Alex Ferguson
Sex organ fuel

Paul Merson
Lump on arse

Martin Keown
I'm not wanker

Maine Road
I Am A Drone
A Dire Moan
No! I Am A Red

George Best
Go get beers

Fabrizio Ravanelli
Evil Brazilian afro

David Ginola
A livid gonad

Andy Gray
Randy Gay

Teddy Sheringham
He'd shag dirty men

Stan Collymore
Measly control

Peter Shilton
Enter hot lips

Peter Beardsley
Beery plastered

Match Of The Day
They of mad chat

Gareth Southgate
Treat to huge shag

Dennis Bergkamp
Pink German beds

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