Site hosted by Angelfire.com: Build your free website today!


Here is my ever-growing collection of some of the best clean religious jokes that I've come across. To the best of my knowledge these are just jokes and not based on actual facts; so please do not be offended if you have fallen victim to any similar circumstances. At any rate, feel free to send me any jokes that you may have, and I'll post them here as well.

Click Below for a Printable Version of a Joke:

Back to Home Page
Back to Main Jokes Page
The Sin of Lying
Church Bulletin Bloopers
Standing Room Only
Drawing a Picture
The Incorrect Diagnosis
Children to Church
Wrong Address
Praise the Lord
The Bible
Holy Water
The Preacher's Ass
Don't Step on a Duck
3,000 Year-Old Mummy
The River
Back to Main Jokes Page
Back to Main Page
Check back soon for more religious jokes! Send in your best religious jokes!  Home
Church Bulletin Bloopers

     1) The outreach committee has enlisted 25 visitors to make calls on people who are not afflicted with any church.

     2) The Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10. All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B.S. is done.

     3) Evening massage - 6 p.m.

     4) Low Self-Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 to 8:30 p.m. Please use the back door.

     5) This Sunday afternoon, there will be a meeting of the Little Mothers Club. All those wishing to become Little Mothers, please meet the pastor in his private study.

     6) The third verse of Blessed Assurance will be sung without musical accomplishment.

     7) For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

     8) The Rev. Merriwether spoke briefly, much to the delight of the audience.

     9) This evening, a special offering will be taken to defray the expense of the new carpet. All those wishing to do something on the carpet, please come foward and get a piece of paper.

     10) This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Brown to come foward and lay an egg on the altar.

     11) The pastor will preach his farewell message, after which the choir will sing, "Break Forth Into Joy."

     12) During the absence of our pastor, we enjoyed the rare privilege of hearing a good sermon when J.F. Stubbs supplied our pulpit.

     13) Next Sunday Mrs. Vinson will be soloist for the morning service. The pastor will then speak on "It's a Terrible Experience."

     14) Due to the Rector's illness, Wednesday's healing services will be discontinued until further notice.

     15) The music for today's service was all composed by George Friedrich Handel in celebration of the 300th anniversary of his birth.

     16) Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community.

     17) The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the church basement on Friday at 7 p.m. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.

     18) The concert held in Fellowship Hall was a great success. Special thanks are due to the minister's daughter, who labored the whole evening at the piano, which as usual fell upon her.

     19) A song fest was hell at the Methodist church Wednesday.

     20) Hymn 43: "Great God, what do I see here?" Preacher: The Rev. Horace Blodgett Hymn 47: "Hark! an awful voice is sounding"

     21) On a church bulletin during the minister's illness: GOD IS GOOD, Dr. Hargreaves is better.

     22) Potluck supper: prayer and medication to follow.

     23) Don't let worry kill you off - let the church help.

     24) Pastor is on vacation. Massages can be given to church secretary...

     25) 8 new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.

     26) The choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir.

     27) Weight Watchers will meet at 7 p.m.. Please use large double door at the side entrance.

     28) Barbara remains in the hospital and needs blood donors for more transfusions. She is also having trouble sleeping and requests tapes of Pastor Jack's sermons.

     29) Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person(s) you want remembered.

     30) Next Thursday, there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get.

     31) Missionary from Africa speaking at Calvary Memorial Church in Racine: Name: Bertha Belch. Announcement: "Come tonight and hear Bertha Belch all the way from Africa."

     32) Announcement in a church bulletin for a National Prayer & Fasting Conference: "The cost for attending the Fasting & Prayer conference includes Meals.

Back to Top
Check back soon for more religious jokes! Send in your best religious jokes!  Home

Designed by Justin Jones