same. It's too difficult to pick one that I'm most proud of personally. However, if you were to ask me which pages I
hate the most, I'd tell you--
Ruudboy: (interrupting) My favorite page is probably the best one on the entire website, "And Here's A Picture of a YAK". As far as my least favorite page goes, it's got to be--
Razor: (interrupting) Nobody cares about what you think. But I'm sure all these wonderful people would enjoy hearing about how much I hate the--
QUESTION: I can take a hint. Which pages do the two of you dislike the most?
Razor: Well, now I can't even remember.
Ruudboy: Neither can I. We love all of them, I guess.
Razor: (sadly) But I was so sure...
Ruudboy: Well, you were wrong. Again.
QUESTION: Any final thoughts before we have to go?
Razor: Uh, yeah. I just wanted to remind all the addicted Web-surfers out there that even if nobody else in the world wants to talk to you, Razor and Ruudboy: The Website is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week without fail.
Ruudboy: Just like Git n' Go, except we don't sell snack foods and we don't have a cool, fancy, instantly-recognizable logo!
Razor: Also, we're not a respected nationwide chain of convenience stores, and you can't fill your car up with premium, affordable gasoline when you're at Razor and Ruudboy: The Website.
Ruudboy: To make matters even worse, we don't get paid above minimum wage to work here--we do it for free! At Git n' Go, America's favorite convenience store, even the laziest of workers can finally be paid what they feel they're worth!
Razor: But other than those things, Razor and Ruudboy: The Website is just about nearly identical to Git n' Go in almost every single possible way with a few minor exceptions which we have yet to mention or have simply forgotten.
Ruudboy: We're outta here, thanks for visiting.
Razor: See you later.
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