The Bruce Roast presented by the Northeast Ohio Friars Club

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The Bruce Roast

The

Bruce Roast

Sunday, September 25, 2005

10:30 p.m.

Johnny T's (tentatively), Northfield Village

Introduction

He's raunchy, cocky, and has scaly ears. You love him or hate him, the Bruce Roast is going down. This is going to be a chance for some newcomers to try it out, some others for redemption, and for the affiliates and members to drop some free shots on "Bruceless."

We are celebrating his 21st birthday and him leaving Outback after three years in style. Come join us, and you won't regret it.

01/21/2005 09:26 PM

Speaker List

in tentative order, with flaws

1. Kyle Wells, roastmaster

Big head

Whipped

Does nothing at work

Lobster Claw Design Group

2. Angelo Butto, Mike Glozer, and John ??

Two of them are loud and they all like weed and drinking.

3. Gary Sweatt

sunken eyes

poor record sales

Addiction to computer games

All talk, no show

4. John Ruediger

Monotone

works at Aldi's

Got a huge settlement

5. Brad Spence

Poor guitar skills

coming into work with hickeys

Poor work ethic

6. Sean Kramer

keep in mind the page creator is writing this

Dig it up yourself, or e-mail my wife for dirt, kramershelley@yahoo.com.

7. Reba Hoffman

stressed out all the time

nervous twitch

Begging to sell candy

Fascination with young boys (i.e. bussers)

8. Keith Ostrowski

Likes drugs and "gaggers"

Childish, with pranks etc.

The dirty sanchez

Has a big head

8. Courtney Lentini

Says she gets sweat under her boobs

"anyways"

High-pitched voice

Likes to drink

Consistenly has guy troubles

9. Gabe Hunter

Possibly gay

Quick promotion

Very quiet guy, need more info

10. Kyle Kramer, keynote speaker

Wants to be a fireman

Obsessive Compulsive

Secret career dream is to become a stand-up comedian

11. Bruce Stevens, rebuttal

(see flaw list to the left)

Roast home

Bruce Stevens, the official flaw sheet

Poor work ethic

Stinks

Looks like Booger from Revenge of the Nerds

Yellow teeth

Scaly ears

Cocky, thinks he's the best

Spends his money uselessly (i.e. souping his car up)

Drinking problem

His dream is to become a member of Pimp My Ride

Calls himself a Chef... at Outback

Does not bath for days

Amanda blew the surprise, so make fun of her too.

Known as "Queen of Thongs" by Bruce

Whiny voice

Kramertime Navigator

The Northeast Ohio Friars Club is a non-profit organization that regularly gets together for roasts. The club provides a unique source of entertainment and a chance for local comics to enter into the comedy scene.

Kramertime is written and originally produced by Sean Kramer. He retains copyright to all of the creative content provided. Of course, that would be open to interpretation, assuming it were creative. Anyhow, I hope you enjoy a slice of my sick little mind.