para sa isangmahal

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"for i and i and i to jump
and hurdle and skip and catch
and run and run and run"

isangmahal arts kollective

this page hasn't been up for a while, and that's because i've been trying but i just can't find a way to put into words what i am feeling about isangmahal. you just have to experience it for yourself. but what i can give you are some straightup facts...

isangmahal is a Seattle-based arts kollective founded in spring 1997 by Filipino-Americans who recognised the need for an outlet for Filipino artists to just come out and say what they had to say...

"this is our space, you said, it is our space
and that struck me as right
because i felt it was right
falling in it was right
into place it was right
and your peace, it was right
and your piece, it was right"

we are Artists-in-Residence with the Northwest Asian-American Theatre, located at 409 7th Ave. South in Seattle's Chinatown (International District). we hold monthly open mics at this theatre but have more recently been featured in poetry/spoken word/asian/arts events around the city. We have performed at and/or held workshops for the 1999 Seattle Poetry Festival, Jackstraw Studio Recordings, the artsEDGE festival held at the Seattle Center in June 1999, the Asian/Pacific American Labor Alliance (APALA) Celebration in May, open mic at the Four Angels Cafe on Capitol Hill, PISTA sa Nayon, Filipino Night at the University of Washington, Western Washington University, Showcase 2000 at Seattle University, Evergreen College, and at Washington State University.

our mission statement proclaims that we were "conceived to cultivate the minds of society through progressive and conscious art - create and maintain avenues of expression in which our voices may be heard - locate and create propaganda revealing the linkages which connect and bind us all - initiate critical analysis of our being, and to propagate love, which is the sole beginning of life, and the basis of all revolutions."

in the Filipino dialect of tagalog, the word isangmahal means "one love". and that's precisely the point of our existence - to promote and propagate the one love which acts as the only definite connecting force between all life. But in order to achieve that love, one must first understand and come to grips with oneself and so "the kollective envisions through KALAYAAN -liberation- of the mind, of the body, of the spirit, and of the soul, using art as one vehicle, a true self-REVOLUTION can be attained. In doing so, artists and analysts shall impact, recreate, redefine, and reconstruct the fluid culture of filipino amerika."

click to visit the official isangmahal arts kollective website
or e-mail us for more information

in October of 1998, this group of people came to the attention of a girl who, prior to that time, had no exposure to a Filipino community of any kind except the ones in her own school. a lowly sophomore who had been told that "isangmahal is just for college kids", she went to the October open mic show and was too nervous to think, for she had brought her own pieces to read and was so scared that she was just going to embarrass herself in front of people she didn't know. but her philosophy, once her nerves calmed enough for her to remember it, was going to be "if they don't know me, then it shouldn't matter. if i embarrass myself, i won't ever have to see them again, so it's all good." it's a long story but she eventually read and was asked to leave a phone number cuz they wanted to get a hold of her again...

November 1998 was the CD release party.

"As i was sitting in a hard plastic chair
i was breathing your spirit
and feeling your air
feeling the senses
not afraid to be faced
like the hurt of a memory
or the touch to embrace"

the words on that night spoke directly to her soul and told her that there were people out there who really got it. people out there who understood and she was amazed because with everything that they said - it was like they were reading her mind.

"feeling the fight that within me was new
and then Wait...how did they know?
that's what i'm going through"

she was inspired - and for the moment, she wanted to be just like them. she thought - "i could do that...i could be like that...i could be that..." and so she felt it flow deep deep down...and listened to that damn CD over and over and over again. it was on repeat on her changer almost every day for a month. i think.

"feeling it flow
like rivers of consciousness
like life that began with a deep breath
like words that repeated
as many times as were needed
and i felt it flow through me
like love"

things have changed a lot since then. she's no longer an outsider and she no longer wishes to be just like them. she has grown so much since last November - at first, she felt she needed to copy their style, use their words cuz she didn't know what to say - but it's different now. she got words of her own and so her poetry has gone from "all about isangmahal" to whatever it is she is feeling at the time when she writes. but it is because of isangmahal that that she has the inspiration to write what she needs to write and the courage to say what she has to say. with the members of isangmahal, she can completely let her guard down and be herself, and because of that, she is learning to just be herself in all situations. (make them see you for who you are. and they don't need to know any more than that unless you want to tell them.) before learning this, she held much anger and frustration inside because she often felt her color didn't match her culture and because she never knew what racial box to check on applications. but most of all, she was getting pissed because she continually thought she had to explain away the color of her skin, the shape of her eyes, her views on anything, and her whole self/life/experience to anyone who asked - or who didn't ask, for that matter. and she was getting so sick of explaining...

"but i was with you when i found out
that i didn't need to verify
my creations or tempations or vindicate my inclinations
that i didn't need to justify
my attitude or my actions
or my plenitude or distractions
that i didn't need a reason
to think what i see
or to just
be
when i finally figured out
that i didn't need to define the clothes i was in
or my smile
or my skin
or me

my mornings came a little easier."

as an artist friend of hers once said, things are falling into place, at least for this girl. she has found God, she has found friends, and she is always finding herself, and she is truly happy. in terms of guerrillas and performances, she's still got that philosophy of "if i don't know them, then i can do whatever the hell i want and it doesn't matter if i embarass myself, cuz i'm never going to see them again." except now it doesn't apply to isangmahal, because you guys are part of my family. mahal kita kayong lahat.

"with love i feel them
and i follow that call to move
and i follow that touch to embrace

present moment
beautiful moment
present moment
beautiful moment
present moment
beautiful moment
present moment
beautiful moment."

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