::TUESDAY NIGHT TURBULENCE::
20th August 2002
Cwmbran Centre

[In the sold out Cwmbran Centre, fireworks blast all over as Turbulence kicks off another new show. Once the pyro has ended and the lights raised upwards, we join Captain Mosher and The Greasy Mexican over at the announce desk.]

MOSHER: “What an event Shindig Slam was! An event where three new champions were crowned; a partnership dissolved, two brutal special matches and a highly controversial Championship match, the ramifications of Shindig Slam will no doubt be felt throughout the show! This is Captain Mosher and The Greasy Mexican saying, Welcome to Turbulence!”

MEXICAN: “Oh yeah, hola indeed, but what about the show tonight Capataino? We got that huge main event with Kyle Reece challenging The Huckster! Two days after both had gruelling matches at Shindig Slam, how will they fare when asked to go one on one? It’s gonna be a hot one!”

MOSHER: “And don’t forget Stone Cold Andy Morgan and Disco Stu one on one here tonight! Can these former allies patch up their differences?!”

MEXICAN: “Hahaha! Don’t count on it, essa!”

[Suddenly the lights in the arena plunge downwards, throwing the building into near darkness. As an eerie atmosphere fills the Cwmbran Centre, “I Stand Alone” hits over the PA. The music may be new but the fans recognise the familiar McMartynTron video, and sure Dan Jones strides out down the entrance ramp and to the ring. Dan is dressed in his usual long dark leather coat, hair tied back tight in a harsh ponytail, no hint of emotion on his steely face. In his right hand, Dan Jones carries a black steel chair. The fans jeer and boo vehemently as the scourge of the CWF Championship Match at Shindig Slam climbs into the ring and waits patiently for his music to be cut. The lights go back up and Dan stands before the booing crowds with microphone in hand, ready to address the public.]

MOSHER: “Listen to this reaction … Dan Jones must the most unpopular wrestler in this company tonight … and no surprise, considering his heinous actions of two nights ago!”

MEXICAN: “Man, Dan Jones looks the business out there tonight! So silent and strong, and sure of his own abilities! You know Capataino, people say me and Dan Jones are just like each other!!”

MOSHER: “You and Dan Jones like each other? Yeah right, and I’m Arranboy…”

DAN: “A lot of people have been wondering the motives behind my involvement in the CWF Title match last Sunday night were … whether I did it out of pure spite for Phil, or whether to help my father, The Huckster, reclaim his lost glory. Well despite what may be said, I’m not that low a person- I do have morals, there are some things even I would consider too underhanded…”

[Dan pauses briefly to soak up the crowd reaction.]

DAN: “ … And helping that foolish old dinosaur win the CWF Title is one of them!! Oh that’s right, boo me, I don’t care. Bob Jones may be my father, but he’s also a ridiculous, past it, sad old fossil who can’t just sit back, and let the younger competitors have their place in the spotlight. My father is one of the reasons why I STILL haven’t found the respect I’m looking for. No, there would no way in Hell I would EVER knowingly help that stupid looking old corpse win the title.”

MEXICAN: “Listen to Dan rip into his father, essa! This is great!”

DAN: “So that brings us to the other conclusion, and I’m sure by now even the backward CWF fans can realise that I interfered in that title match for one reason and one reason alone; Phil Leach. Cheer him all you want, with every pro-Phil chant you only make my hatred for that other ridiculous fool even greater. I came back to the CWF to fight Phil and prove I was the better warrior, not be lumbered again with my circus clown of a father, and CERTAINLY not to waste my time involving myself with that loser Kyle Reece and that …. Ohhh!!!! … that …. that … COW Acid!!”

MOSHER: “Dan Jones certainly showing no love loss for his former business partner here…”

DAN: “What did I want from the CWF? Title shots! Meaningful Main Event battles! And above all else, a showdown with Phil Leach! What did Acid promise to me? All of theses! And what did she give me? NOTHING! She was too busy playing kiss and chase with that pathetic pond worm Kyle Reece to care about me- to care about fulfilling her promises! Well Acid., I’ll see you in hell! There’s only one person important to me now … and that’s the person whose head I caved in last Sunday at Shindig Slam … Phil ‘The Man’ Leach!”

[Instantly as the name is uttered, “It’s My Life” blasts into the Cwmbran Centre, taking hold of the ecstatic fans. The arena lights turn a shade of purple and Phil ‘The Man’ Leach storms out onto the entrance ramp dressed in full Pimp finery. No funny dance or groovy walk tonight, Phil marches towards the ring glaring a hole through Dan Jones. In the ring, the Lone Wolf watches the angry former CWF Champion head his way with a hint of amusement on his face.]

MOSHER: “Here comes the now ex-CWF Champion, and boy, does he not look happy!”

[The Gentleman Pimp angrily snatches a microphone from Mr Tuck and stamps into the ring. Phil Leach makes a beeline for Dan Jones and stares his adversary coldly in the eyes.]

PHIL: “Give me one reason why I shouldn’t do you like the biggest kipper ever seen right here … right now!”

[Dan Jones smiles crookedly, only infuriating The Gentleman Pimp even further.]

DAN: “Why Phil, I can’t think of anything I’d like more. You see, I want you to fight me, I want you to be so angry, so furious, so consumed by vengeance and hatred that you tear me apart … Phil … we both know what I’m talking about. I’m fascinated with it, and I want to be a part of it. Phil … give in to your hate … the only way you will be able to destroy me and exact your revenge is through … THE RAGE!!”

[A huge gasp can be heard from the watching fans in the arena. Phil Leach shifts uncomfortably, seemingly wrestling with his conscience. Dan meanwhile, looks on hungrily. Finally, Phil’s body relaxes and he lifts his microphone to his lips.]

PHIL: “Dan … I gotta hand it to you, that’s a heinous plan you’ve out together- cost me the title and cause me to unleash THE RAGE. But you’ve got one problem, bucko. I know how much damage THE RAGE can cause- how much pain and suffering will be felt if ever I let it take hold of me. And that’s just too high a price to pay … and my will power? Unfortunately for you Dan, my will power is just too strong!”

MEXICAN: “I can’t believe Dan Jones wants to feel the effects of THE RAGE!!Is he insane, chico?!”

[Dan grimaces slightly, obviously exasperated that his plan will require a little more effort.]

DAN: “Ha, how very admirable of you, Phil, choosing to battle against the al-consuming seduction of THE RAGE, keeping it inside you, locking it away to try and prevent it from ever escaping. I can see you might need more convincing… well how about the many bloody battles we’ve had over the years? How about how I intimidated your beloved friend Ruth just a few days ago? Oh yes, and what about this, Phil? Do you remember my little friend here?”

[Phil’s eyes blaze with anger as Dan lifts up the steel chair he is holding. Jones grins wolfishly at this reaction from his nemesis.]

DAN: “Ohhh … you DO remember it! That’s right Phil, this right here is the very steel chair I used Sunday night to cave your brains in and cos you the CWF Championship- 1 … 2 … 3. I sure bet that makes you real mad, eh Phil?”

[Phil Leach begins to shift uneasily on his feet, sweat beginning to pour down his face. The Gentleman Pimp licks his dry lips and tries to remain calm.]

DAN: “Here you are Phil … why not hold it for a moment?”

[A sick smile on his face, Dan Jones hands the weapon to Phil, who holds it outstretched in front of him, eyes wide with emotion. A chant of “Phil! Phil!” goes up, but the Gentleman Pimp is in a world of his own, wrestling frantically against his conscience.]

MEXICAN: “Look at Phil Leach, essa! He’s gonna snap! He’s gonna unleash THE RAGE!!”

MOSHER: “If he does, I’m taking cover!”

[In the ring, Dan Jones continues to taunt his rival mercilessly]

DAN: “Come on Phil, use that chair! Take it, and cave in my skull, just like I did to you on Sunday night! Use it! Smash me! Crown me! Make me feel pain! Let out all of that hate and anger and resentment and revenge! HIT ME PHIL! I WANT TO FEEL THE RAGE!! I WANT TO SUFFER YOU ANGER!!! HIT ME ! MIT ME!”

[A massive gasp goes up as Phil tears off his Pimp Hat and shades, and rips off his white suit jacket. Dan is smiling sadistically as the Gentleman Pimp wields the steel chair in preparation…]

MEXICAN: “It’s THE RAGE!!”

MOSHER: “Look out! She’s gonna blow!!”

[Suddenly to everyone’s surprise, “No Chance” blares over the PA, causing all eyes to turn towards the McMartynTron. The CWF Chairman Clive McMartyn hurries down to the ring with microphone in hand, shouting down the speaking device even as he is rushing down the entrance ramp.]

MCMARTYN: “STOP! STOP! STOP, STOP, STOP, STOP! Don’t move a muscle, either of you! Stay right where you are!”

[The CWF Chairman climbs into the ring as the fans in the arena boo loudly at this interruption to what surely would be a top notch brawl. Phil Leach and Dan Jones both look on with resentment at this arrival, Phil still tremoring as he tries to keep THE RAGE!! in check. Mr McMartyn hurriedly positions himself between the two nemeses as he begins to bargain.]

MCMARTYN: “Look, just calm down, both of you. I realise you both want to rip each other part here tonight, but I won’t allow that! This is network television; people normally pay to see that sort of thing! Think what ratings a properly marketed and promoted Phil Leach-Dan Jones match could make! Think of the money! The merchandising opportunities!”

DAN: “I don’t care about the ratings or the merchandising … I just want to feel THE RAGE!”

MCMARTYN: “Look, I don’t know what the hell this “THE RAGE” business is about, but I can help you Dan. You said yourself, that while working with my business partner Acid you achieved none of your aims … you didn’t get the title shots you wanted, nor the match with Phil here you craved so badly. Now you’ve seen the light, and got shot of that pointless waste of management space, I can help you out. Let ME come to your aid Dan; because what I want, I get … and a McMartyn can always help you get what you want!”

DAN: “What I want is simple, can’t you see? I just want HIM in a match!!”

PHIL: “Hey, come on, everyone wants a little of The Gentleman Pimp one on one!”

DAN: “Shut up you FOOL!”

[The CWF President waves his hands in a conciliatory gesture, attempting to calm his bickering wrestlers.]

MCMARTYN: “Look, look, I’ve come up with a way to solve this problem. For I, Clive McMartyn, have devised specially for you- the first ever “Best Of Five Speciality Match Tournament”!”

[The eyes of Dan Jones glint as he listens intently, as does Phil ‘The Man’ Leach.]

MCMARTYN: “Five matches that take place over the course of one month; each one a different type of speciality or gimmick contest. The both of you compete in these matches alone; you will be put in no other matches during the course of this tournament. Each of you takes turns to choose the type of match you wish to participate in. I, however, choose the fifth speciality match, the one that will take place in one month’s time at the Pay Per View. The winner of the most matches in the series will be declared the undisputed winner of the “Best Of Five Speciality Match Tournament”! So what do you gentleman say? Dan, are you in?”

DAN: “Yes … very much so.”

MCMARTYN: “And Phil Leach- what about you?”

PHIL: “Does the Pope live in the White House?”

MCMARTYN: “Er… I’ll take that as a yes. In that case, excellent, we have ourselves a tournament! Now, let us decide who will have the first choice of matches…”

DAN: “I suggest we decide with a good old fashioned fight!”

MCMARTYN: “No, I suggest we decide with a good old fashioned coin toss … Mr Leach, call if you would…”

PHIL: “Heads.”

[Phil Leach calls as Mr McMartyn flips the coin he has pulled out of his pocket and it flies up into the air. The CWF Chairman catches the coin and turns to Phil.]

MCMARTYN: “Well Mr Leach- heads it is … it seems you have first pick on which type of match to compete in.”

[A small snarl flashes across Dan Jones’ face as Phil Leach paces a little, considering his choice. Finally, he turns back to Dan and Mr McMartyn.]

PHIL: “Well kids, I can’t think of anything more fitting for the very first contest in our little tournament than … a FIRST BLOOD MATCH!”

[A loud cheer bursts from the crowd at Phil’s announcement.. The CWF Chairman raises an eyebrow, but strangely Dan has a nasty smile across his face.]

DAN: “First Blood? Why Phil, that suits me just fine … this Redemption, it’s going to be a hard case of déjà vu … because I’m going to be leaving you a bloody mess on the canvas … JUST like I did at Shindig Slam!”

[“I Stand Alone” hits as Dan Jones drops the mike and climbs out of the ring, stalking back up the entrance ramp. Realising he may not be Phil Leach’s most popular person thanks to his actions at Shindig Slam, Mr McMartyn hurriedly makes his exit also. Left alone in the ring, Phil Leach taps his “Swede” thoughtfully as the cameras fade out…]

[The cameras switch to the locker room area. The current location is Acid's V.I.P locker room. The CWF VP, and also new Women's Champion, is lying with her head on something. Her face is an expression of sadness. As the camera zooms out we see then Acid's head is resting on the shoulder of none other than Julai Parker. The crowd outside in the arean cheer for Julia! Julia seems to be giving Acid some friendly comfort.]

JULIA: "Are you sure you're ok? I don't think I've ever seen you look this depressed since you found out that Guns N' Roses were cancelling their UK Tour for the second time in a row!"

[Acid sits up.]

ACID: "I dunno. Do you think I did the right thing. At Shindig, I mean?"

JULIA: "Acid, only you can answer that one. Only you know what's right for you. Personally, I think no, but then again, remember what happened with Dark Venom in the WWCW?"

ACID: "I know. I know. I already had a conversation about that with Fallon. Work and pleasure mixing- not good."

JULIA: "Well then. What's the problem?"

ACID: "I guess I feel a bit guilty embarassing him like that. Plus I don't think Dan and me will be working together again. I think he hates me at the moment. I'm surprised he didn't try to take my head off when I slapped him!"

JULIA: "I'm glad your dealings with Dan are over actually. That guy was always way too serious. You couldn't have a joke or anything around him coz you'd always feel like you'd offend him or something. He seriously needs to lighten up."

ACID: "Well, with what what McMartyn said earlier, Dan will have his hands full for a few weeks, so I need not concern myself with him anymore."

JULIA: "True. All you need to do now is worry about your match with Fallon tonight."

ACID: "I'm all set, don't worry. This is just a little friendly competition. The title in the middle is just a way of saying thank you to Fallon for helping me out while you were away."

JULIA: "It's good to be on your good side isn't it? Title shots galore!"

[Acid laughs half heartedly.]

ACID: "I'm just a generous person, I guess."

JULIA: "Pity Felicia didn't find that for herself! Where is she anyway?"

ACID: "Damian Ali was suspended after Shindig because of his behaviour during the Theatre of Pain match. Blue Flash is out on injury for a week because of it, and we just brought him back! I suggested that Felicia join Damian on a little vacation for a week or two. Nothing but peace and quite around here for a little while."

JULIA: "True. I'm going to go get something to drink. Want anything?"

ACID: "No. I'm fine."

JULIA: "OK. Be right back."

[Julia gets up and leaves the room, leaving Acid alone.]

u>CWF WOMEN'S CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH
Acid vs Fallon
Referee: Sid Jefferies

MOSHER: "More women's competition up next, with the newly crowned CWF Women's Champion, Aci taking on Fallon."

MEXICAN: "Fallon?! Where?!"

MOSHER: "Of course, Fallon took things to the extreme on Sunday night at Shindig Slam after winning her tag team match by DQ. The flame-haired diva not only floored the Shuck with the Contradanza, but also nailed Asya wih a chair!"

MEXICAN: "Maybe this will be the shortest title reign yet?"

[As the music starts up, Fallon appears from behind the curtain.]

TUCK: "The following contest is scheduled for one and is for the CWF Women's Championship. Introducing first, the challenger. From Leicester... FALLON!!!"

[Fallon waves to the crowd before walking down the ramp and climbing into the ring.]

MOSHER: "Fallon and Acid are old friends, of course, so it's hardly surprising that Fallon gets the first shot at the Women's belt during Acid's reign."

[The arena goes pitch black. Music, or more like the sound of a man being gutted to harsh guitar riffs, plays over the sound system as some captions flash onto the big screen- "Worthlessness is only the beginning... Life does not begin until... you comprehend... that one day... you too will die..." There's a flash of white light as the opening riffs to 'Left Behind' scream out over the arena.]

TUCK: "And her opponent- she is the CWF Women's Champion... ACID!!!"

[The arena lightens up slightly as from the curtain emerges Acid. She strides confidently down the ramp with the women's belt draped over her shoulder.]

MOSHER: "Well, doesn't she look all sweetest and light?"

MEXICAN: "At least she's got one thing to be happy about, essa, and even that might not last much longer!"

MOSHER: "I haven't seen Kyle Reece around the arena yet. He's got his title shot against the Huckster tonight. Do you think he'll show up?"

MEXICAN: "Doubt it, el Captaino..."

[Acid climbs into the ring and hands over the Women's belt to Sid Jefferies as 'Left Behind' fades away. Acid and Fallon shake hands before Sid Jefferies calls for the bell for the match to begin...]

[DING! DING! DING!]

[Acid and Fallon enter the tie up, Acid gaining the momentum and giving Fallon a belly-to-belly suplex. Acid drags Fallon up by the head, only to receive a strike to the mid section. Acid backs off as Fallon gets fully to her feet. Fallon poses for the crowd before running straight at Acid and spearing her!]

MOSHER: " Nice move there by Fallon!"

[This time Fallon pulls Acid up by the head and then delivers a DDT, sending the Women's champion face first into the canvas. Fallon goes to deliver some kicks to the chest and mid section of Acid, but Acid grabs her foot and pulls Fallon down.]

MOSHER: "Smart move there by the Women's Champion!"

[Acid then begins mounting punches on Fallon until Sid Jefferies breaks up the two women. Fallona dn Acid both get to their feet and re-enter the tie up. Acid goes out on top again, sending Fallon flying into the ropes. As sjhe comes back, Acid attempts to clothesline Fallon, but Fallon ducks and stops still behind Acid to deliver a devasting round-the-world kick to the head of Acid! Acid slams back down onto the canvas and Fallon covers her...]

[..1..]

[..2..]

[.. Kick out!]

[Somehow Acid manages to kick out after that blow to the head. Fallon shrugs and decides to mount some more punches before covering Acid again...]

[..1..]

[.. Kick out after 2!]

MOSHER: "Fallon will never win the title by doing that!"

MEXICAN: "The chica can do it however she feels! She can do me however she feels!"

MOSHER: "My word!"

[Fallon is a little frustracted as she drags Acid to her feet and whips her into the corner. As she attempts to splash Acid, Fallon hasn't realised that Acid has in fact jumped onto the top rope. Fallon ploughs towards the corner, but is greeted with senton bomb from the top rope by Acid! The two women hit the canvas and lie there, not moving. Sid Jefferies begisn the count...]

[..1..]

[..2..]

MOSHER: "High rise manoever there by Acid. I don't think Fallon counted on that!"

MEXICAN: "Get up Fallon!"

[..3..]

[..4..]

[..5..]

[Slowly both Fallon and Acid start to climb to their feet.]

[..6..]

[Acid is first to get up, followed closely by Fallon, who is staggering slightly, no dount reeling from that blow from that senton bomb. Acid sees her opportunity and bounces off the ropes. Fallon seems to have the same idea as she too bounces off the ropes. The two women collide mid air as they both perform drop kicks on each and kiss the canvas once again.]

MOSHER: "Whoa!"

[Sid Jefferies starts another 10 count...]

[..1..]

[..2..]

[..3..]

[..4..]

[..5..]

[Fallon is the first to her feet whilst Acid, who seems to have taken the majority of the blow, still lies on the canvas. Fallon sees her opportunity to pick up the win and quickly goes for the cover...]

[..1..]

[..2..]

[..Wait a minute! Here comes Asya!]

[Fallon breaks up the pin as Asya comes sprinting out of the curtain, down the ramp into the ring. Fallon jumps to her feet to defend herself against Asya. To her surprise, Asya doesn't attack her when in the ring. Instead, she goes for Acid. Asya drags Acid up by the head. She climbs to the top rope dragging her Acid with her and delivers a powerbomb from the top rope!]

MEXICAN: "Holy nachos! ASYAN POWERBOMB!"

[Sid Jefferies calls for the bell and tells Ralph Tuck to make the announcement.]

[DING! DING! DING!]

TUCK: "The winner of this match as the result of a disqualification, and STILL the CWF Women's Champion... ACID!!!"

MOSHER: "Looks like Asya is looking to finish what Fallon started at Shindig Slam! She's just cost Fallon the belt!"

MEXICAN: "Aye carumba!"

[Asya climbs out of the ring with a satisfied grin on her face as Acid's music plays over the speakers. Acid is sturggling to get up with the help of Fallon, who is positively irate. Sid Jefferies hands Acid her belt as the Women's Champ clutches her lower back in pain.]

[Kyle Reece is makming his way towards the entrance to the arena when the annoying Emma catches up with him. She's shouting after him but he's just ignoring her and keeps walking.]

EMMA: "Kyle! Kyle! Mr Reece! Please can I have a word?!"

[Reece keeps walking, but Emma runs after him, her camera crew in tow.]

EMMA: "Please! What comments do you have regarding the situation with Acid?!"

[Reece stops suddenly and turns around. Emma almost crashes into him.]

REECE: "Acid?! ACID?! You want me to talk about her to you?! What do you want me to say?! That she broke my heart?! That she made me feel like shit?! Is that it?! Well, I'd rather piss glass than let her get any laughs out of me. Now, if you'll excuse me- I've got a match."

[Reece walks off twoards the curtain and waits for his cue to enter the arena. Emma stands a little away from him.]

EMMA: "Poor guy... poor, por Reece... This is all so... tragic! Where's Phil! I need a hug!"

[Emma goes off in search of Phil for a hug.]

Stone Cold Andy Morgan vs Disco Stu
Referee: Gary Willis

MOSHER: Well my little friend, this is a match that has been a long time coming. These two competitors have had a long and tempetuous relationship over the last month, and it looks like its all come to a head at last.

MEXICAN: Yees Senor Mosher, thees bizarre partnership has taken a turn for thee worse seence Shindig Slam! Deesco Stu lost Stone Cold hees belt, and Andy was not happy! I think Stone Cold has had hees fill of Disco Stu and wants to end eet here.

MOSHER: I wonder how Stu will hold out tonight against the legend that is Stone Cold Andy Morgan. We’ve all seen Disco Stu fight, and he’s not really the most gifted of superstars is he? Well here we go viewers, this is it!

TUCK: “The following match is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, from Llantrisant Usk weighing in at 251 lbs, STONE COLD ANDY MORGAN!!”

(The fans go wild as Stone Cold Andy Morgan’s entrance music begins to play, and the man himself storms down to the ring.

TUCK: “…And his opponent, from Jamaica, DISCO STU!”

(Andy stands waiting in the ring as Disco Stu makes his way down, much more cautiously than is his usual style.)

MEXICAN: Senor Morgan, hee does not look happy, essa?

MOSHER: I think you’re right my friend, this could spell trouble for Stu!

(Referee Willis signals for the match to start and the bell is rung. Andy goes straight to work on Stu, landing a volley of hard right-handers on him. Stu backs away from Andy, and soon finds himself stuck in a corner. Panicking, he tries to climb the turnbuckle; but as he does Stone Cold picks him off and launches a huge belly-to-back suplex. Stu jumps straight to his feet and climbs out of the ring away from Andy. Stone Cold dives through the ropes and lands a flying rugby tackle on Stu, driving him hard into the ground. He picks him up again and slams him straight back down. Picking him up a third time, Stu finally decides to put up a resistance, and begins to punch Andy in the ribs. Smiling slightly, Andy puts Stu down again.)

MOSHER: What happened then? Andy seemed pleased that Stu hit him. I think he’s still got a soft spot for his pupil and wants to see him succeed.

(Stu begins to pummel Andy with a flurry of punches, but unfortunately none of these seem to have any affect on the laughing Andy. Andy, ignoring Stu’s attacks, walks around the ring to the commentator’s stand and picks up a microphone. He then jumps into the ring and motions for Stu to join him. Stu apprehensively clambers into the ring and stands with Stone Cold.)

SCAM: You finally started to fight me, I wondered how long it would take.

STU: It was no use though, I just can’t fight. I lost you that match, I can’t even hurt anyone. I shouldn’t bother anymore.

SCAM: That’s the attitude that’s losing you fights Stu. You have no self belief and you can’t compete without self belief. I’ve seen you do that knee drop thing and knock people out in training, but you never perform in the ring. I think you’re right though, you should stay out of wrestling and train more.

STU: But what can I do then? I don’t just wanna quit.

SCAM: You’re still my pupil. You will work for me, watch my back and learn from me. But you will no longer be an active wrestler.

STU: So we’re still a team, my man?

SCAM: (sighing) NO! We’re not a team, we were never a team. You are my PUPIL. My APPRENTICE. Not my equal you little runt. But we stick together now, yes.

STU: (grinning) I knew you’d stick with me, cat! Disco Stu and Stone Cold Andy Morgan, the smoothest team wrestlerville!

SCAM: Just shut up, will you? Shut the hell up! Oh, and one more thing before we go Stu? We’re still in a fight. And you still owe me a belt!

(With that, Stone Cold delivers an awesome Stunner that sends Stu bouncing across the ring! Satisfied of his vengeance, he storms from the ring and out of the arena. Mr Tuck collects the discarded microphone as Gary Willis takes a long look at the unconscious Stu and signals across to the ring announcer.)

TUCK: “The winner of this match, by knockout, is Stone Cold Andy Morgan!”

EVENING GOWN MATCH Rabbi Dobba vs The Shuck Referee: Sid Jefferies

TUCK: "The following match is an evening gown match! Introducing first..."

["Pretty Fly For A Rabbi" starts up. Rabbi Bernie Dobba makes his entrance. He appears thoroughly embarassed, dressed in a floral summer dress with short, puffy sleeves. His face, in contrast to the flowery pattern, is a deep red. He glances around nervously as the fans laugh their heads off. He attempts to enter the ring, but finds himself hampered by the unusual attire. Dobba is forced to step underneath the middle rope to enter the squared circle.]

TUCK: "...RABBI BERNIE DOBBA!"

MEXICAN: "Oh my God! This is really disturbing! Thank God this doesn't happen often!"

MOSHER: "Agreed! I'm not eager to see Dobba in a dress again, anytime soon!"

[The music changes. "The Bum Bum Song" begins. Tom Ickleberry makes his entrance. He strides confidently onto the entrance ramp. "The Shuck" is adorned in a little black number, obviously rather too small for him. Despite the his surreal appearance, "Shuck" seems to think himself rather fetching. He wiggles his hips to the fans, seeming to think their laughter is a compliment. He struts down the ramp to the ring.]

TUCK: "His opponent, TOM 'THE SHUCK' ICKLEBERRY!"

MOSHER: "Good lord! He's even worse! He's actually enjoying this!"

MEXICAN: "Aye carumba!"

[The referee, struggling to contain his amusement, calls the two men to the centre of the ring. He has a few words with each of them. Dobba nods to him, but avoids eye contact. "Shuck" bats his eyelashes at the ref, causing the poor man to take a fearful step away. The disgruntled official calls for the bell.]

MEXICAN: "I hope this will be mercifully short!"

[Rabbi Dobba, longing to escape his floral garb, goes right to work on Shuck. He nails him with some stiff rights, staggering him back. Dobba whips Shuck, then floors him with a Drop Toe Hold. He stomps him a couple of times, then reaches down and trys to pull Shuck's black number off his back. Shuck squirms to get away.]

MOSHER: "This is really freaky!"

[Somehow, Shuck gets to his feet again. He elbows Dobba in the face, stunning him, then Scoop Slams him. It is now Shuck's turn to try and pull the Rabbi's dress off. The pulls at the frilly lining, ripping the bottom off. Dobba is reduced to a pair of maroon panties and a puffy, flowery top, made up of the remains of the dress. Dobba manages to roll away before Shuck can cause any more damage. He gets back to his feet.]

MEXICAN: "Oh God! I really don't want to have to look at Dobba dressed like that!"

[Dobba hits a Jawbreaker, then floors Shuck with a Piledriver. He pulls at one of the shoulder straps of Shuck's dress, ripping off a sizeable chunk of material. Shuck battles back. Be manages to low blow Dobba, then pulls the flowery top over his head. Dobba stumbles back before the remains of his dress is removed completely, but he is now running around blind. Shuck manages to sneak around behind Dobba, as he battles with his clothing, and gives him a wedgie.]

MOSHER: "Ooh! That was nasty!"

MEXICAN: "That is one sick individual!"

[Dobba collapses to the mat in pain, giving Shuck chance to pull off what is left of his dress. Dobba is left lying on the canvas, adorned only in some maroon, women's underwear, standing out visibly against his pasty white, skinny form. Shuck stands up and raises the flowery fabric above his head in triumph, his own dress hanging lopsided from the single remaining shoulder strap.]

MOSHER: "Well, 'Shuck' picks up the win in this very disturbing match up!"

MEXICAN: "I'm glad it's over!"

[As Shuck parades about the ring, Dobba rolls under the ropes and jogs up the ramp, trying to cover his shame with his hands. "The Bum Bum Song" plays again.]

TUCK: "The winner of this match, 'THE SHUCK'!"

MOSHER: "After this oddball meeting, I'm sure this isn't the end of the feud between these two!"

[Following her attack perpertrated by Asya, Acid and Fallon are leaving the makeshift infirmary and are heading back to Acid's locker room.]

FALLON: "Sorry about that. I didn't mean for you to get caught up in the middle of this little tiff I'm having with Asya."

ACID: "It's OK. I've had problems with Asya myself. I think she's still a little pissed off at me because I took her Women's Championship from her at one point during my time at the ESW. I'd need not worry too much about that woman- she's highly overrated."

[Fallon laughs. The two women continue to walk down the corridor when suddenly one of the cleaning ladies comes bursting out of a door to the left of them. She stumbles backwards and lands on her bum on the ground. Acid and Fallon got to see if she's ok.]

ACID: "Are you all right?"

FALLON: "What happened?"

[The cleaning woman is shaking and stutters when she talks.]

CLEANING WOMAN: "T-t-that g-g-guy K-kid Punk did this!"

ACID: "Why?!"

CLEANING WOMAN: "D-d-don't know! H-he just attacked m-m-me!"

Fallon and Acid help the woman to her feet.]

ACID: "Take her to the EMT's. I'll go and see what all this is about."

FALLON: "Okie! Come on!"

[Fallon helps the cleaning woman down the corridor whilst Acid enters the room that the woman flew out of. It's a tiny room, containing various equipment and cleaning supplies. Acid looks around and sees Kid Punk trashing the room. He's throwing things on the floor and generally making a mess.]

ACID: "What in the hell do you think you're doing?!"

[Kid Punk ignores her completely and keeps going. Acid exits the room, looking around for someone to help calm Kid Punk down. She sees Deftonial coming towards her.]

ACID: "Deftonial! Thank God! Erm... Kid Punk is in there causing a bit of a rucase. Would you mind sorting him out?"

[Deftonial walks past Acid, ignoring her and she watches him leave, disgusted. Suddenly Fallon returns with Chief of Security Neil Hunt and a couple of heavies.]

FALLON: "I dropped that woman off and went to get Neil. I thought it might be safer that way"

NEIL: "Where is he?"

ACID: "In there. Be careful."

[Neil and the heavies enter the room. There's a bit of a scuffle, but eventually the three of them come out with Kid Punk.]

ACID: "Take him back to his hotel- or wherever it is that he's staying- and make sure he calms the hell down."]

[Acid then addresses Kid Punk directly.]

ACID: "Considering the damage you've causing and the potential law suit that could possibly be filed against the company because of your behaviour, I'm going to dock your pay for a month to pay for all the damage you've caused, plus you'll be in action on Thursday Night at Redemption. If you don't like that... then you can GET BENT! Get him the hell out of here!"

[Neil and the heavies drag the furious Kid Punk away, whilst Fallon and Acid regard each other and sigh.]

ACID: "Sod this! I'm going back to the hotel! I've had enough excitement for one night, thank you very much."

FALLON: "Aren't you going to watch Reece's match?"

ACID: "..."

FALLON: "Acid?"

[Acid doesn't reply and turns to head back to the locker room, followed by Fallon.]

CWF CHAMPIONSHIP
The Huckster vs Kyle Reece
Referee: Adrian Davies

[DING! DING! DING!]

[The ringing of the bell draws the crowd's attention to the centre of the ring where Ralph Tuck is waiting patiently, microphone in hand.]

TUCK: "It's time for the main event!"

MOSHER: "It certainly is!"

TUCK: "The following contest is scheduled for one fall and is for the CWF Championship! Introducing first, from New York City, weighing in at 215lbs... KYLE REECE!!!"

['Give me fuel! Give me fire! Give me that which I desire!' Red and orange pyrotechnics explode as Kyle Reece makes his way through the crowd. He climbs over the barrier and then into the ring. He sheds his coat and waits for his opponent...]

MOSHER: "Kyle Reece is the #1 contender- he won that title at Shindig. He's set to square off against the Huckster- the new CWF Champion!"

MEXICAN: "I'm surprised Reece is here! I wasn't sure if the gringo would show up!"

MOSHER: "Indeed, Mex! He looks a little pissed off!"

MEXICAN: "He looks a little red!"

[Reece paces the ring impatiently, waiting for the Huckster to make an appearance. He doesn't have to wait long... the lights turn red and yellow as "Real American" blares out over the arena sound system. "The Huckster" Bob Jones appears out on the entrance ramp to a mighty nostalgic roar from the crowd. He taunts and flexes, stroking the CWF CHampionship which is around his waist, before making his way gingerly down the ramp and into the ring.]

TUCK: "And his opponent, the CWF CHampion... THE HUCKSTER BOB JONES!!!"

[In the ring, the Huckster cups his ear to listen to the great ovations that still ring in his ears from a by-gone era, then rips off his red "Huckstermania" t-shirt and throws it to the crowd.]

MOSHER: "The new CWF Champion, the Huckster. I didn't think I'd ever live to see that again!"

MEXICAN: "I didn't think HE'D live to be CWF Champion again!"

[The Huckster continues to strut his tuff in the ring, whilst Kyle Reece leans back against one of the turnbuckles, waiting impatiently for the match to start. Senior Referee Adrian Davies calls the two men to the centre of the ring and goes over the rules with them. When all is said is said, Adrian Davies calls for the bell...]

[DING! DING! DING!]

MOSHER: "And here we go!"

MEXICAN: "The old gringo vs the red-faced gringo- somebody hand me a pillow!"

[The Huckster is all hyoped up and ready to go, but Reece is less than ethusiastic when the two men enter the tie up. The Huckster, putting more effort into the struggle gains momentum and hip tosses Reece to the mat. Reece springs back up again, only to be hip tossed again by the champ. Whilst Reece is on the mat, the Huckster bounces off the rope, hoping to catch Reece with an elbow drop. Reece rolls out of the way and the Huckster's elbow makes vcontact with the canvas. Reece again springs to his feet, bounces off the ropes and baseball slides straight into the Huckster, who is still clutching his elbow!]

MOSHER: "What a move by Reece! The Huckster certainly didn't expect that!"

MEXICAN: "::yawns::"

[Huckster gets to his feet and pulls Reece up. He then gives Reece 4 chops to the chest before whipping him to the turnbuckle. Reece bounces back straight into a clothesline from the Huckster. Huckster then plants a leg drop on Reece followed by a pinfall...]

[..1..]

[..Reece thrusts his shoulders off the mat and rolls out of danger.]

MOSHER: "Reece making sure not to go down so early in the match."

MEXICAN: "He just got lucky, essa!"

[Both men get to their feet and charge at each other. The Huckster goes for another clothesline but Reece ducks this and as the Huckster turns Reece hits him with a dropkick. This sends the Huckster stumbling back and bouncing back off the ropes to Reece who is ready and waiting for the Huckster and plants an overhead belly-to-belly suplex on the CWF Champion...]

MOSHER: "What a suplex from Reece!"

MEXICAN: "I seen better, essa."

[The crowd begins to cheer as Kyle Reece gains momentum, finally putting some heart and effort ino this match. Reece gets a powerbomb on the Huckster as the crowd go wild he then pulls him in position for the Military Press but while in the middle of the move the Huckster shrugs his way out of it and DDT's Reece down to the mat.]

MOSHER: "Both men are down! Who's gonna get up first?"

[The Huckster is first to his feet and he picks up Reece and leads him over to the turnbuckle. The Huckster begins to beat Reece's head against the turnbuckle. After a few hits he goes for another but Reece gives him an elbow to the gut and then goes to beat the Huckster's head against the turnbuckle before Adrian Davies steps in. The Senior Official separates the two men, reprimanding them both and then allowing the match to continue. The Huckster is a little dazed, but moves out of the way just in time as Kyle Reece attempts to spear him into the corner! Reece connects with the turnbuckle and falls back onto the canvas, motionless.]

MOSHER: I think Reece has knocked himself out!"

MEXICAN: "Really? Ha ha! What an idiot!"

[The Huckster goes to pin Reece, but Reece seems to have been faking it! He leaps to his feet with almost cat-like quickness and nails the champ with a devasting enziguri! The crowd go wild, some of them cheering on the Huckster, others cheering on Reece, as Reece pulls the veteran star to his feet, whips him into the ropes and performs a hurricanrama on the champion!]

MOSHER: "A lot of uncharacteristic moves there by Kyle Reece! Very impressive!"

[Reece grabs a handful of what is left of the Huckster's hair and pulls him up. He then locks in a sleeper hold on the champion. The Huckster is brought to his knees and is fading fast as Adrian Davies lifts up the Huckster's arm to see if he's pased out...]

MOSHER: "This could be it for the Huckster!"

[..1..]

MOSHER: "We could have a new champion!"

[..2..]

MOSHER: "I can't watch..."

[.. the Huckster's arm holds steady on the final drop!]

[The fans go wild, rising to their feet and chanting and cheering for the CWF Champion. The Huckster wriggles out of Reece's hold, and delivers a couple of elbows to the gut, sending Reece flying back against the canvas. The Huckster gets to his feet and stomps over to Reece, who is still on his back, and starts stomping a mud hole in the #1 contender! Adrian Davies breaks it up after a few seconds, allowing Reece to roll out of danger. The Huckster poses for the crowd, but doesn't see Reece come up behind him a hammer him with a chop to the head. The Huckster doesn't go down, much to Reece's surprise. Instead, he turns around and grabs Reece by the throat! Reece's face is shocked as the Huckster lifts him up and chokeslams him into the canvas! The Huckster follows this up with his patented leg drop. The crowd go wild as the Huckster stays on top of Reece for the cover. The fans count along with Adrian Davies...]

[..1..]

[..2..]

[..3!!]

[DING! DING! DING!]

TUCK: Here is your winner and STILL the CWF Champion... THE HUCKSTER BOB JONES!!!"

[The Huckster receives his belt from Adtian Davies, who promptly lifts the Hucksters arm into the air as 'Real American' plays over the arena. The fans are cheering for the champion, and booing for his fallen opponent, Reece. Reece, himself, is slipping out of the ring trying to look unnoticed. The expression on his face is that of embarassment and shame, and as he walks up the ramp he looks around at his disappointed fans.]

MOSHER: "What a way to end Turbulence! The Huckster is still champion..."

MEXICAN: "And Reece looks like he just soiled himself on nation tv! He looks like he's ready to hang himself!"

MOSHER: "Well, goodnight everybody!"

[The Huckster is parading around in the ring, going to each turnbuckle as Turbulence fades to a close.]