Then some more people came down and they were followed by a whole film crew! I mean everyone was there! It was so ridiculous that they were trying to portray three people, alone on a quiet beach, telling each other their deepest secrets in total privacy.

Meanwhile, two drunken British guys were just meters away and ogling the girls in their bikinis!
I was just dying to burst out into song, but though better of it.

We are, after all, from Britain. Her Majesty the Queen, and all that.

However, I did wonder what would happen if, just as one of the ladies was about to tell her most innermost thoughts and feelings, this incredibly hairy Welshman were to burst through, streaking butt naked, rip off the girls' bikini tops with lust filled savagery and dive into the pounding surf, whilst screaming like a crazy baboon and screaming how "Fu**ing cold!!!!" the water was...

Well. It was just a thought...