 |
| Archived Video Reviews (H) |
 HALF
PAST DEAD - D+Starring: Steven Seagal, Morris Chestnut, Ja Rule, Kurupt, Nia Peeples, Claudia Christian, June McPherson, Tony Plana, Mo'Nique Directed by: Don Michael Paul Action, 98 min (14A) (Columbia Tristar, 2002) Teaming with rapper DMX in the moderately commercial (though hardly critical) hit Exit Wounds (2001) artificially extended Steven Seagal's long-dormant theatrical career, but the same formula brings even smaller returns with Half Past Dead, a ludicrous actioner that pairs Seagal with rap stars Ja Rule and Kurupt. Seagal, moving with all the grace and energy of an intoxicated bear, plays a Russian (!) inmate in the new Alcatraz who gets caught up in a scheme involving a group of thugs (led by Seagal's Under Siege 2 costar Morris Chestnut) who have broken into the prison to locate millions of dollars worth of stolen gold. When you get right down to it, though, it is Seagal's stunt doubles that appear to be doing most of the work here since watching the bloated ex-action star lumber and mumble around, he barely seems able to walk, let alone kick butt. For what it is worth, Ja Rule does add some energy to the project as Seagal's buddy, but this is such ridiculous action cheese - featuring, among other inanities, perky Nia Peeples as a supposedly heartless villainess and a prison set that looks about as high tech as a station wagon - that the film never accomplishes anything besides living up to its title. Bury this one in an unmarked grave. (top) (back)  HALLOWEEN:
RESURRECTION - DStarring: Jamie Lee Curtis, Busta Rhymes, Tyra Banks, Bianca Kajlich, Thomas Ian Nicholas, Sean Patrick Thomas, Brad Loree Directed by: Rick Rosenthal Horror, 89 min (18A) (Dimension, 2002) You can't keep a good villain down and, as this eighth edition in the Halloween saga illustrates, you can't keep a bad one down either. Long since stripped of the spooky presence he once had in 1978's Halloween, masked knife-man Michael Myers is now as decrepit and dull as Friday the 13th's Jason, a one-note boogeyman too old to be stalking teenagers and too dull to warrant any more chills. In this boneheaded sequel - so idiotic it rips off the spectacularly bad Blair Witch sequel Book of Shadows - Busta Rhymes and Tyra Banks play Web entrepreneurs who enlist a group of nubile, fame-hungry teenagers (including Bianca Kajlich and Sean Patrick Thomas) to spend Halloween night in Myers' old childhood home while their activities are broadcast on-line. Since it turns out that the man Jamie Lee Curtis beheaded in 1998's Halloween: H20 wasn't actually Myers (don't you hate it when that happens?), one doesn't have to put much effort into predicting where this is going, namely stabbings, beheadings, sex and blood all live for an Internet audience. Directed by Rick Rosenthal, who also had the dubious honors with 1981's Halloween II, Resurrection is about as lifeless and rote as slasher movies get. Die Michael die. (top) (back)  HAMLET
- BStarring: Ethan Hawke, Kyle MacLachlan, Diane Venora, Liev Schreiber, Julia Stiles, Steve Zahn, Bill Murray, Sam Shepard Directed by: Michael Almereyda Drama, 111 min (14A) (Miramax, 2000) Many time-altering interpretations of Shakespearean works tend to get by on sheer inventiveness alone (1996's Romeo + Juliet, 1999's Titus), but director Michael Almereyda wants more than to update Hamlet for modern-day Manhattan - he wants to reimagine it for our media-soaked times. As a result, the Danish prince bent on revenge is now a moody video artist (Ethan Hawke) whose murdered father (Sam Shepard) was the CEO of the mighty Danish corporation and who's businessman uncle (Kyle MacLachlan) recently married his mother (Diane Venora). Among the talented cast, Hawke proves to be the biggest disappointment - offering a monotonous performance only occasionally fuelled with rage or sorrow - but, for the most part, Almereyda's vision works to spin the original play into new directions. Among his more inspired touches: setting Hamlet's "To be or not to be" soliloquy in the action section of a Blockbuster, Hamlet's use of an shocking short film to expose his uncle's guilt, and the concept of envisioning Polonius (Bill Murray) as a corporate weasel who uses wiretaps on his own daughter Ophelia (Julia Stiles). (top) (back)  HANGING
UP
- C-Starring: Meg Ryan, Diane Keaton, Lisa Kudrow, Walter Matthau, Adam Arkin, Cloris Leachman, Jesse James Directed by: Diane Keaton Drama, 95 min (PG) (Columbia Tristar, 2000) From the posters and advertisements for Hanging Up, one might expect the film to be a fast and loose female comedy along the lines of The First Wives Club. But oh, how looks can be deceiving. Although Meg Ryan, Diane Keaton and Lisa Kudrow all get prominent billing, this slow-moving and sentimentally bloated picture doesn’t focus on the relationship between its kooky sisters so much as the struggle of one of those sisters (Ryan) to cope with the wild mood swings of her ailing father (Walter Matthau). Directed by Keaton from a semi-autobiographical screenplay by Delia and Nora Ephron, the film doesn’t contain a single moment that rings true and none of the emotions run deeper than the superficial mark. Ryan, Keaton and Kudrow are all talented actresses, but the screenplay stifles any humour they may bring to the picture and most of their scenes are linked by endless telephone conversations. Hang up already. (top) (back)  HANNIBAL
- B-Starring: Anthony Hopkins, Julianne Moore, Giancarlo Giannini, Ray Liotta, Gary Oldman, Frankie Faison, Zeljko Ivanek, Francesca Neri Directed by: Ridley Scott Suspense, 131 min (18A) (MGM, 2001) Considering the critical acclaim of The Silence of the Lambs, it could have easily been predicted that this gruesome sequel, based on the novel by Thomas Harris, would disappoint. What is surprising is the fact that, for the most part, the filmmakers here seem to have forgotten what made 1991 picture so successful in the first place. In Silence, Jonathan Demme drew a lingering nightmare intensity from the mind-bending relationship between psychiatrist-turned-psycho cannibal Hannibal Lecter (Anthony Hopkins) and steely FBI agent Clarice Sterling (Jodie Foster in Silence, Julianne Moore here). For much of Hannibal, however, Lecter and Sterling are on different continents, with Lecter on the loose in Italy and Sterling back on his trail after 10 years. Because of the characters' almost separate stories, Hannibal offers little sense of impending terror, with director Ridley Scott (Gladiator) dishing out gore instead of complex psychological interaction and never really overcoming the pointless of the entire story. That's not to say Hannibal is without its rewards - there are some genuine thrills, all of them filmed beautifully, and the performances are top-rate - it is just that, considering this film's pedigree, it all should have been much tastier. (top) (back)  HAPPY,
TEXAS
- B-Starring: Jeremy Northam, Steve Zahn, William H. Macy, Ally Walker, Illeana Douglas, Ron Perlman, M.C. Gainley Directed by: Mark Illsley Comedy, 98 min (14A) (Miramax, 1999) It's too formula-driven to be a runaway success, but an inspired comic cast ensures that this southern-fried comedy has its share of 10-gallon laughs. The Winslow Boy's Jeremy Northam and the wonderfully zany Steve Zahn (Out of Sight) play a couple of Texas convicts who break out of prison, highjack an RV, and wind up posing as a couple of gay pageant directors in order to rob a small town bank. There's a little romance along the way (Northam falls for Ally Walker's bank teller, Zahn for Illeana Douglas' sexually hungry school teacher) and all of the principal actors are so spirited that it is easy to get caught up in the hijinks. Among the standouts are Zahn, who buzzes about with against-the-grain comic timing, and a blissfully touching William H. Macy as the nice-guy local sheriff. Happy, Texas may have an uneven screenplay that restricts the comedy from reaching extremely silly heights, but it is certainly entertaining enough to leave you feeling, well, happy. (top) (back)  HARDBALL
- CStarring: Keanu Reeves, Diane Lane, D.B. Sweeney, John Hawkes, DeWayne Warren, Mike McGlone, Julian Griffith, Michael Perkins Directed by: Brian Robbins Comedy, 106 min (PG) (Paramount, 2001) After having only recently paid tribute to/ripped off the Bad News Bears with The Replacements, Keanu Reeves returns to the ragtag-group-learns-to-act-as-a-team-and-emerge-victorious genre with Hardball, a baseball-in-the-ghetto tale that may be inspired by a true story, but reeks of only-in-the-movies clichés. Reeves plays Conor O'Neill, a compulsive gambler who, in desperate need of some money, agrees to coach a group of underprivileged kids from the Chicago projects. There's far more inner-city grit here than you would find in, say, The Mighty Ducks, but Hardball is just as simplistic and formulaic as that earlier film, spending far more time hitting every play in the book (the coach's redemption in the hands of his team, a pointless romance with schoolteacher Diane Lane, the trip to a major league game…) than attempting to bring depth or a novel idea to the predictable story. Reeves, taking a step down following his terrifying work in The Gift, is outperformed here by the young cast, even if most of the young actors are playing standard sports movie "types" instead of characters. The MVP trophy here goes to little DeWayne Warren, a pint-sized scene-stealer who contributes more than his share of laughs and some genuine heart. (top) (back)  HARRY
POTTER AND THE CHAMBER OF SECRETS - B+Starring: Daniel Radcliffe, Kenneth Branagh, Rupert Grint, Emma Watson, Robbie Coltrane, Richard Harris, Maggie Smith, Alan Rickman Directed by: Chris Columbus Drama, 161 min (PG) (Warner Bros., 2002) Fans of Harry Potter and the entire gang at Hogwarts have every reason to rejoice: though affected by many of the same limitations as Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone (particularly an unwarranted epic running time and occasionally constrained direction by Chris Columbus), Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets is an altogether more magical, looser and better effort than the first film in the series. Daniel Radcliffe, starting to resemble a young John Lennon in his round spectacles, leads the returning cast of wizards and Muggles as Harry, legendary boy of magic, best friend to Ron (Rupert Grint) and Hermoine (Emma Watson), and second year student at Hogwarts School of Wizardry and Witchcraft. There's a sinister evil at work this semester, however, and the ethnic cleansing overtone of J.K. Rowling's novel adds new layers of darkness and shadow to the characters. Radcliffe, Grint and Watson have developed into a charming team and British acting heavyweights such as Richard Harris, Maggie Smith and Alan Rickman return as members of the Hogwarts faculty, but here they are all overshadowed by the scene-stealing antics of a hilariously egocentric Kenneth Branagh as Harry's new teacher, a grinning Dr. Phil figure for the magic crowd. (top) (back) |
