JESUS PAID IT ALL
+++++++++
Procrastinating
as usual, 17-year-old Brian More had
only a short time to write something for the
Fellowship of Christian Athletes meeting. It
was his
turn to lead the discussion.
So he sat down and wrote.
He showed the essay entitled "The Room"
to his mother, Beth, before he headed out the door .
"I wowed 'em," he later
told his father Bruce.
It's the best thing I ever wrote."
It also was the last.
Brian's parents had forgotten
about the essay when a cousin found it while cleaning
out theteenager's locker.
Brian died May 27, 1997. He was
driving home from a friend's house when his car
went off the road and struck a utility pole.
He emerged from the wreck
unharmed,
but stepped down on a
downed power line and was electrocuted.
++++++++++++
THE ROOM
By Brian Keith More
In that place between wakefulness and
dreams,
I found myself in the room.
There were no distinguishing
features save for the one wall covered with
small index card files.
They were like the ones in
libraries that list titles by author or subject in
alphabetical order.
But these files, which stretched from floor to
ceiling
and right to left as far as the eye could see,
had very different headings.
As I walked up to the wall of files,
the first to catch my attention was one that read,
"People I Have Liked,"
I opened it and began flipping through
the cards.
I quickly shut it, shocked to realize that I
recognized the names written on each one.
And then
without being told, I knew exactly where I was.
This lifeless room with its small files was a crude
catalog system for my entire life.
The actions of my
every moment, big and small, were written in a detail
my memory couldn't match.
A sense of wonder and
curiosity mixed with horror stirred within me as I
began randomly opening files and exploring their
content.
Some brought joy and sweet memories, others a
sense of shame and regret so intense that I would
look over my shoulder to see if anyone was
watching.
A file named "Friends" was next to one
marked
"Friends I Have Betrayed."
The titles
ranged from common,
everyday things to the not-so-common
"Books I Have Read,"
"Lies
I Have Told",
"Comfort I Have Given",
"Jokes I Have Laughed At".
Some were almost hilarious in their exactness:
"Things I Have Yelled At My Brothers And
Sisters."
Others I couldn't laugh at:
"Things I Have Done In Anger",
"Things I Have Muttered Under My Breath At My
Parents".
I never ceased to be surprised by the contents.
Often there were many more cards than I expected.
Sometimes fewer than I had hoped.
I was overwhelmed by the sheer
volume of the life I had lived.
Could it be possible
that I had time in my 17 years to write each of these
thousands or millions of cards?
But each card confirmed the truth.
Each card was written in my own handwriting.
Each card was signed
with my signature.
When I pulled out the file marked
"Songs I Have Listened To",
I realized the files grew to contain their contents.
The cards were packed tightly, and yet after two or three
yards,
I hadn't found the end of the file.
I shut it, shamed, not so much by
the quality of music,
but more by the vast amount of time I knew that file
represented.
When I
came to the file marked
"Lustful Thoughts",
I felt a chill run through my body.
I pulled the file out only an inch not willing to test
its size,
and drew out a card, I shuddered at its detailed content.
I felt sick to think such a moment had been recorded.
A feeling of humiliation and anger ran through
my body.
One thought dominated my mind
"No one must ever see these cards!
No one must ever see this room!
I have to destroy them!"
In an
insane frenzy, I yanked the file out.
Its size didn't matter now.
I had
to empty it and burn the cards.
But as I took the file at one end and began pounding it on
the floor,
I could not dislodge a single card.
I became
desperate and pulled out a card,
only to find it as strong as steel when I tried
to tear it.
Defeated and utterly helpless,
I returned the file to its slot.
Leaning my forehead against the wall,
I let out a long ,self-pitying sigh.
That was when I saw it.
The file bore
"People I Have Shared The Gospel
With".
The
handle was brighter than those around it
- newer, almost unused.
I
pulled on its handle and a small box not more than 3 inches
long fell into my hands.
I could count the cards it contained on one hand.
And
then the tears came.
I began to weep.
Sobs so deep that the hurt
started in my stomach and shook through me.
I fell on my knees and cried.
I cried out of shame,
from the overwhelming shame of it all.
The
rows of file shelves swirled in
my tear-filled eyes.
No one must ever, ever know of this room.
I must lock it up and hide the key.
Then as I looked up through my tears,
I saw Him enter the room.
No, please,
not HIM.
Anyone but Jesus.
I watched helplessly as He began
to open the
files and read the cards.
I couldn't bear to watch His response.
The few times I looked at His face I saw such sadness
that it tore at my heart.
He seemed to intuitively go to the worst boxes.
Why did
He have to read every one?
Finally, He turned and looked at me from across the room.
He
looked at me with pity in His eyes.
But this was a pity that didn't anger me
I
dropped my head,
covered my face with my hands
and
began to cry again.
He walked over and put his arm around me.
He could have said so many things.
But He
didn't say a word.
He just cried with me.
Then He got up and walked back to the wall of files.
Starting at one end of the room,
He took out a file, and, one by one began
to sign His name over mine on each card.
"No!" I shouted,
rushing to Him.
All I could find to say was "No, no",
as I pulled the card from Him.
His name
shouldn't be on these cards.
But there it was, written in red so rich, so
dark, so alive.
The name of JESUS
covered
mine.
It was written
in blood.
He gently took the card back.
He
smiled a sad smile and began to sign the cards.
I
don't think I'll ever understand how He did it so
quickly,
but
the next instant it seemed I heard Him close the last file
and walked back to my side.
He placed His
hand on my shoulder and said,
"IT IS FINISHED" ! !
" I stood up,
and He led me out of the room.
There was no lock on the door.
There were still cards to be written.......
~Source Unknown
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