Z Ranking
Schwarzenegger
Conan the Barbarian
The Terminator
True Lies
see also GOP
Bruce Willis
The Last Boy Scout
Die Hard I, II, III
Armageddon
Stallone
General
Beowulf
The 13th Warrior
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Movie Summaries
Johnny Z's Take on action movies.
Conan the Barbarian
A Masterpiece. Highest Recommendation Schwarzenegger's first starring role. His English isn't great, but heck, he's a barbarian -- it's not supposed to be great! The narration, soundtrack, epic storyline, and supporting cast (including James Earl Jones) all speak to a movie masterpiece. As my friend the Dominican Devil has said, this is the perfect movie.
For his acting debut, Arnold was just awesome. His drunk scenes are almost unparalleled, the lines he does have he delivers with force and the humorous twinkle in his eye. There is nudity and graphic violence, and it's awesome, especially the graphic violence. Own this movie. Watch it with your friends, your spouse, your kids. Possibly the greatest movie ever.
Conan the Destroyer
Recommended Conan the Destroyer is only rated PG-13, as opposed to R for the original. The rating is a metaphor for the quality of the movies. Conan the Destroyer is worth watching, because you get more Conan, but the supporting characters are not as good, the plot is not as good, there's no sex and less violence. Still, could it really be expected to live up to the original?
The 13th Warrior
Mmmm, Viking women! (Maria BomGood guy movie, surprisingly. Antonio Banderas is an Arab ambassador to the ancestors of the Vikings in Eastern Europe. The rest is half Beowulf, half Seven Samurai, with the 'Wendol' in place of the traditional Grendel. Classic story, they can't do too much to mess it up.
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