by Sailormoon5645
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15
PLOT: Fourteen-year-old Serena Harvey's older sister, Ray, has everything. She's pretty, popular, has tons of friends, and now she has a cool boyfriend. But that last item may not be hers for much longer, as Serena finds that she and Darien Shields are falling for one another....
NEW CHARACTERS: N/A
LENGTH: 11875 words
RATING: PG
COMMENTS: When Handel completed his oratorios, Messiah, in 24 days, he declared that he had been in a madness, as if derived from God himself. At least, that's the story I heard about it. Either way, the moral is that great things can sometimes come from rushing through your work like a maniac.
This dub-based fanfic, written in the course of three days, is, of course, not an example of that. There're misspellings a'plenty, pointless A/Ns about how the author's been grounded, continual POV issues and script format dialogue. And then there's the character molestation of the "Biotch" named "Ray" (is Sailor Mars a transvestite now?), who is turned into the older sister from the seventh layer of Hell, adding a layer of revengefic into the mix. You have to wonder if the author has sibling issues in real life with the way Raye is written, because that's the only way the characterization makes any sense.
What makes this even more laughable is that people think that making Mars' dub name masculine is amazing stuff. One of the reviews said (and I quote directly) "This was one of the greatest stories ever!" No, Dracula was one of the greatest stories ever. As for this, I'm not totally sure if it even qualifies as a story or as a vent against the author's oh-so-tyrannical family who put a curfew on her, one that better belongs on Myspace. You make the call.
Sailor Moon and related characters are copyrighted ©1991-2007 Naoko Takeuchi.
