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Click to add to FavoritesClunkAn auto mechanic received a repair order that said to check for a clunking noise when going around corners.He took the car out for a test drive and made two right turns, each time hearing a loud clunk. Back at the shop, he returned the car to the service manager with this note: “Removed bowling ball from trunk.” She's Right!A Colleague was having a hard time operating her desk-top computer. It was apparent that she had reached the end of her patience when she muttered at the screen, "I know one thing. If I had a glass face like you do, I'd sure behave better."GossipBetty, the town gossip and self-appointed supervisor of the town's morals, kept sticking her nose into other people's business.Several local residents were unappreciative of her activities, but feared her enough to maintain their silence. However, she made a mistake when she recently accused Ted, a local man, of being an alcoholic after she saw his pickup truck parked outside the town's only bar one afternoon. Ted, a man of few words, stared at her for a moment and just walked away without saying a word. Later that evening, he parked his pickup truck in front of her house and left it there all night. Helping HandJack was returning to work Monday morning with two black eyes. His workmates were understandably curious: "Jack, what happened to you?!?""It was the darnest thing! I was at church yesterday, and this fat lady stood up in front of me. You know how a dress can get stuck in the crack of the butt of a fat lady? It looked funny. I figured she wouldn't like that, so I just reached over and pulled it out with a little tug. Next thing I know, she spins around and socks me one!" "Jeez, you got TWO black eyes in one blow?" "Naw. After she turned back around, I figured she was angry that I pulled the dress out of her crack -- so I tried to poke it back in..." |
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