![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
|||||||||||||||||||
![]() |
||||||||||||||||||||||
|
||||||||||||||||||||||
|
||||||||||||||||||||||
As a service to our employees and to you, our loyal customers, WeeSaul World Heavy Industries,
Ltd. is offering free this basic course in middle management principles. We have spent years
developing and improving upon these concepts and have found that they will work in any and all
situations. We can only hope that you will take from this course even a small bit of information
and use the knowledge gained herein to aspire to the position of authority that you truly
deserve and desire. May the (work)force be with you.
Middle Management 101Numero Uno Golden Rule: Empower your employees so that they can make all decisions of importance. Give them the power and authority to do all things in the way that deem fit since they are the "experts". This will give your employees a sense of belonging, a small part of the "big picture" so to speak. Your employees will better capable of doing their jobs and will be more highly motivated to work towards the goals of the corporation, the ultimate goal being the bottom. For the love of money, we shall incorporate and the corporation be king. If and when the decisions that these empowered workers turn out to be wrong, you may say to the folks at corporate, "Hey, that's what the plebes wanted, so I gave it 'em." And you shall retain your job but it may turn out to be a good time to update your resume and look for another similar position for you may find that your advancement within the corporation has come to an end. This may not be a bad thing though if you have absolutely no ambition to advance you career or if you are "comfortable" on the plateau you find youself on. And it shows the members of upper management that you have at least tried to do what is in the best interest of the corporation and you deserve the chance at least to rectify the situation which may take a very long time but it is far better than being unemployeed which you would be if the decision had been entirely your own. And if by a freak of nature or a miracle of fate, the decision turns out to be a good one, you shall receive full credit thereby moving you one rung up the corporate stairway to Heaven, Amen. Numero Dos Golden Rule: All rules other than Numero Uno Golen Rule shall be placed before a committee made up of representives of every department where untold hours shall be wasted debating their merits. This ensures that those under you will have have something to keep them occupied with for idle hands are the Devil's ROI killers. Now go unto the world with this knowledge and aspire to the lofty heights of upper management, my children... This Resource is provided free of charge by WeeSaul World Heavy Industries, Ltd., a Division of WeeSaul World, plc. and can not be reproduce in any form without the express written consent of the CEO who is not afraid to bring the full weight of the legal system of WeeSaul's World down upon the shoulders of those who piss him off. Thank you so very much and have a glorious day. |
||||||||||||||||||||||
|